scared and worried
I guess I'm just looking for someone out there that is in the same situation as me to help me get thru this. This roller coaster ride of the breast cancer journey has just begun for me and I'm not liking it very much!
Denise
Comments
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Hi Denise, I'm so sorry you
Hi Denise, I'm so sorry you have to find us, but you'll be glad you did. I was exactly where you are this time last year. It's so hard not to know anything concrete and it is a very scary time. I went from just needing lumpectomy and radiation to needing chemo and radiation. It takes a while for all the doctors to decide what treatment should be. As you will find out, we are all different and have different issues but keep posting, as someone will be able to help each step of the way. Warmest thoughts coming your way.0 -
I am on that boat
Hello Denise,
My name is Ayse and I was diagnosed 11/23/09 with breast cancer, stage II, grade III and like you
ER and PR negative. I was lucky, in that my gynecologist whom I showed my lump during
my annual check up, reacted really fast. Before I knew, I had mammogram, then a needle
biopsy etc... within a week from my diagnosis I had a Lumpectomy. The first few weeks were
the first but once I started my treatment my focus shifted and I experienced less anxiety.
I had a wonderful surgeon, I knew the minute I met him thatI wanted him to guide me through
my journey. He sat down and gave me a crash course in cancer, drawing pictures and all, for
over 2 hours. We cried and laughed together. And he explained my pathology reports to me.
I had a second Lumpectomy within a week from my first, since my surgeon did not get clear
margins. Then I had about 3 weeks to process this whirlwind of information. And on to the
next surgery for my port. I decided to get one, since I would get Herceptin for a year. It's true
this type of cancer has a higher recurrence rate, but we also have Herceptin which proved to
be very effective.
January 25th, I started chemo. It was a scary time. And if you can, take someone with you the
first time,it really helps. Also make yourself a designated chemo bag. Put a favorite blanket in
it, gum or hard candy, for the weird taste you get your mouth. And anything else that makes you
happy, music, books , your laptop, diary... whatever helps you escape. Then I had some time and
in May I decided to get a mastectomy, instead of radiation. I met with a radiologist and made my
decision. These decisions are very personal and I did what gave me peace of mind.
I had my reconstruction and even nipples since. And am almost done with chemo. I had mentioned
this before but for me personally the emotion stress was harder than the physical. My dear friend
Renee put it really well when she said, she felt like her body was assaulted. It takes time to heal
physically and mentally. I hope you have a few really good friends and family to help you through
this time. But this site was the biggest help for me. I found more understanding here than anywhere
else. So when everything gets scary just come here and spill you beans and you will be amazed of
the support you will find here.
Sorry this turned out to be a novel but I just wanted to welcome you and let you know that you can
do it, and that we are all here for you. I am glad you found us at beginning of your journey.
Hugs,
Ayse0 -
Breast cancer is not oneaysemari said:I am on that boat
Hello Denise,
My name is Ayse and I was diagnosed 11/23/09 with breast cancer, stage II, grade III and like you
ER and PR negative. I was lucky, in that my gynecologist whom I showed my lump during
my annual check up, reacted really fast. Before I knew, I had mammogram, then a needle
biopsy etc... within a week from my diagnosis I had a Lumpectomy. The first few weeks were
the first but once I started my treatment my focus shifted and I experienced less anxiety.
I had a wonderful surgeon, I knew the minute I met him thatI wanted him to guide me through
my journey. He sat down and gave me a crash course in cancer, drawing pictures and all, for
over 2 hours. We cried and laughed together. And he explained my pathology reports to me.
I had a second Lumpectomy within a week from my first, since my surgeon did not get clear
margins. Then I had about 3 weeks to process this whirlwind of information. And on to the
next surgery for my port. I decided to get one, since I would get Herceptin for a year. It's true
this type of cancer has a higher recurrence rate, but we also have Herceptin which proved to
be very effective.
January 25th, I started chemo. It was a scary time. And if you can, take someone with you the
first time,it really helps. Also make yourself a designated chemo bag. Put a favorite blanket in
it, gum or hard candy, for the weird taste you get your mouth. And anything else that makes you
happy, music, books , your laptop, diary... whatever helps you escape. Then I had some time and
in May I decided to get a mastectomy, instead of radiation. I met with a radiologist and made my
decision. These decisions are very personal and I did what gave me peace of mind.
I had my reconstruction and even nipples since. And am almost done with chemo. I had mentioned
this before but for me personally the emotion stress was harder than the physical. My dear friend
Renee put it really well when she said, she felt like her body was assaulted. It takes time to heal
physically and mentally. I hope you have a few really good friends and family to help you through
this time. But this site was the biggest help for me. I found more understanding here than anywhere
else. So when everything gets scary just come here and spill you beans and you will be amazed of
the support you will find here.
Sorry this turned out to be a novel but I just wanted to welcome you and let you know that you can
do it, and that we are all here for you. I am glad you found us at beginning of your journey.
Hugs,
Ayse
Breast cancer is not one size fits all. Its a good/news bad news type of situation. Treatment is doable. and many people in all stages and agressive /non aggressive can survive. For me I try to address the cancer from the standpoint of what it is, determines what treatment I need.Not how I am going to do. so although unfortunately, you may need chemo, but it will greatly increase your chances of not having to deal with this again. I had a cancer that was favorable in its classic form but of course I had to have the more aggressive form of that which was not as favorable. good news bad news. anyway many people are in this situation. So dont surf the web, because it isnt helpful. Talk to people who are knowlegable.0 -
one Denise to another Denise
I have not been through...sorry you are going through this.....I'll keep good thoughts going your way0 -
I know that this bc journeycarkris said:Breast cancer is not one
Breast cancer is not one size fits all. Its a good/news bad news type of situation. Treatment is doable. and many people in all stages and agressive /non aggressive can survive. For me I try to address the cancer from the standpoint of what it is, determines what treatment I need.Not how I am going to do. so although unfortunately, you may need chemo, but it will greatly increase your chances of not having to deal with this again. I had a cancer that was favorable in its classic form but of course I had to have the more aggressive form of that which was not as favorable. good news bad news. anyway many people are in this situation. So dont surf the web, because it isnt helpful. Talk to people who are knowlegable.
I know that this bc journey is scary, and, nothing is for certain. But, please wait until after your surgery and you get the path report before getting too anxious. Whatever treatment your oncologist recommends will be the best for you and will be fighting the beast. We will be here for you to help however we can.
Hugs, Jan0 -
scared and worried
Dear Denise,I know just exactly how you feel right now I have also been where you are going and it is scarey and you do worry, mostly about the unknown. This past Friday I just completed one year and three months of Chemo and Radiation. I too was scared but I knew I couldn't undo what was and what was going to happen.I fretted for about two weeks over my diagnosis and then Denise I owned it and I claimed it and then I turned it over to God, it was just to big for me. When my Surgeon told me that I had Stage II Her2 Positive Breast cancer and it was a very aggresive cancer I did not have a clue what any of that meant, they immediately set me up for surgery and the good news was that they removed 15 lymph nodes from under my arm and I did not have any cancer in that area and that sounded good and then he told me that they would be useing three different Chemos on me and it was going to be a rough ride, and it was and many times I wanted to stop the Chemo and my family would not allow it, so you stay strong Denise no matter how rough the journey gets, trust me you will come out with the Victory. I feel brand new today, I'm minus a boob and I don't have a hair on my head and that doesn't matter I just want to run and dance and shout it out that I have the Victory, that hair will grow back one day.I will be thinking about you tomorrow and talking to God throughout the day about you,I will ask him to send his angels to surround you and to guide the Surgeons hands that he will get all that horrible ole cancer out of your body and then you can start the healing process. I also took Herceptin along with the Chemo.Denise once you get home and you feel the need to talk, I'm sending my e-mail address so you feel free to contact me. My name is Dot and my e-mail address is DFWTEXAS@PRODIGY.NET0 -
The website is awesome...
I will certainly be thinking of you Tuesday....
I read more than I post ~ and wanted you to know that I am so right there with you. I don't have a nail left on my fingers ;-). Waiting is the hardest for me. I too was seen very quickly after my PC found the lump. I had surgery within 3 wks of the discovery. I totally trust my surgeon - who at first, thought I might only need radiation. Yet, after surgery, found that I'm Stage II, Grade 3, 2.2cm and will need chemo. Now that I've had all of the CT scans, ultrasound, echocardio and bone scan - a cyst on my ovary was found, as well as a couple of spots on my lungs; therefore, I'll meet tomorrow to find out next steps.
This whole process is a true world wind and I'm glad to know we have each other to come to - to ask questions, to vent, to cry and certainly - for a well needed laugh at times.
Please know that you are certainly not alone in this process and I'm here reading and asking as many questions as I can remember. I've found this support group to be an awesome resource who do not mind sharing any and all details to help one another.
Faith will bring us through this - in the words of many 'experts' on this site... One Day at a Time.
LVG0 -
Hi Denise,
I hear you.. I'm
Hi Denise,
I hear you.. I'm scared and worried too and surely not liking it one bit! My 2nd pre-surgery appt. is this Wed. and will probably have surgery soon. I haven't been admitting to anyone that I'm scared. In fact, I just started feeling trepidation this weekend and I'm not sure who I would tell, other than the people here. Anyway my tumor is some mysterious thing that is not "usual breast cancer," either, and is ER pos, PR neg and HER2 neg. I think that HER2 treatment is supposed to be quite effective. However, we are ALL individual cases, and statistics mean next to NOTHING, because, how do we know where we'd score in any scenario? So don't stress over the unknown. There is only one way to approach this punch we've been thrown, and that is the positive way. (This helps me, while I write you.) I hope you'll post again and let us know how it went and how you're doing. Big hug, Lin0 -
Er Pr Her 2 PosLVG said:The website is awesome...
I will certainly be thinking of you Tuesday....
I read more than I post ~ and wanted you to know that I am so right there with you. I don't have a nail left on my fingers ;-). Waiting is the hardest for me. I too was seen very quickly after my PC found the lump. I had surgery within 3 wks of the discovery. I totally trust my surgeon - who at first, thought I might only need radiation. Yet, after surgery, found that I'm Stage II, Grade 3, 2.2cm and will need chemo. Now that I've had all of the CT scans, ultrasound, echocardio and bone scan - a cyst on my ovary was found, as well as a couple of spots on my lungs; therefore, I'll meet tomorrow to find out next steps.
This whole process is a true world wind and I'm glad to know we have each other to come to - to ask questions, to vent, to cry and certainly - for a well needed laugh at times.
Please know that you are certainly not alone in this process and I'm here reading and asking as many questions as I can remember. I've found this support group to be an awesome resource who do not mind sharing any and all details to help one another.
Faith will bring us through this - in the words of many 'experts' on this site... One Day at a Time.
LVG
I did the whole package. Lumpectomy,Chemo,Rads, herceptin, Lost Hair. There were days that were not so good and there were days that were ok. Get yourself good antinausea drug to have on hand if needed. Everyone is different. Not everyone has a problem with treatment.At the start of it all I could not see how I was ever going to get through all that treatment. We do it, we get through it, its doable. We help each other. I had help, and you will have help, and thats how we get it done.
Kathy ~0 -
ThanksFindingout said:Hi Denise,
I hear you.. I'm
Hi Denise,
I hear you.. I'm scared and worried too and surely not liking it one bit! My 2nd pre-surgery appt. is this Wed. and will probably have surgery soon. I haven't been admitting to anyone that I'm scared. In fact, I just started feeling trepidation this weekend and I'm not sure who I would tell, other than the people here. Anyway my tumor is some mysterious thing that is not "usual breast cancer," either, and is ER pos, PR neg and HER2 neg. I think that HER2 treatment is supposed to be quite effective. However, we are ALL individual cases, and statistics mean next to NOTHING, because, how do we know where we'd score in any scenario? So don't stress over the unknown. There is only one way to approach this punch we've been thrown, and that is the positive way. (This helps me, while I write you.) I hope you'll post again and let us know how it went and how you're doing. Big hug, Lin
Thanks everyone. You are ALL so caring and wonderful. It's good to know that everyone here knows exactly how everyone else feels. I cried and was grateful for all the words of encouragement and prayers that you girls are all giving to me. I'm trying to take it one step at a time. That's my mantra, but as you all know it is SO hard. Just being able to talk and tell everyone her your fears is a tremendous help!!
I do feel really "p,,,'off though because my son is getting married in July and now I have to fight this ugly thing instead of concentrating on the happy time it should be.My immediate family (husband, kids, sisterand brother)have been very supportive and that helps,but I can't help worrying
Denise0 -
Hello Jansurvivorbc09 said:I know that this bc journey
I know that this bc journey is scary, and, nothing is for certain. But, please wait until after your surgery and you get the path report before getting too anxious. Whatever treatment your oncologist recommends will be the best for you and will be fighting the beast. We will be here for you to help however we can.
Hugs, Jan
I know, my Doctor said everything depends upon the pathology reports after surgery,but it is really hard not to worry.
Denise0 -
stay positivepbrndm5 said:Thanks
Thanks everyone. You are ALL so caring and wonderful. It's good to know that everyone here knows exactly how everyone else feels. I cried and was grateful for all the words of encouragement and prayers that you girls are all giving to me. I'm trying to take it one step at a time. That's my mantra, but as you all know it is SO hard. Just being able to talk and tell everyone her your fears is a tremendous help!!
I do feel really "p,,,'off though because my son is getting married in July and now I have to fight this ugly thing instead of concentrating on the happy time it should be.My immediate family (husband, kids, sisterand brother)have been very supportive and that helps,but I can't help worrying
Denise
Denise, please stay positive as you prepare for battle. Fear, worry, and anger are emotions we've all had after receiving a diagnosis of cancer. Take advantage of the modern medicine that is available to you as it will help you in your fight.
Finding out that you are ER/PR- and HER2+ definitely guides the doctors in deciding which treatments will be best. You will not be needing a hormone blocker since your cancer does not have hormone receptors. Herceptin is not a traditional chemo, but rather a targeted therapy used only for HER2+ cancers. Since you are HER2+, your oncologist will probably recommend that you have it for a full year. By itself, Herceptin is very tolerable.
It sounds like the surgeon is optimistic about removing the tumor, be sure to keep that in mind. I'm hoping you have good results on your scans too. Let us know how your treatment is progressing and how you're doing. Best wishes and God bless.
Marsha
P.S. I too am ER/PR-HER2+0
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