the beast is back again...

zinaida
zinaida Member Posts: 221
edited March 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1
Ct scan show again 5 spots in pelvis area, but bigger in sizes from 0.5 to 2cm. I wonder if last chemo, 6 month ago, did kill them at all. I not think so. They probably was going dormant for a while and than start grow again, January 13 I will know what next treatment wiil be. In mean time I'm so angry. I angry with all world. I fight with every one and very unhappy about myself doing it.(((HUGS))),Zina.
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Comments

  • Hissy_Fitz
    Hissy_Fitz Member Posts: 1,834
    #2
    So sorry, Zin. This is
    So sorry, Zin. This is indeed a beast we are fighting. I hate it. Put on your big girl panties and get ready for the next round. It hasn't won yet. There is plenty of fight left in you.

    Carlene
  • zinaida
    zinaida Member Posts: 221
    #3
    Hissy_Fitz said:

    So sorry, Zin. This is
    So sorry, Zin. This is indeed a beast we are fighting. I hate it. Put on your big girl panties and get ready for the next round. It hasn't won yet. There is plenty of fight left in you.

    Carlene

    Thanks, Carliene! I just
    Thanks, Carliene! I just need to find my big girl panties, I think I lost them some where! :)
  • Sandy10
    Sandy10 Member Posts: 80
    #4
    So Sorry Zina!!!!!! But
    So Sorry Zina!!!!!! But carlene is right!! there is plenty of fight left!!!! Look around and find those panties!! :) Take your anger out on the cancer. STUPID CANCER!!!! KICK ITS A$$!!!!!!! we are here with you!! ((((HUGS))))

    Sandy
  • Cindy Bear
    Cindy Bear Member Posts: 569
    #5
    Hang in there
    I am so sorry to hear this Zina.. that's what this sucky disease does.. it keeps coming back like Michael Myers from those Halloween movies.. you just can't kill the b*stard. I think anger and frustration and fear and all those things are perfectly normal. Go ahead and cry and swear and throw things.. Then find those Big Girl Panties and put em on. Good luck and Hugs, Cindy
  • nancy591
    nancy591 Member Posts: 1,027 Member
    #6
    so sorry!
    So sorry Zina!!!
  • clamryn
    clamryn Member Posts: 508
    #7
    Hit that beast with all you got
    Zina, I am so sorry. Just hit the beast and hit it hard. Hit it for me too. I hate this stupid disease.

    My cancer has grown since I have been on my chemo break and I can't even start up again until I get rid of these stupid shingles that I got. I believe I got the shingles because of dealing with the insurance company and trying to get my chemo covered. The stress of it all.

    You hang in there Zina. Heck, I will hold the beast and you can kick the s**t of it.

    HUGS to you.

    Linda
  • zinaida
    zinaida Member Posts: 221
    #8
    clamryn said:

    Hit that beast with all you got
    Zina, I am so sorry. Just hit the beast and hit it hard. Hit it for me too. I hate this stupid disease.

    My cancer has grown since I have been on my chemo break and I can't even start up again until I get rid of these stupid shingles that I got. I believe I got the shingles because of dealing with the insurance company and trying to get my chemo covered. The stress of it all.

    You hang in there Zina. Heck, I will hold the beast and you can kick the s**t of it.

    HUGS to you.

    Linda

    Thanks Linda! Let's do it,
    Thanks Linda! Let's do it, let's kick it out from ours body. My teal sisters, May God help us to survive?! (((HUGS))), Zina
  • kayandok
    kayandok Member Posts: 1,202 Member
    #9
    Dear Zina,
    I'm so sorry to hear that, and I understand the anger. Try to channel the anger into fighting the disease, not the people who are around you, though.
    Hugs,
    kathleen❤
  • Lisa13Q
    Lisa13Q Member Posts: 677
    #10
    So sorry
    I hate this disease...Zinaida and I understand your anger...Now take that anger and fight like hell!!
  • VictoriaSF
    VictoriaSF Member Posts: 165
    #11
    so sorry
    so sorry Zina
    but i am sure you can fight it, you are strong Ukrainian woman, just like i am.
    bud zdorova! vsyo budet horosho!

    Victoria
  • zinaida
    zinaida Member Posts: 221
    #12
    VictoriaSF said:

    so sorry
    so sorry Zina
    but i am sure you can fight it, you are strong Ukrainian woman, just like i am.
    bud zdorova! vsyo budet horosho!

    Victoria

    Hello Victoria!Sorry we have
    Hello Victoria!Sorry we have to meet this way. I hope you will have your treatments soon. It is not so critical if you have some delay with start. Most important you will be strong after surgery and every thing will set up right way, so when you will start your treatments it is will be by schedule and with out delay, Good luck with your treatments. (((HUGS))), Zina P.S.Вита! Мой английский не очень хороший и чтобы что-то написать я сижу со словарем долгое время прежде чем я могу что-то пустить в пост. Если у вас есть возможность выйти на одноклассники - мое имя Зина Файфор ,то мы сможем пообщаться на русском, а то здесь неудобно писать по русски чтобы не обижать девчат.
  • VictoriaSF
    VictoriaSF Member Posts: 165
    #13
    zinaida said:

    Hello Victoria!Sorry we have
    Hello Victoria!Sorry we have to meet this way. I hope you will have your treatments soon. It is not so critical if you have some delay with start. Most important you will be strong after surgery and every thing will set up right way, so when you will start your treatments it is will be by schedule and with out delay, Good luck with your treatments. (((HUGS))), Zina P.S.Вита! Мой английский не очень хороший и чтобы что-то написать я сижу со словарем долгое время прежде чем я могу что-то пустить в пост. Если у вас есть возможность выйти на одноклассники - мое имя Зина Файфор ,то мы сможем пообщаться на русском, а то здесь неудобно писать по русски чтобы не обижать девчат.

    thanks for reply
    hi Zina,
    thank you for reply and support.
    i will keep posted on my chemo status and progress.

    p.s - ya napisala vam soobsheniye na odnoklassniki

    will chat later
    bestt
    Victoria
  • msfanciful
    msfanciful Member Posts: 559
    #14
    So sorry,
    I've been in
    So sorry,

    I've been in remission now for 3 times now since being diagnosed in 2007. It seemed like this just happened yesterday and sometimes this new journey seems sooo surreal. Just one of the manifestations of dealing/living with cancer.

    You have every right to be angry but eventually I hope and pray that the anger passes first; to be chronically angry (with cancer) definitely will not help you to heal any better (stress is the factor here).
    Secondly; To halt your life any longer with anger is allowing cancer to take over your spirit.

    Be angry, but let it be a process and focus your precious energy on fighting to survive and to live.

    I look as everyday I'm living is a closer step and hope that I'm getting closer to a better treatment/ and or cure.

    Sharon
  • Mwee
    Mwee Member Posts: 1,338
    #15
    zinaida said:

    Thanks Linda! Let's do it,
    Thanks Linda! Let's do it, let's kick it out from ours body. My teal sisters, May God help us to survive?! (((HUGS))), Zina

    Dear Zina
    Yes... let's kick this beast's butt! I'm so sorry that find yourself having to fight like this again, but I know you can do it.
    (((HUGS))) to you.... Maria
  • zinaida
    zinaida Member Posts: 221
    #16
    msfanciful said:

    So sorry,
    I've been in
    So sorry,

    I've been in remission now for 3 times now since being diagnosed in 2007. It seemed like this just happened yesterday and sometimes this new journey seems sooo surreal. Just one of the manifestations of dealing/living with cancer.

    You have every right to be angry but eventually I hope and pray that the anger passes first; to be chronically angry (with cancer) definitely will not help you to heal any better (stress is the factor here).
    Secondly; To halt your life any longer with anger is allowing cancer to take over your spirit.

    Be angry, but let it be a process and focus your precious energy on fighting to survive and to live.

    I look as everyday I'm living is a closer step and hope that I'm getting closer to a better treatment/ and or cure.

    Sharon

    Sharon, thanks! Sharon you
    Sharon, thanks! Sharon you are one of many woman here with such good heart,smart and kind. I just love your smile and attitude. Thanks again and I hope better treatments for us will come soon. (((HUGS))), Zina.
  • kayandok
    kayandok Member Posts: 1,202 Member
    #17
    msfanciful said:

    So sorry,
    I've been in
    So sorry,

    I've been in remission now for 3 times now since being diagnosed in 2007. It seemed like this just happened yesterday and sometimes this new journey seems sooo surreal. Just one of the manifestations of dealing/living with cancer.

    You have every right to be angry but eventually I hope and pray that the anger passes first; to be chronically angry (with cancer) definitely will not help you to heal any better (stress is the factor here).
    Secondly; To halt your life any longer with anger is allowing cancer to take over your spirit.

    Be angry, but let it be a process and focus your precious energy on fighting to survive and to live.

    I look as everyday I'm living is a closer step and hope that I'm getting closer to a better treatment/ and or cure.

    Sharon

    I love
    the way you put such a positive spin the anger issue we all deal with! Very well put, Sharon. You are an inspiration!!!
    k❥
  • Cafewoman53
    Cafewoman53 Member Posts: 735 Member
    #18
    Did you find your big girl
    Did you find your big girl pants? I might have borrowed them for a moment, This disease just has to rear it's ugly head to let us know it is still here but you will prevail with your Dr to beat it down !
    Good Luck
    Colleen
  • mopar
    mopar Member Posts: 1,972 Member
    #19
    Cafewoman53 said:

    Did you find your big girl
    Did you find your big girl pants? I might have borrowed them for a moment, This disease just has to rear it's ugly head to let us know it is still here but you will prevail with your Dr to beat it down !
    Good Luck
    Colleen

    ZINA
    Count me in with the other ladies - so sorry to hear that you're dealing with this again, but focus on using your strength to fight and recover. Still lots of fight left in you, so I'll send lots of prayers and hugs to help out!

    Monika
  • srwruns
    srwruns Member Posts: 343
    #20
    This news is very difficult
    This news is very difficult to hear. I do hope the next round of treatment will be effective and you will be on the mend. Stay strong, Susan
  • zinaida
    zinaida Member Posts: 221
    #21
    srwruns said:

    This news is very difficult
    This news is very difficult to hear. I do hope the next round of treatment will be effective and you will be on the mend. Stay strong, Susan

    Thanks my teal sisters for
    Thanks my teal sisters for your respond! I will see gyn/onc january,13; she will let me know her plans for treatments. I did make app. for second opinion whith gyn/onc from cancer center in Madison,WI. for january,14. I will have more options for treatments, may be? Love you all, Zina.

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