CSN Login
Members Online: 2

You are here

Name something that gives you great comfort

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

Everyone here on the boards knows that there is great comfort in being able to share our journeys with others who are going through the same or very similar journeys. But at the end of the day, we still have those times when we wonder... "Do I really know what I'm going through here??" At those times, what do you do to ground yourself? In this "exercise", share with all of us something tangible that you touch, hug, look at that grounds you when you need grounding. It might be only one thing... then again, you might find you have multiple things that keep you going. The only rule to this exercise (rules, bloody rules! ) is that the thing you mention has to be tangible... something that if any of us were to come to your house, you would be able to show it to us :)

Ok... I'll start! For me, there's no doubt about it... it is my little diva dog, Bridget. She is a miniature schnauzer who turned 11 years old on November 11, 2008 and she is the apple of my eye. She knows when I just need snuggle time and other times she is super mischievious (loves to play "Chase ME!" in the apartment ;)

I have shed many tears over my DX and even more laughter... but through tears or laughter, my little Bridget has been with me all the way. She also has this way about her where, she will look at me with great understanding , give me 5 minutes of "It's all about YOU" time and then turn on a dime and insist "It's all about BRIDGET"... which cracks me up and brings me back to reality ;)

With Phil's help... he has shown me how I can insert a picture into this post... here's my darling Bridget who is the best emotional support a girl could wish for...

Huggggggggggs,

Cheryl

kimby's picture
kimby
Posts: 804
Joined: Oct 2007

Sonia,

I'm bumping this thread up to be sure you've seen it. We all have dark days no matter how upbeat or positive we are. Many of us have learned to cry in the shower to spare our families what we can. I have bad days and bad moments on good days. When this thread originated I was too sick to participate. I'm doing better now and maybe it will help us both.

Comfort is a strange thing that comes from strange places. It isn't the same as joy, but can facilitate moments of true joy. I have the best bathtub in the world. It is big, jetted (Jacuzzi)and I have bubbles, oils, smelly salts, candles, a stereo system, tv, stacks of books and magazines, catalogs at Christmas time, and sometimes a glass of wine. I have fibromyalsia and arthritis in my spine (I'm 45) so I developed my bath habit to help with pain management. Some days I take 2-3 hour baths! It cleanses my body and my soul.

You have to understand that I could never really take baths before - I couldn't sit still long enough. I have a pool and a hot tub that are full of family and friends all summer. I have the 'party' house because I love to have people around me all the time. I couldn't sit still and didnt spend time with ME. I am now a different person. I get comfort (and joy) from different sources now.

I hope you find your way. This thread is about tangible things and I'm only mentioning one of many. But truely, it's the intangibles that help the most and laughter is number ONE for me. Laughter gives me life and makes me want to live.

HTH,

Kimby

imgsrc=Photobucket

VickiCO's picture
VickiCO
Posts: 934
Joined: Oct 2008

I am happy you have your place of comfort. It looks so inviting. I am sorry you are having a rough time right now. Can you feel the hugs coming your way?

Thank you for sharing. Can I join you? Vicki

jenben59
Posts: 144
Joined: Jan 2009

You look comfortable even in the picture. It is very relaxing to me too.

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

thank you Kimby for such an honest wonderful post. It is hard and you are not having an easy time right now.

If Vicki is comin for tubbie time I want to come too. the tub looks big enough for at least 3 and the occasional glass of vino.

Thinking of you tonight

much love
mags

kimby's picture
kimby
Posts: 804
Joined: Oct 2007

Vicki and Mags are officially invited! I love a good party and will have the wine chilled. Lots of bubbles and hot water for such a cold spring.

Kimby

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

yippee there's nothing I like more than a party and hot water and now that you mention it a glass of cooool wine. I just watched Australia .....pretty good...a bit cheesy but good. We had about an inch of snow today but it is melting.

Sending double triple hugs....
I am so fed up up with chemo and feeling crappy tonight..

on WE go
mags

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

If we are having a hot tub party... ok, a bathtub party, then I wanna be counted in too :D Is this also a "Pets Optional" party?? I promise she will be good although, if she stays true to form and behaves like she has at any other party I've taken her to, the first thing she will do is case out your home and search for the master bedroom. It's one of the one oddities about my dog... she couldn't care less what was going on around her, she just insists that when it's bed time she knows where the biggest most comfortable bed is :)

Hahaha... so should we spread the word... "Party in Kimby's bathtub??" :)

And yes... Phil you MUST provide the music entertainment... and bring along the post-bath comforters!!

Ohhhh... and Shoppergal... little Chiquita sounds like a superdog!! If Kimby gives us the ok to bring pets, then you must bring Chiquita to the party too :)

Hahahaha... oh, I beez soooo bad!! This could have been a private party and I just jumped in and invited a whole bunch... oops, sorry, Kimby ;)

Huggggggs,

Cheryl

kimby's picture
kimby
Posts: 804
Joined: Oct 2007

You can have private parties? Never heard of such a thing! Of course you're invited. And, as the "mom" of 3 dogs I'd host a doggie party, too. I'll turn on my electric blanket to make my bed more inviting for them. I have the tub and a hot tub. I could open the pool and run the heater, but hubby might have a fit when the bill comes for that one! I have a couple of acres for the dogs and plenty of water to keep us entertained. Let's get the party rollling!

Kimby

VickiCO's picture
VickiCO
Posts: 934
Joined: Oct 2008

I don't think there is any such thing as a 'private' party on this list...nor should there be! We are all in this together.

Hey, I don't have a dog to bring! Our last few dogs were Great Pyrenees, and I don't think they would fit. But I can cuddle with your dogs! (Just don't tell Betty, my cat!)

See you at the tub....Vicki

kimby's picture
kimby
Posts: 804
Joined: Oct 2007

Great Pyrenees? Is that all you got? lol My 'puppy' is an English Mastiff and she's working on 200lbs. (both her parents are over that) We have room for any dogs you can borrow: big, small or in between!

Kimby

shoppergal
Posts: 118
Joined: Mar 2009

There's a few things that give me comfort. Of course the support of family and friends, but the one that was there no matter what, was always my little yorkie, Chiquita. Right before I was diagnosed, actually right before my first colonoscopy, she had gotten sick. We had just found out that she was diabetic and had cushings disease. We had started her on insulin shots and some meds for the cushings.She had a bad reaction to the cushings meds and we had to hospitalize her the weekend that I was waiting for the biopsy results from my first colonoscopy. I remember going to the hospital to see her, they let me sit in a room and hold her in my arms. She was so sick that I thought we were going to lose her, and I wasn't sure I would be able to deal with cancer if I lost her. Thankfully she got better, and she was always next to me when I was at my worst.Animals are the best comfort, they can always tell when your not at your best and they are always there to put a smile on your face! Another great comfort for me was going to work. I'm a hairdresser and I work in a children's hair salon. I had to cut back on my hours and I took taxi's back and forth to work, so I really wasn't making alot of money, but the kids were great at helping me forget for just a few hours what I was going thru. All of you that have young children or grandchildren know just what I mean! Even though my son is grown, he's 32, he still gives me alot of pleasure and comfort, but unfortunately he lives in Co and I'm in NY so I don't see him often enough.Comfort for me is being able to go on this site and others like this and knowing that you all understand what I've gone thru and continue to go thru. For that I would like to thank you all!

PhillieG's picture
PhillieG
Posts: 4907
Joined: May 2005

A Great Comforter and humor in the face of tumors.
Ya gotta laugh at things

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

yes you do Philly....laughter is the best. Maybe you could come to Kimby's party and provide live rockin music?

Do you like Bob Dylan???

mags

PhillieG's picture
PhillieG
Posts: 4907
Joined: May 2005

Our first born son is named Dylan, after the Man!
I only saw him in concert once, back in '75 at the Garden... great show

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

just a brief diversion here....you don't mind do you sweetie?

wow you saw The Man and your son is actually called Dylan.....that is so cool.
I must have listened to Blonde on Blonde 90 gizillion times and where are you tonight sweet Marie?? rleased May 1966...oh dear where does the time go?

mags

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

Hahaha Mags... no problem on the diversions... diversions can be great comfort!!

I have never seen Dylan in concert... but on a totally different slant, do I get Brownie points for being able to count Long John Baldy (RIP) as a friend of mine? I had the honour on numerous occasions to be able to hear his stories. The man was such a legend and he had stories that the rest of us could only dream of... yet he took them and his fame in his stride. I miss him... but his music will live on forever!!

Reminiscing,

Cheryl

Mike49's picture
Mike49
Posts: 269
Joined: Nov 2008

Comfort comes from several sources for me. My wife Jenny has been as solid as a rock and if she can be, she's there for as many treatments as possible. As a caregiver, she is remarkable. She did my dressing changes for 5 or six weeks when I had a wound infection and i am not talking small infection, you could put your hand in this thing, that's how big it was, she nursed me ( and yes she is a RN) back to health and ready for chemo. The scar is so minimal you can hardly tell there was an infection.. It can't of been easy, sometimes it hurt like hell, I wonder if I could be that strong if the shoes were reversed.

My kids are a great source of normalcy, they know dad's got cancer, my 12 year old has stepped up in ways that I notice and admire. My ten year old is a source of great joy, he has a way with words that cracks me up. I have a seven year old stepdaughter who probably doesn't realize the cancer theme so much but she is another source of joy. I can't forget the two dogs, Mr.Bo Jangles and Penny. When I had my port put in, I slept or tried too most of the afternoon in discomfort. Once when I woke up, I found every dog toy was laid on top or beside me, Little Bo didn't know what was wrong but he thought his toys would help. They are both dog's from the shelter who found a home with us.

I also find that this cancer battle makes me appreciate things around me more. The other day I heard the sound of a bird's song and stopped to listen and watch, I don't think I would have done that last year.

PhillieG's picture
PhillieG
Posts: 4907
Joined: May 2005

Your words, "I also find that this cancer battle makes me appreciate things around me more. The other day I heard the sound of a bird's song and stopped to listen and watch, I don't think I would have done that last year." ring so true for me too. I will pull over to watch the sunrise or sunset. I almost always have my camera with me and I will stop, turn around or whatever it takes to absorb the moment. As much as cancer sucks, there are good things that can come out of it if you take the time like you do to notice them.

I pulled over the other morning to capture this foggy sunrise.
Sun trying to peek through the morning fog

This is called a Circumhorizon Arc that I saw in July of 2007
Circumhorizon arc

This is a Sun Dog, I see them a few time a week in the morning or late afternoon sky.
It's amazing how many people never see these yet they are always there.
You just have to take the time to look
Sundogs

This is a great site for Atmospheric Optics and other cool stuff. Please check it out, you'll see amazing stuff.
-phil

PS: I agree with the kid parts too, without mine I don't think I'd have made it this far. And my wife too...

Mike49's picture
Mike49
Posts: 269
Joined: Nov 2008

Phil, I lived in Alaska for many years but left about six years ago. I remember those sun dogs on clear cold early spring days. I enjoyed your pictures very much. I use to travel alot in the north and visited Canada, BC and Alberta mostly often. I admire the Canadian Health Care System and the commitment of your citizens to providing this benefit to all.

Your an inspiration to me, I am only about 8 months into my fight, but I admire the strength and outlook you have. I also love the blues.

MIke

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

ahhh Mike that is such a beautiful post. I love the story of the dog toys...that is so wonderful ....bless Little Bo's heart.

I think you are right about stopping and listening too. I live in Canada and we are just starting to thaw. Every robin's song makes me stop and listen....she sings....cheer up cheer up. I could not have come this far without my husband either.....he is a rock

thanks Mike
mags

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

ahhh Mike that is such a beautiful post. I love the story of the dog toys...that is so wonderful ....bless Little Bo's heart.

I think you are right about stopping and listening too. I live in Canada and we are just starting to thaw. Every robin's song makes me stop and listen....she sings....cheer up cheer up. I could not have come this far without my husband either.....he is a rock

thanks Mike
mags

kimby's picture
kimby
Posts: 804
Joined: Oct 2007

I see things I never saw before, hear birds, enjoy watching the birds and squirrels feed, laugh/smile at little kids throwing tantrums in the store....I can find humor or joy in many little things.

I just read a quote from Michael J. Fox that I really like: "For everything this disease has taken, something of greater value has been given--sometimes just a marker that points me in a new direction that I might not otherwise have traveled."

And, canzer still sucks!

Kimby

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

Excellent post, Mike!! It's soooo true.... sometimes it's not earth shattering great things that give us comfort. It's the small, every day things in life that either we didn't really pay attention to them before, or we just took them for granted because they are always there and there was no reason to suspect they wouldn't be. For those of you who have children, I'm sure there are days when you ask yourselves "WHY did we have kids??" , but all it takes is a bout of cancer and even when they are testing you, you see the wonder and magic that comes with bringing these little beings into the world and watching them grow towards adulthood.

Like you, Phil and Mags... it's the small things that I've always taken for granted that now I see with new eyes. For instance, I live across the street from the beach (English Bay). It is a very protected bay, so is calm.. but is also a huge entrance way to Vancouver's ports, so lots of ship traffic comes through, or docks in the bay. I've always enjoyed living across from the beach, but because it's always there, I never "really" see it.

One day last week, we had one of those spring winds... where it's windy all day... a real chilly north wind. I noticed the bay was so different... almost violent because of the wind. So I took my camera outside and took a picture from across the street:

Ok... and since I'm in the mode of adding pictures, here's probably the passion that keeps me going no matter how I'm feeling! You've all heard me talk about my love for my theatre involvement and how I spend my days at the theatre office. This is a year-round operation although the shows we do are at an outdoor theatre so are only running in the summer months. Here is a rehearsal shot, at night, at our wonderful outdoor theatre:

And, as I mentioned in the first post of this topic... my little darling miniature schnauzer, Bridget. In this picture, I had not gotten her hair cut for the summer because she is with me day and night and the evenings can get a little chilly once the sun goes down. So she looks like an orphan dog (this year she will be groomed and sporting a summer hair-do). But in this picture, she is all for helping the guys set up the sound towers LOL!:

Life is good! Happiness is good! Life and Happiness = Comfort :)

Huggggggs,

Cheryl

jenben59
Posts: 144
Joined: Jan 2009

especially the theatre. I love the theatre and have absolutely no talent in the arts. Post all the pictures you'd like...I look at all of them. Hope you are doing well and I do appreciate all the posts with important and "experienced" information. you're great.

maglets's picture
maglets
Posts: 2596
Joined: Jun 2006

ahhh look what happened to my happy shed yesterday....big storm. Guess I won't be doing my infusion recovery there this week :):)

where is spring

snow>

dixchi's picture
dixchi
Posts: 438
Joined: Jun 2008

yep, Mother Nature is doing us in here in Cincy.....tried to cover
some daffodils with grocery sacks yesterday and that didn't work....
crabapple trees and viburnums have buds that I am hoping don;t
get nipped.....MN is moody this year!

Barbara

robinvan's picture
robinvan
Posts: 1014
Joined: May 2007

Sorry to here about your spring snowfall!!

Here's my "happy shed". It helps me get around Vancouver on those really bad chemo days!!

Rob; in Vancouver (*)

"Yesterday I decided to go to the office. I got as far as the bedroom door. Chemo strikes." Peter Jennings

CherylHutch's picture
CherylHutch
Posts: 1399
Joined: Apr 2007

So that is YOU I see on your little shed scooter, scooting about the West End!! Hahahahaha!! That is so darn funny, Rob!! Gee... it looks just the right width that you can ride it around the seawall and would never have to stop for those uh... er... chemo breaks :D

LOL!!!

Cheryl

angelsbaby's picture
angelsbaby
Posts: 1171
Joined: May 2008

Haley is seven smart as a whip a couple of years ago she becames sick all her joints hurted 6 months of crap test from pedetrition I set the app for the rumatoide dr and sure enough she has jra in more then 30 joints has been on enbrel shot once a week and methotr something its a chemo drug once a week but my joy comes from her dancing and doing the hula hoop and just being able to move really. shes a trooper never really complains but i know she must be in pain. I love her so much She would like to be a balerina dancer i said you go for it.

michelle

Kathleen808's picture
Kathleen808
Posts: 2361
Joined: Jan 2009

Children are a beautiful joy! I am a kindergarten teacher (and mom) and I agree that watching kids dance is fabulous. Our younger daughter has special needs and I know what you mean about watching a child who might appear to have something working against them. Kids just go for each and don't see the limitations.
Also, I want to let you know that friends of ours have a son who had a tough time with jra from 5 years old to about 12 and now he has grown out of it. He is a great soccer player. Keep up the hope for little Haley. :)
Thinking about you and Angel.
Aloha,
Kathleen

angelsbaby's picture
angelsbaby
Posts: 1171
Joined: May 2008

Thank you so much for the info about your friends son I hope that will be haley to. I will be posting soon about angel I know alot of people here are concerned about angel and myself really angel and how he is doing, Thanks again kathleen

michelle

PS Angel is getting sicker

Pages

Subscribe to Comments for "Name something that gives you great comfort"