Has anyone else???

lilli1020
lilli1020 Member Posts: 114
edited March 2014 in Grief and Bereavement #1
Have you gotton any Christmas cards addressed to you and your loved one that has passed on? I have and even though I know they just don't know, or haven't heard yet it doesn't lessen the pain I feel in my gut. If only it was both of us together like always.....God I never thought this would happen to me and I really don't think I am over the anger stage yet. Will this confusion ever end????????? I HATE it!

Comments

  • Hopeful720
    Hopeful720 Member Posts: 89
    #2
    I am sorry
    I am sorry that you experienced that this Christmas. That is very painful. Thinking of you this Holiday.
  • 3Mana
    3Mana Member Posts: 811
    #3
    Not for me
    Lilli,
    All the cards I got were just addressed to me. It was still hard reading them and knowing this Christmas I'll be without him for the first time. I actually had bad days before Christmas. Went to the cemetary on thursday and cried alot that day. Yesterday at my son's I tried to be strong for my grandkids. My daughter-in-law started crying all of a sudden at the dinner table cause I think she was remembering he wasn't there.
    We made it through our 1st Christmas without our husbands, and I know we'll be okay. Where did you spend Christmas??
    It's a year ago in January since Tom was diagnosed. Can't believe the time has passed so fast. Well Lilli, hope you're doing okay today. Take care. "CArole"
  • Beckymarie
    Beckymarie Member Posts: 357
    #4
    3Mana said:

    Not for me
    Lilli,
    All the cards I got were just addressed to me. It was still hard reading them and knowing this Christmas I'll be without him for the first time. I actually had bad days before Christmas. Went to the cemetary on thursday and cried alot that day. Yesterday at my son's I tried to be strong for my grandkids. My daughter-in-law started crying all of a sudden at the dinner table cause I think she was remembering he wasn't there.
    We made it through our 1st Christmas without our husbands, and I know we'll be okay. Where did you spend Christmas??
    It's a year ago in January since Tom was diagnosed. Can't believe the time has passed so fast. Well Lilli, hope you're doing okay today. Take care. "CArole"

    Christmas Cards
    Oddly, I received less cards this year than last year. Maybe friends knew I was not into the season. There were a couple that were addressed to the both of us, but I was kind of prepared for that. I too, Carole, found the days leading up to the holiday very difficult. Had a couple of meltdowns. Christmas itself was not quite as bad as I anticipated. I did take my tree down this morning. Need to move on from the holidays. Hopefully, next year will be a little easier.
    Best to all,
    Becky
  • lilli1020
    lilli1020 Member Posts: 114
    #5
    3Mana said:

    Not for me
    Lilli,
    All the cards I got were just addressed to me. It was still hard reading them and knowing this Christmas I'll be without him for the first time. I actually had bad days before Christmas. Went to the cemetary on thursday and cried alot that day. Yesterday at my son's I tried to be strong for my grandkids. My daughter-in-law started crying all of a sudden at the dinner table cause I think she was remembering he wasn't there.
    We made it through our 1st Christmas without our husbands, and I know we'll be okay. Where did you spend Christmas??
    It's a year ago in January since Tom was diagnosed. Can't believe the time has passed so fast. Well Lilli, hope you're doing okay today. Take care. "CArole"

    I was here at home with my
    I was here at home with my daughter and her boyfriend and his family. I am glad it's over and I am looking to a fresh start to a new year....2011 HAS to be better, for all of us I hope and pray. Have a happy and blessed New Year!!!!
    Gayle
  • ruthelizabeth
    ruthelizabeth Member Posts: 138
    #6
    lilli1020 said:

    I was here at home with my
    I was here at home with my daughter and her boyfriend and his family. I am glad it's over and I am looking to a fresh start to a new year....2011 HAS to be better, for all of us I hope and pray. Have a happy and blessed New Year!!!!
    Gayle

    It's just everything
    I think, I really think, I could have made it thru Christmas fairly decently if I hadn't been forced into retirement. I'll still be working for a month, but I was told in early November and it wasn't done nicely. This is the first year in my whole life when I did nothing for Christmas. I sent cards and did things for other people, but I just didn't have the heart to do anything at home.

    My pastor (I've been a church secretary here for 20 years) told me that change is hard, but this is a great choice for me (Unh hunh, I really had a choice). I said that when he'd lost everything in 8 months, then he could say that. Well, let's just say that guilty consciences can produce some brutal remarks.

    I would like to think that there's something good ahead, but I don't. Maybe once I'm not under all this stress, I'll feel differently.
  • Beckymarie
    Beckymarie Member Posts: 357
    #7
    ruthelizabeth said:

    It's just everything
    I think, I really think, I could have made it thru Christmas fairly decently if I hadn't been forced into retirement. I'll still be working for a month, but I was told in early November and it wasn't done nicely. This is the first year in my whole life when I did nothing for Christmas. I sent cards and did things for other people, but I just didn't have the heart to do anything at home.

    My pastor (I've been a church secretary here for 20 years) told me that change is hard, but this is a great choice for me (Unh hunh, I really had a choice). I said that when he'd lost everything in 8 months, then he could say that. Well, let's just say that guilty consciences can produce some brutal remarks.

    I would like to think that there's something good ahead, but I don't. Maybe once I'm not under all this stress, I'll feel differently.

    Forced Retirement
    That really stinks that you would be forced into leaving your job. I would lose my mind if I did not have my job to go to everyday. Wouldn't you think that a people oriented organization like a church could have postponed this decision for awhile longer under the circumstances. Let's hope there is something good ahead for all of us. 2011 has to hold better things. Hang in there.
    Becky

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