Any other 20-29 year olds a caregiver for their mom?

nametags
nametags Member Posts: 1
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
I'm 22 and I'm currently my mom's caregiver. She was diagnosed with breast cancer back in 2006 and we discovered it metastasized into her bones last fall. Although most of the time my mom is fine, and I'm there for moral support it is draining me. I'm scared about what the future holds and as of right now statistics say she only has about 10 more years to live. I'm worried that I won't be able to have her around for important moments of my life and it's leading to anxiety in my day to day life directed at other things. I was hoping to find others in my position that could help explain how they've dealt with it?

Comments

  • Barbara53
    Barbara53 Member Posts: 652
    #2
    right place
    Tags, you've come to the right place, and it's a matter of time before you make special friends on this board to help you make it through. You can also try the emotional support board, often used by people in pain of all ages.

    I have a daughter your age, so I understand your world and how cancer simply does not fit! I also understand how much you still need your Mom! My mother has ovarian cancer, but she's very old so it's more or less natural. If you're thinking It's Not Fair!! we understand that, too.

    Forget statistics. Live one day at a time, and be there for your Mom as best you can. It's all you can do, and whatever comes, you will get through it.
  • DEVIN1016
    DEVIN1016 Member Posts: 6
    #3
    Barbara53 said:

    right place
    Tags, you've come to the right place, and it's a matter of time before you make special friends on this board to help you make it through. You can also try the emotional support board, often used by people in pain of all ages.

    I have a daughter your age, so I understand your world and how cancer simply does not fit! I also understand how much you still need your Mom! My mother has ovarian cancer, but she's very old so it's more or less natural. If you're thinking It's Not Fair!! we understand that, too.

    Forget statistics. Live one day at a time, and be there for your Mom as best you can. It's all you can do, and whatever comes, you will get through it.

    Hi Tags~
    Im so sorry for what you are going through. I was in your shoes, although only for a very short period. I am 26 and my Mother was diagnosed May 27th with Stage IV Lung cancer met to brain, adrenal and lymph. The doctors operated and removed the tumor from her brain and started radiation on the brain the following week. She went for 2 weeks of radiation 5 days a week. She had a week off and then began chemo which was 1 day a week for 5 hours. She fought as heard as she could but lost her battle on 09/23. I cannot tell you that it wont hurt, or that it will be easy in any way. I am more heartbroken then I evern though imaginable. I still need my Mom so much. I have an 18 month old son who will never know his grandmother or how much she loved him. He will never remember the first year of his life when he spent everyday with her. I find comfort in knowing how much joy he brought to her, and I know she loved him more then anything in the world. Mom's doctors were confident that they could get her into remission, but it just wasnt in the cards. Tomorrow is Mom's birthday, and I have been crying all day thinking about how I will face it. I wish you courage and strength, I will pray for you and your family. Hold close the memories you have and make as many more as you can for whatever time you have left...Hopefully its a long long long time!
  • Stephanie313
    Stephanie313 Member Posts: 5
    #4
    Hi
    Hi! I completely understand what you are going through. I myself am a caregiver for my 74 year old grandfather. He has COPD, emphazema, congestive heart failure, and dementia. Being young and being a caregive can be a very trying task, I'm only 20, and its a lot harder than what people think. I've found that being a caregive can be very overwhelming at times but its worth it. Just remember to always make time for yourself so you dont get to overwhelmed. As well as talk with as many friends and family as you can just to vent and that has helped. I've also found that if you talk to someone that is outside of your circle of family and friends to talk to that can help relieve some stress and get some outside help. I hope this has helped you some.
  • hope_for_all
    hope_for_all Member Posts: 5
    #5
    I'm 30 and starting the
    I'm 30 and starting the caregiving process with my mom. She starts treatment (chemo) this week. I don't have any answers for you on how to deal with it other than try to make some time for yourself. Easier said than done, I know. But whatever it is you enjoy try to find a little time for it. For me, I crave piece and quiet. I have small children and it's hard to find that. All the info and things to remember from doctors is all so heavy and overwhelming at times. Hang in there and reach out when you need to! Taking on this kind of role so young is a hard thing to do.
  • ketziah35
    ketziah35 Member Posts: 1,145
    #6
    Sometimes it pays to be
    Sometimes it pays to be blunt and I think that this is the time to excercise use of my natural abilities.There are organizations out there through support groups, religious institution and the American cancer Society to help transPort, help clean houses, and sit with your loved ones. You just have to search through these avenues For support, esPecially the support groups through medical facilities or the American Cancer Society. This will enable you to get a break and learn more about services available to you and your loved one.

    Sorry for the typos. I am on a blackberry.

    God Bless!

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