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Is Mary Ann okay?

nempark
Posts: 683
Joined: Apr 2010

I know you are considering new treatment, but haven't seen you on board for awhile. Love June

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Mary Ann, I have been thinking about you today too....wondering how you are doing and how your treatments are going.

Big Hugs to you!! Karen

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daisy366
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

Hi everyone,

I just finished 2nd week of treatment - carboplatin weekly and daily "tomo" radiation - for recurrence of UPSC in my supraclavicular lymph nodes. I have 5 more to go.

The regime is tiring me out - plus working is not helping the situation. So this is my final week of work before taking FMLA to complete treatment and recoup. I need to increase my exercise and meditation big-time!!

Living in Florida is heaven this time of year. Yesterday I planted flowers and I will prepare a small vegetable garden. I have a great team of docs and am optimistic about dancing with NED again.

Thank you all. Wishing many blessings for all. Mary Ann

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Mary Ann, I am so happy to hear that your treatments are going well and really happy to hear that you are taking an FMLA so that you can focus on your treatments and healing your body and mind! The chemo and radiation combo takes it's toll and you need all of your energy to be focused on YOU!!

Am so glad to hear that you have such a wonderful team of docs and I know you will be dancing with NED soon! Have you picked the song yet?

Sending you more positive energy and BIG HUGS!!

Karen

Ro10's picture
Ro10
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

I too have been wondering how you are handling the chemo radiation combo. Glad you got through the second week of treatment. Hope the third week goes well, and the carbo and radiation are doing their jobs of shrinking those nodes.

Before long we will be in Florida to enjoy "the heaven" this time of year. It has been very nice here in Illinois with the fall colors beginning. We have a sugar maple in the front yard, and it is turning a very pretty orange. We have had 80 degrees these past few days, with low humidity, so it has been really nice.

I am trying to get my gardens ready for winter, but it seems too nice to be cutting some things back. It seems strange for someone to be planting a vegetable garden this time of year. Hope you get a lot of good veggies from it.

So happy to hear you are taking a FMLA and focusing on yourself. In peace and caring.

maggie_wilson's picture
maggie_wilson
Posts: 616
Joined: Nov 2009

of course we're going to start getting concerned when we don't hear from one of us for awhile. glad you've finished week two of your treatment; sounds rigorous, i have to say. but i recall you saying your doctors have had success with this treatment. so, no doubt you'll be dancing with your favorite partner ned again soon. so happy you are going to take that family medical leave, enough work already. don't over do the exercise; wonder if one can overdo meditation?

just good to hear from you mary ann, and to hear how well you're doing. keep us posted as you can.

hugs and sisterhood,
maggie

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norma2
Posts: 486
Joined: Aug 2009

Thinking of you and am so glad you updated us. Wishing you well with treatment and your garden.

daisy366's picture
daisy366
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

Thanks again for your caring and concern. Last week was challenging for me.

I started to get radiation side effects to my throat - like a painful lump that hurts to swallow. So eating and sometimes talking are getting harder - my voice is raspy. I was advised to give up singing and even limit talking. I started to panic about the thought of my throat swelling enough to close (they said this will NOT happen). I have meds (rons rum) to numb the throat in order to eat (only lasts a few minutes and tastes nasty), lozenges, rinse, and OTC pain meds. Doc said it WILL get worse and then I will need Rx pain meds - so they are saving this for later. I can only eat small portions of liquid or soft food. I was given xanax to help me sleep which I intend to start taking tonight!!! Today was my 20th of 35 treatments - AARGH!!!

AND.... I started getting "sensitivity" (allergic reaction) to carboplatin. The benadryl they gave IV also had bad effect. So I had to sleep it all off and cancel everything else except radiation that day. I have decadron to start taking 12 hours prior to next chemo to avoid this repeating. I have 3-4 more treatments.

On Sat I went to yoga and meditation group and had a healing touch session which soothed the throat for the weekend. I have a more positive (not panicky) attitude that will help me get through this one week at a time.

Today was day 1 of full time FMLA. Heaven!!! I'll keep you posted.

Mary Ann

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Mary Ann, I am so sorry to hear that you are having a rough time. It sounds like a rough road but I am confident you will WIN!! Am relieved that at least you are now on FMLA so youo can focus on YOU! You are an amazing lady and are approaching this bump in the road with such grace!

Am so happy that you took time out to do some yoga, meditation and healing touch...think that was probably better than any medicine and very healing.

Kee us posted....Bless you!

Karen

maggie_wilson's picture
maggie_wilson
Posts: 616
Joined: Nov 2009

and sorry, sorry it's been such a tough row to hoe. it sounds like if it's not one thing, it's another, all painful. i'm glad they can offer you some relief, and this ordeal really will be over, but it sounds like one foot in front of the other for now. thank goodness for fmla! and meditation, yoga and healing touch--all so good for you. just know we're all thinking of you, and are with you in spirit. hang in there, mary ann.

hugs and sisterhood,
maggie

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Mary Ann

It was so nice to hear from you. I know I haven't posted but I have been thinking about you. I am sorry to hear about your sensitivity, but I am glad you are getting a more positive attitude.

My thoughts and wishes go out to you for a speedy recovery and positive thoughts throughout your treatment process!

Kathy

Ro10's picture
Ro10
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

Hope you are feeling a little better. Sorry to hear that the throat pain will get worse. If you need the Rx pain medicines, please ask for them and take them. Sorry to hear about the reaction to the Carbo, too. Hope the decadron works for you. I took 20 mg of decadron the night before, and the morning of chemo and it helped decrease my reactions.
glad you have the yoga, meditation and healing touch session to make you feel better. Enjoy you FMLA. It is well deserved. You remain in my pryaers. In peace and caring.

Always Hopeful
Posts: 234
Joined: May 2010

Dear Mary Ann,

I am sorry to read you are going through such a rough time. How great that yoga, meditation and the healing touch helped you get through the weekend. I do hope that all improves very soon. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

Peace and hope,

JJ

hopeful girl 1
Posts: 454
Joined: May 2010

I am thinking of you and sending hugs your way.
You can do this.

Strength and healing,

Cindy

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upsofloating
Posts: 473
Joined: Dec 2009

Hi Mary Ann
I'm sorry to hear that this course of therapy is taking such a toll :-( I do remember my radiation treatments for breast cancer some years, not so much fun. It is soooo good that you are able to take FMLA.
Some years ago I took a climbing class, planned for but then turned out to be very bad timing but continued anyway. Last class was a full-on mtn climb, hiking into a base camp and then doing climb next day. I was in no condition to be there. As the hike in went on and on and on, the leader/instructor to keep us moving on, would just brightly call out "just one more ridge to go!" As reality had it, there were many more ridges to get over and several more miles with heavy packs on our back, but with each 'just one more ridge' our spirits lifted and onward we were able to trudge. So every day Mary Ann, just think 'one more ridge'! I do this to this day whenever the going gets rough.
You are in my thoughts, hang in there, you are a strong warrior! Just one more ridge! Annie

Songflower's picture
Songflower
Posts: 631
Joined: Apr 2009

Mary Ann,

I am so proud of you going to Yoga with a bad throat. I remember my tube in my throat and how much I hated it during surgery. I 'm with Ro, if you need pain meds take them! I am seeing a pain Doctor now and learning so much from her. She says you can't fight cancer if you are fighting pain. Pain meds work best if taken consistently for chronic pain. Your pain will most likely be chronic for a while before it gets better.

I am glad you are on FMLA. If you need to put your feet up you can.

Love you,
Diane

daisy366's picture
daisy366
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

Well, this cancer journey certainly can be fascinating. Since last week, things are so much better. I guess this could be considered a research project since the one constant was my treatments - weekly carboplatin and daily radiation to supraclavicular lymph nodes.

10 days ago I was miserable, scared, anxious, in pain, chakras from the heart up were closed. The radiation was burning my throat and I worried about suffocating, not being able to eat, etc. Today I am pain-free, more confident and calm. Yet the daily radiation continued. I even questioned the techs if they lowered the dose - no was the response.

As the week progressed my throat felt better. Today, Monday, I can swallow without problem. What changed?? In reflection, many things:
1) I have eliminated many stressors - work being the biggest.
2) I took the words of my doc to heart "You are having these negative symptoms too early!!" and got off my pity pot and went to healing session, yoga and healing touch. I heard words that helped me be more positive and not give in to FEAR. Francesca talked about the connection between the sacral chakra (the source of "Chester", the name I gave the papillary serous uterine cancer) and the throat chakra (the area of recurrence and the area of my current pain AND one of my personal challenges, SPEAKING UP FOR MYSELF and BEING HEARD!!). How profound to hear of the connection. She said that if we give in to defeat than we have lost (I know this but didn't practice it) and to profess intention to succeed with confidence. I participated in partnering exercises and started feeling better - like a wilted flower drinking in water. My healing touch session immediately followed and Barbara opened up my chakras. Again, feeling better in my throat. I believe I shifted from FEAR to FAITH and TRUST.
3) I was a better steward to my throat. Instead of denying I had a problem (eating whatever I wanted), I started babying my throat - gargling regularly with salt and baking soda mixture, eating soft foods in small portions, drinking from straw, cooling down my throat after treatments with ice-cold smoothie (yum).
4) the xanax? Didn't help - maybe too weak a dose (.25). So I can't credit this!
5) chia seeds. Francesca fed me these and said "this will draw the cancer right out of you!". I bought some. They are a strong anti-oxidant, higher than blueberries. I need to discuss this with my doc today if I should take now. But after treatment, for sure these will be my friend. Who can argue with those words, "this will take the cancer right out of you!"
6) My nurse told me to take it a week at a time. So I set my sights small. I am at the halfway point of treatment now and I just need to get through Friday.
7) visualization. In the radiation machine, I envision being comforted by Mary and protected by God. Mary is cradling me and has her hand over my throat. We are both in the hands of God who only lets in the radiation directed at the weakened cancer cells. The rays hit the mark and Chester dies. I repeat this before sleep and in morning.

It is only my thoughts and actions that have changed! So, my friends. Take flight - like Claudia's goose, Gwendolynne - with confidence and faith. I am flying through this journey one day at a time.

Love and blessings to you all. Mary Ann

upsofloating's picture
upsofloating
Posts: 473
Joined: Dec 2009

So great to read through your post Mary Ann! Allowing your mind to to open up to the positive energy and allow that to take charge of your body. An inspiring experience that you have shared to guide the rest of us. My positive thoughts are with you as well as you continue on your journey. --Annie

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Cecile Louise
Posts: 135
Joined: Dec 2009

Thank you so much for the update, Mary Ann. You’ve been in my thoughts and I'm so glad to year you're moving a bit more easily through this part of your journey. I love that you are being so kind to yourself - I love your ice-cold smoothies for your throat, your lovely imagery in the radiation machine, your participation in healing sessions, yoga and healing touch. Thank you for sharing – you’ve reminded me to be nicer to myself. May you continue feeling better, confident, calm and pain-free - and know that we are all sending you big, warm, positive thoughts to wrap around you.

Love,
Cecile

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jazzy1
Posts: 1385
Joined: Mar 2010

I'm so elated to hear you're doing better. Interesting how just changing our thoughts can affect us physically....I so believe this is true. You've been in my thoughts as well, remembering how you are a trooper changing your eating habits and becoming one big health nut.

Stress? I do know getting away from a stressful job will help. So much research on this too. Dr. Servan-Schreiber (The Anti Cancer book) research shows it's not just the stress, but more about our response to stress. As we try to regain control from stress (via yoga, etc) our body doesn't fight as much. The key he found is our powerlessness with no support during stressful times that doesn't help. Bottom line, during times of stress, find a "good" way to handle it -- yoga, meditation and support from others to hold our hands.

You're in my prayers and thoughts...keep doing what you're doing as you'll come thru this like a rose!!

Jan
:-)

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Mary Ann:

It is so nice to hear all of your positive thoughts and actions. I am so happy to hear you are feeling better.

Thank you for posting.

Hugs and Happiness to you!

Kathy

Ro10's picture
Ro10
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

I am so glad you are having a much better week. So glad you are taking so many positive steps to make you feel better. So glad the pain and swallowing are so much better. So glad you are half way through. May the next treatments continue to go well. You remain in my thoughts and prayers. In peace and caring.

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GracieGold
Posts: 23
Joined: Jun 2010

Mary Ann

I really enjoyed reading your post. Thank you for sharing the details of how you have been dealing with your treatments. It helps to know that we all have our ups and downs. And I love your insights and how you are dealing with the challenges. I googled chia seeds--they do sound like a power food. Any suggestions about how to use them?

Best wishes for you as you continue on this journey.

paris11
Posts: 159
Joined: Oct 2010

Hi Mary Ann,

Congrats on a successful transition. I am so happy for you. You will complete your flight successfully.

I, too, am focused on healing "to profess intention to succeed with confidence." I have added to "keep my labs up so that I will not have to delay treatment." I had accupuncture during chemo yesterday and I could absolutely SEE BRIGHT RED HEALTHY BLOOD COURSING THROUGH MY VEINS.

I have a scheduled Reiki treatment the day prior to my IP infusion and the day following my IP infusion.

I also spend much of the day in mediation and prayer.

I have completed 4 out of 6 IP/IV infusions. I have experienced no adverse side effects. I am fatigued on days 5 and 6. Sometimes my mind craves silence - no music - no reading - just silence. I have slowly moved to soft foods - mostly soup, yogurt, eggs, flax seed and oatmeal.

I am convinced that love and support, mediation, accupuncture, and reiki have been key to my success with IP/IV. I am compelled to also acknowledge an exceptional medical team and a committed and dedicated staff. We are both blessed.

Best love to you and to all the Warriors,

Connie

maggie_wilson's picture
maggie_wilson
Posts: 616
Joined: Nov 2009

mary ann,

it perked me right up to read your latest post; it seems so true to me that however one of us is doing affects us all. i can't tell you how happy i am to hear that you are feeing so much better--partly due to you "babying" your throat, partly due to so much less stress, partly due to your healers and the relationships you have with them, partly due to the body-mind connection and your insights, and partly due to the mystery at the heart of things.!! i sure do like faith and trust, though, alot better than fear, i know that. am intetrested in the chia seeds, and will check them out. are they like flax seeds, i wonder, that you can just toss on whatever you're eating? in any case, mary ann, keep healing and healing, feeling better and better, and before you know it, these treatments will be over.

thinking of you with only positive, heart warming thoughts.

sisterhood,
maggie

Always Hopeful
Posts: 234
Joined: May 2010

Dear Mary Ann,

Your visual of Mary protecting you during radiation is just beautiful!

One day at a time is what we all need to include in our mantra. My gyn onc always tells me, "one step at a time."

Keep the faith. My continued best wishes for you to be on an easy rode for the rest of these treatments.

Peace and hope, JJ

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daisy366
Posts: 1493
Joined: Mar 2009

I am almost finished with this treatment. It's been pretty challenging to say the least. Tuesday I will finally be finished with radiation - 35 tomo treatments. I finished my 7th chemo last Wed.

Toward the end of the week I am so fatigued and feel like I've been run over by a truck. that's how I was yesterday - today I am starting to rejuvenate. My neck is hot and red - skin thick, itchy, and nasty. My throat has been a trooper through this - not as bad as it was a month ago! I have managed well with ibuprofen for pain when needed.

I see radiologist Monday and will learn more about follow-up then. I imagine I will have a PET in a month or so. I'm looking forward to enjoying Thanksgiving - big time!! Have lots of treats lined up for myself.

Wishing you all many blessings, joy and peace. Mary Ann

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Mary Ann:

You are one trooper! I am glad you are almost finished with your treatment. Enjoy your Thanksgiving, especially knowing you are done with treatment by then!

Sending my best to you.

Kathy

Double Whammy's picture
Double Whammy
Posts: 2827
Joined: Jun 2010

I've been following your journey and am so happy you're doing so well. You will definitely have something to be thankful for this Thanksgiving. Please keep us posted about your progress.

Suzanne

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Mary Ann,

I am soooo happy to hear that you are ALMOST at the finish line AND that you are handling your treatments so well, even if they have been taxing! You are indeed an amazing warrior!

I can only imagine what you must have on your list for a Thanksgiving celebration....enjoy it to the utmost....you are so very deserving!!

Wishing you much joy AND a very long life NED!!

Big hugs! Karen

jazzy1's picture
jazzy1
Posts: 1385
Joined: Mar 2010

You know I was thinking about you yesterday .... wondering how you've been. I ditto a few others on this site -- YOU'RE A REAL TROOPER!!!!!!

I wish you the best in the world as you deserve it with all you've been thru. You're in my thoughts and prayers and do enjoy a few treats for Turkey Day!!!

Gooble-gobble!!!
Jan

Northwoodsgirl
Posts: 526
Joined: Oct 2009

Mary Ann,
I haven't been on the site for a while and am just getting caught up on how everyone is doing and seeing the new women who have joined our "club". I am sorry to hear that you are fighting a reoccurance. You have been through so much! I appreciate your perspective in how you are managing yourself in light of all the suffering you are undergoing. Just know that there are sooo many of us who are praying for you and sending love and strength to you for your recovery. Glad to see that you are doing better.
God bless you and keep you and may his face shine upon you and give you grace...
Lori

santefe55
Posts: 7
Joined: Mar 2009

Mary Ann has been in the hospital since Friday admitted with a fever. Doctors have not been able to determine the cause, and she was not doing well tonight: weak, confused, temperature of 101.9, throat pain related to the radiation treatments on her neck. Keep her in your prayers.

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Thank you, Santefe, for letting us know of Mary Ann's condition. We will definitely keep her in our prayers. Please let her know that everyone is asking about her.

california_artist's picture
california_artist
Posts: 865
Joined: Jan 2009

Tell her I love her. And Gwendolynee and I will be pulling for her and dreaming of a better future.

Claudia

Cindy Bear
Posts: 570
Joined: Jul 2009

I am so sorry to hear this latest development.. But thank you for letting us know. Let's hope it's just a little glitch and she'll be home soon. Mary Ann is such a kind, gentle, caring soul. I can just tell from her posts that she is a special person. I will be keeping her in my thoughts and prayers this weekend.

Always Hopeful
Posts: 234
Joined: May 2010

I am so upset. It just doesn't seem fair. Mary Ann was at the end of the treatment. She put up with so much pain and discomfort. Plese let her know we are all thinking of and praying for her. Also, please keep us updated.

Peace and hope, JJ

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Santefe, I was so sorry to hear the news about Mary Ann's setback. She is such a sweet, dear, calm, and level headed warrior....She had just completed her very taxing treatment...it just does not seem fair, does it?

Please know that I am sending her a BIG dose of positive energy and pray that she will soon be better!

Keep us posted on her progress and I am hopeful that they will soon find the cause of her fever, etc. and get that resolved...PRONTO!! I am not a patient person, and am counting on this getting resolved...FAST!!

Big HUGS!! Karen

Ro10's picture
Ro10
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

I hope Mary Ann is out of the hospital by now. I definitely will keep her in my prayers. She has had such a positive attitude through her difficult treatment. Hope they found the cause of her fever and she is feeling better. In peace and caring.

santefe55
Posts: 7
Joined: Mar 2009

Mary Ann was discharged from the hospital Wednesday. Doing better, but remains in significant pain from numerous canker sores in the mouth and throat burns, a side effect of 35 radiation treatments. Thanks for all the words of support

madhura
Posts: 21
Joined: Aug 2010

Good to know she is home.
Please convey my best wishes to her for a speedy recovery.

kkstef's picture
kkstef
Posts: 706
Joined: May 2008

Am so happy that Mary Ann is back home but it sounds like she is feeling very miserable. Am sending cooling energy to relieve that burned throat. Hopefully the pain will subside soon!

Sending love and caring thoughts!!

Karen

maggie_wilson's picture
maggie_wilson
Posts: 616
Joined: Nov 2009

i sure hope mary ann gets to have her thanksgiving treats, even if a little belatedly. so glad to hear she's better, and is at least at home. we're all rooting for her, and hopefully in a little while, this whole episode will just be a bad memory. in the meantime, best love to her.
sisterhood
maggie

Always Hopeful
Posts: 234
Joined: May 2010

So pleased to hear that Mary Ann is home. Sorry about the canker sores and throat burns...will pray it all improves soon. Prayers are coming her way for a quick recoup!

Peace and hope, JJ

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Mary Ann:

Thinking of you and I am glad you are back home from the hospital. Praying that your pain and sores will go away quickly.

Hugs and prayers to you!

Kathy

fuzzytrouble's picture
fuzzytrouble
Posts: 213
Joined: Feb 2009

Thinking of you sending good vibes and wishing you to get better from the radiation treatment. Radiation treatment does a job on the body, so it takes a bit of time to come back and I know you will get there faster.
Hugs for you from Oregon

Ro10's picture
Ro10
Posts: 1579
Joined: Jan 2009

Sorry to hear Mary Ann is having so much pain, and having canker sores. It sounds miserable. Since the radiation is completed, hopefully all that will clear up soon. Hope she can enjoy those cool smoothies. Did thy find the cause of her fever (was it all the inflammation in her throat?) Hope she feels better soon. In peace and caring.

jazzy1's picture
jazzy1
Posts: 1385
Joined: Mar 2010

Oh my gosh I've missed all this information. I hate to hear of any hospital stay, but so thankful she's doing better and at her own home.

Thanks again for keeping us posted...I'll keep checking in to see more updates.

Blessings to Mary Ann...
Jan

california_artist's picture
california_artist
Posts: 865
Joined: Jan 2009

I called her yesterday and she seemed her old self, all full of vim? and vinegar. Her voice is a bit raspy, but other than that she is in high spirits.

Can't begin to say how wonderful it was hear how well she was doing. I know she is near and dear to the original crew and some of the later joiners here.

Good news,

Claudia

Kaleena's picture
Kaleena
Posts: 1958
Joined: Nov 2009

Thanks, Claudia, on the update on Mary Ann. It is good to know she is feeling better and improving daily. We continue to pray for a speedy recovery.

Thanks for the good news,

Kathy

lindaprocopio's picture
lindaprocopio
Posts: 2022
Joined: Oct 2008

(((((Maryann))))). We're all rooting for you, and so glad you're back home.

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