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I HATE this recession~ my 90% from yesterday is only worth 70% today

chenheart's picture
Posts: 5180
Joined: Apr 2003

So...short and not so sweet! I met with my Breast surgeon today, who looked at my PET scan and felt my obvious lump. She unfortunately did not rule out cancer ( as I was dreaming she would), but even before doing the biopsy this morning ( may I just say OUCH?!) she already knew it was malignant, and needs to have that diagnosis verified.
I went from the biopsy to the cardiac center for an EKG, as I am having surgery next Tuesday morning to remove the offending node. Should only be there for half a day; I hate having to fast after mmdnight, go to the hospital at the should-be-illegal time of 5:45AM for an 8:45 surgery. I am doomed to suffer from caffeine deprivation headaches! LOL I know, maybe I should give up coffee! No No No...I have given up quite enough, thank you, as have the rest of you. I remain an unashamed coffee snob!

I thank you all for being there for me and with me; it is amazing how calm I was and am.

As you know "I am doing what I have to do, so I can do what I want to do."

Hugs and gratitude to you all!


phoenixrising's picture
Posts: 1511
Joined: Feb 2007

This has certainly been a disappointment, however, other than that there is NO cancer visible throughout your body and once this is out, there will be NO cancer visible in your body and so you can pick up where you left off with NED :) Which is right where we need you to be. I will continue sending all positive energies your way. Please don't worry, it'll be OK...big hugs,

jessiesmom1's picture
Posts: 869
Joined: Jun 2010

Hi Chen,

I am so sorry that you are having to go through all this. I must say that I truly admire your upbeat attitude. It is not always easy to be so positive. Don't you think that nobody should have to report to a hospital for surgery before 7a.m.? For my last surgery (11/10) I was told to be there at (gulp) 5a.m. My husband was not a happy camper.

dyaneb123's picture
Posts: 951
Joined: May 2009

My last surgery wasn't until 1:00 and the surgeon was delayed so it was really about 2:00! No food, no coffee , no nothing!Torture! So at least you'll have it over early in the day...and allow me to repeat..70% is still a very good number!

sea60's picture
Posts: 2617
Joined: May 2010

And gracious NO! Coffee is a woman's 2nd best friend! I struggle to break it off with Joe.

Our prayers and positive thoughts continue to wrap around you and hold you tight. We all don't mind getting up with you at 5:45! Put your pink boxing gloves on and get that offending node outta there!

Praying, as always for you and all the sisters and brothers. Please post soon but certainly rest up afterwards!

Hugs and love,


Double Whammy's picture
Double Whammy
Posts: 2791
Joined: Jun 2010

So sorry to hear about the node, Chen. Does she have any idea what she's going to do to you after she removes it? Or do we have to wait until after surgery? What will the surgery involve?

You know you have my prayers for this turning out well. That node offends me, too!


Jean 0609's picture
Jean 0609
Posts: 2462
Joined: Jun 2010

Did you tell them that you will have lots of company in the operating room on Tuesday? Keep the positive attitude and hang in there!


Posts: 1048
Joined: Aug 2006

I will be thinking of you. Surgery is definately a bummer. But don't go for the headache if it is not necessary. Tell the anesthesiologist (did I spell that right?) you need your morning fix and see if he can't give you a pill with a minute amount of water so you don't have to get a headache in addition to whatever the surgeon has to do. I distinctly recall the anes.... I'm not going to try to spell that again!...asking me if I wanted a caffine pill at a time in my life that I tended to avoid coffee. I didn't but I remember the conversation. So ask about it. They might be able to help you out. Good luck with your operation!

C. Abbott

cahjah75's picture
Posts: 2631
Joined: Jun 2010

you are a fighter! We are all here giving you support. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you face yet another surgery next Tuesday. I'm a tea totaler so I don't share your angst re coffee. I'm glad you feel calm and I agree with your comment. We do what we have to do in order to do what we want to do. You go girl!
{{hugs}} Char

bjmom1's picture
Posts: 152
Joined: Jan 2010

Chen I see you are just like me u have a good sense of humor. I too use humor to get me through the rough time. I will keep u in my prayers. I will make sure I have that cup of joe for you.

chenheart's picture
Posts: 5180
Joined: Apr 2003

I think of you so often, Barb~ I remember that you , Meena and I were rudely summoned to put on our boxing gloves and get back into fight mode at about the same time. Well, hopefuly, if all of us keep fighting, we will beat it into oblivion! GRRRRRRRR!


Posts: 598
Joined: Sep 2009

I am very glad your calm. Guess we just deal with whats been handed to us. I look at this as a chronic condition now. You and the others are always in my prayers.
I get those "lack of caffiene" headaches. I took a caffiene pill around 0100 and the headache wasnt hardly noticed. Maybe anesthesia can give you a hit of versed since you have to wait. That also helps the head and body relax. Good luck tomorrow. Hugs, Katz

Marsha Mulvey
Posts: 597
Joined: May 2010

How could she tell it's malignant? Maybe the earlier result of NED is correct. Just wondering, I probably missed something you said. Best wishes next Tuesday.

VickiSam's picture
Posts: 9080
Joined: Aug 2009

rest easy and try not to over do things. As for the 70%, I would take those odds any day of the week -! Damn === node. Sounds like you are in excellent hands, medically and at home with Reggie.

Excellent news, again, about the Pet scan!

I'll be with you on Tuesday ..early am .. this time I am bringing caffeine via infusion bag --I hope your OR nurse hooks it up for you.

Vicki Sam

Christmas Girl's picture
Christmas Girl
Posts: 3691
Joined: Apr 2009

I was certainly dreaming that same dream, Chen...

Yeah, OUCH! (Again - darn it!)

On Tuesday, your surgery room is gonna be awfully crowded - jam-packed with Kindred Spirits. Including me. xo

P.S. to Marsha - They can often (not always) tell by sight alone. And wouldn't say so if not already sure.

Dawne.Hope's picture
Posts: 825
Joined: Sep 2009

d@*# node!

But I'm with the rest of the sisters ... I'd take 70 odds anyday!

Prayers for you, sister! Peace, hope & healing!

And wasn't it VickiSam who had coffee on the day of her exchange surgery? Ask her about it, Chen! ;) Maybe she'll tell you how to sneak some in! ;)

Truly, much prayer coming your way!

pinkflutterby's picture
Posts: 615
Joined: Jun 2009

always tell myself, it could be worse!!! sending much love hugs and prayers your way as always Chen!!!

Heatherbelle's picture
Posts: 1227
Joined: Jun 2010

I will be right in there with you dear Chen :) You have been on my mind lately -im sending you lots of hugs & love & positivity across the country to you!

Posts: 311
Joined: Jan 2010

Thinking of you and sending the warmest, most loving thoughts your way.

fauxma's picture
Posts: 3580
Joined: Dec 2008

Insult on injury to have to be up and there so early but it's true that means you don't have to wait until the afternoon with an empty stomach and coffee deprived body. Sorry that this wasn't a swollen sweat gland but then you know you knew it wasn't. And you are handling this in true Chen Style, with grace and acceptance and fight. It will be so crowded in that operating room and we will have to watch Tracy closely because I just know she will be playing with all the instruments and wanting to do some of the surgery. Don't worry we will keep her away from anything sharp or pokey. We let her put on a mask and scrubs but that's it. Seriously, you know we will all be there in spirit and we will also be lighting the candles, sending the good vibes and positive spirits and loving prayers for you.

sausageroll's picture
Posts: 415
Joined: Dec 2008

Yes, you know we'll be there with you Chen. Stay strong and take care. Pat

Cindy54's picture
Posts: 454
Joined: Aug 2006

Hope they have a big enough OR next Tuesday to fit all of in there with you! Feel the love Chen, we'll be right next to you. Hugs, Cindy

pinkkari09's picture
Posts: 878
Joined: Sep 2009

Chen, I love your strength and kind spirit, you are amazing!! Now, one more thing I learned and love about you, I'm a "Coffee Snob" too. As I type I'm getting one more cup in before I have to quit (Brain MRI today at 3). I'm praying for strength for you and that God be with those Doctors. Here's saying they get that "sucka" out, and throw it on the floor and stomp on it!

Sher43009's picture
Posts: 602
Joined: Nov 2009

As others have said, your OR will be filled with standing room only. I pray you heal fast and be sure to have your favorite coffee flavor for when you get home.

aysemari's picture
Posts: 1596
Joined: Dec 2009

you are a smart lady to remain calm and save you strength
for the battle up ahead.

Does that node not know who it's messing with? I will be
thinking of you during that ungodly hour and sending you
positive vibes.


CypressCynthia's picture
Posts: 4014
Joined: Oct 2009

Oh crap Chen--I truly hate this disease. Definitely keep on your boxing gloves--I'm betting on you and your spirit! I will be there Tuesday for sure. Please keep us informed--you are in my prayers.

helen e's picture
helen e
Posts: 223
Joined: Sep 2009

if not in body then in spirit! Keep those boxing gloves on your are a true fighter and you'll beat this too. As you already know, we are all here for you and wish we could all be there with you. You're in my prayers.


MyTurnNow's picture
Posts: 2690
Joined: Aug 2009

Chen, I guess this beast has no idea who it's messing with, huh? You are one strong and very determined Kindred Spirit. Then, you add all of us to that mix and if you're smart you better run and fast. I'm sorry you are going through this again but so happy that you discovered the "lump" and had it checked it. As all my sisters have said, we're here for you and we'll also be there with you next Tuesday. I'll also make it a point to have an additional cup of joe in your honor. At least the surgery is early so it's that much quicker to your cup of joe. Sending strength and love to you!!!

P.S. I am actually a coffee snob, too.

Gabe N Abby Mom's picture
Gabe N Abby Mom
Posts: 2415
Joined: Sep 2010

Sending you more hugs and positive energy.


mwallace1325's picture
Posts: 806
Joined: Apr 2009

Is there a way to put up a "No Crappy News" sign on this board, so that we'd all only hear good things from now on?????

Love, prayers and healing angels are surrounding you, Reggie, and the medical team.

I'll have a Tab for you that morning (my caffeine delivery system of choice) cause I know how those headaches are.


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