Did having kidney cancer change your life?
The tumor was the size of a baseball and now I am doing fine.
I am usually a pretty tolerant person and am finding I am having trouble tolerating people who play games with others, mainly at the office. I am wondering if anyone else has experienced this or noticed other changes in themselves since their surgery or since hearing they have cancer.
Comments
-
Changes
Hi Ladywolf!
Having major surgery, especially for a life-threatening illness, does tend to focus the mind on one's true values and on what's important to us and what is not. I think this is a good thing- & maybe the only good thing to come out of the whole rotten experience. Many people have said that they now have no time for "crap", and little tolerance for pettiness and selfishness etc. Our illness is often a shortcut to wisdom & perspective, though it'd be great if the wisdom could be achieved more painlessly...
I havn't felt greater intolerance as such, but often now do feel very removed from all the silly dramas & games around me- it's like the perpetrators are on a different planet & none of that pointless stuff resonates with me. Other people are on their own path & will find enlightenment in their own unique way, one hopes. It's more important that you examine your feelings for what they say about you, rather than what they say about others. We can never really know what is going on with anyone else or why they act as they do- but we can take responsibility for the effect their actions have on us personally.
Hope you are well, and all the best,
Von0 -
If you aren't changed after cancer something is wrong
Any life threatening situation changes a person in one way or another I think. Some more than others perhaps but I can't imagin anyone not coming out of the experience with new revelations on life and love.
Your feelings are totally normal and from your cancer experience you will find that you have grown even more than you might know right now but will discover over time.
I know that for me I am a far better person than I was before all diagnosis and treatments. Of course I was pretty darn perfect before as well, lol. Now I am just 'perfecter'. lol. Just kidding around. Humour is important in it all too.
I had non hodgkins lymphoma 22 years ago and have been considered cured for the last 15 years, have developed symptoms that are focusing on kidney and abdomen so I am on this board asking questions.
All the best to you and yours. One step at a time, remember.
Blessings,
Bluerose0 -
Hi Von,Von55 said:Changes
Hi Ladywolf!
Having major surgery, especially for a life-threatening illness, does tend to focus the mind on one's true values and on what's important to us and what is not. I think this is a good thing- & maybe the only good thing to come out of the whole rotten experience. Many people have said that they now have no time for "crap", and little tolerance for pettiness and selfishness etc. Our illness is often a shortcut to wisdom & perspective, though it'd be great if the wisdom could be achieved more painlessly...
I havn't felt greater intolerance as such, but often now do feel very removed from all the silly dramas & games around me- it's like the perpetrators are on a different planet & none of that pointless stuff resonates with me. Other people are on their own path & will find enlightenment in their own unique way, one hopes. It's more important that you examine your feelings for what they say about you, rather than what they say about others. We can never really know what is going on with anyone else or why they act as they do- but we can take responsibility for the effect their actions have on us personally.
Hope you are well, and all the best,
Von
I couldn't have said
Hi Von,
I couldn't have said it better. I don't expect others to have the same appreciation that I do for all of life's blessings. As you said they will find their enlightenment in their own way in the own time. All I can do is be happy and enjoy my life and not let other's negativity effect me. I feel like I've been let in on a secret that they have yet to find.
Here's to everyone that has found it!
Anna0 -
I agree, but do not recommend itbluerose said:If you aren't changed after cancer something is wrong
Any life threatening situation changes a person in one way or another I think. Some more than others perhaps but I can't imagin anyone not coming out of the experience with new revelations on life and love.
Your feelings are totally normal and from your cancer experience you will find that you have grown even more than you might know right now but will discover over time.
I know that for me I am a far better person than I was before all diagnosis and treatments. Of course I was pretty darn perfect before as well, lol. Now I am just 'perfecter'. lol. Just kidding around. Humour is important in it all too.
I had non hodgkins lymphoma 22 years ago and have been considered cured for the last 15 years, have developed symptoms that are focusing on kidney and abdomen so I am on this board asking questions.
All the best to you and yours. One step at a time, remember.
Blessings,
Bluerose
I agree with the previous posts that we have all had a positive outlok on life from being a Kidney Cancer survivor. However I would not recommend geting Kidney Cancer for those not members of our club.0 -
Thank you allVon55 said:Changes
Hi Ladywolf!
Having major surgery, especially for a life-threatening illness, does tend to focus the mind on one's true values and on what's important to us and what is not. I think this is a good thing- & maybe the only good thing to come out of the whole rotten experience. Many people have said that they now have no time for "crap", and little tolerance for pettiness and selfishness etc. Our illness is often a shortcut to wisdom & perspective, though it'd be great if the wisdom could be achieved more painlessly...
I havn't felt greater intolerance as such, but often now do feel very removed from all the silly dramas & games around me- it's like the perpetrators are on a different planet & none of that pointless stuff resonates with me. Other people are on their own path & will find enlightenment in their own unique way, one hopes. It's more important that you examine your feelings for what they say about you, rather than what they say about others. We can never really know what is going on with anyone else or why they act as they do- but we can take responsibility for the effect their actions have on us personally.
Hope you are well, and all the best,
Von
Von,Anna,Bluerose and Icemantoo,
Thank you all for your wonderful comments. I really appreciate them more than words can express. Von I truly love the way you stated this information. After I wrote on this page I took a step back and basically told myself I can't control what other people do or how they act I can only control myself. I went into work on Monday morning with a whole new attitude and am truly amazed at how much better I feel. (I was ready to walk off my job)I took some CD's of my favorite music and there I sit at my desk doing my job listening to the tunes.. The game players are outside my office along with the gossip gals, and my little office world is now full of country music and happiness. I feel like my old self only better and am actually getting something done. For some reason the gossip gals just don't like being informed that I am not interested in their gossip and the game players well lets just say they don't like being informed that I prefer cards to their little games.(said jokingly of course ,which does the trick) I have also discovered that God created all of equal with our only talents and special personalities and guess what that makes me the individual I am today. I truly am blessed and can't wait to see what other things I will discover tomorrow.Sometimes its the simple things in life we forget to remember. God bless you all and hope everyone is doing well.0 -
Questionsbluerose said:If you aren't changed after cancer something is wrong
Any life threatening situation changes a person in one way or another I think. Some more than others perhaps but I can't imagin anyone not coming out of the experience with new revelations on life and love.
Your feelings are totally normal and from your cancer experience you will find that you have grown even more than you might know right now but will discover over time.
I know that for me I am a far better person than I was before all diagnosis and treatments. Of course I was pretty darn perfect before as well, lol. Now I am just 'perfecter'. lol. Just kidding around. Humour is important in it all too.
I had non hodgkins lymphoma 22 years ago and have been considered cured for the last 15 years, have developed symptoms that are focusing on kidney and abdomen so I am on this board asking questions.
All the best to you and yours. One step at a time, remember.
Blessings,
Bluerose
Thank you for saying my feelings are normal.. I was begining to wonder.
If there are any questions I can help you answer ask away. I am by no means an expect on Kidney cancer and honestly don't want to be but I am here if you need to talk.
God Bless
Ladywolf0 -
Focus on the Rainbowladywolf said:Thank you all
Von,Anna,Bluerose and Icemantoo,
Thank you all for your wonderful comments. I really appreciate them more than words can express. Von I truly love the way you stated this information. After I wrote on this page I took a step back and basically told myself I can't control what other people do or how they act I can only control myself. I went into work on Monday morning with a whole new attitude and am truly amazed at how much better I feel. (I was ready to walk off my job)I took some CD's of my favorite music and there I sit at my desk doing my job listening to the tunes.. The game players are outside my office along with the gossip gals, and my little office world is now full of country music and happiness. I feel like my old self only better and am actually getting something done. For some reason the gossip gals just don't like being informed that I am not interested in their gossip and the game players well lets just say they don't like being informed that I prefer cards to their little games.(said jokingly of course ,which does the trick) I have also discovered that God created all of equal with our only talents and special personalities and guess what that makes me the individual I am today. I truly am blessed and can't wait to see what other things I will discover tomorrow.Sometimes its the simple things in life we forget to remember. God bless you all and hope everyone is doing well.
Hi Ladywolf,
I was really pleased to hear about your new perspective. I laughed when you said that your music helps you to drowned out all of the "gossip gals and game player" That's what I use, well that is when I'm at work. I'm still on leave after my surgery, but I have one very close friend telling me that she is still dealing with the same kind of drama. I know it can rain on your sunny days sometimes but just remember when it does to focus on the rainbow. People may not say it to you but they will notice that you stay above all the crap and may even secretly admire you for it.0 -
Rainbowsamurillo63 said:Focus on the Rainbow
Hi Ladywolf,
I was really pleased to hear about your new perspective. I laughed when you said that your music helps you to drowned out all of the "gossip gals and game player" That's what I use, well that is when I'm at work. I'm still on leave after my surgery, but I have one very close friend telling me that she is still dealing with the same kind of drama. I know it can rain on your sunny days sometimes but just remember when it does to focus on the rainbow. People may not say it to you but they will notice that you stay above all the crap and may even secretly admire you for it.
Hi Amurillo63
thank you for the great advise. I am truly loving the music in my office. I am so productive and you may want to tell your friend to just be honest with the gossip gals and players and tell them she is not into that. I tell you its working just great for me. I even said it to my boss yesterday.. boy the look on her face was just so priceless I had a good chuckle when she turned and walked away.
How are your doing after your surgery? I remember being so bored at first and then it hit me I may not be able to lift much but yarn and my crochet hook don't weigh alot so I worked on afghans. Do you do any crafts?
Heres to a quick recovery for you0 -
Crafty ladies!ladywolf said:Rainbows
Hi Amurillo63
thank you for the great advise. I am truly loving the music in my office. I am so productive and you may want to tell your friend to just be honest with the gossip gals and players and tell them she is not into that. I tell you its working just great for me. I even said it to my boss yesterday.. boy the look on her face was just so priceless I had a good chuckle when she turned and walked away.
How are your doing after your surgery? I remember being so bored at first and then it hit me I may not be able to lift much but yarn and my crochet hook don't weigh alot so I worked on afghans. Do you do any crafts?
Heres to a quick recovery for you
Love the rainbow bit! I could really relate to the craft idea too- I'm a beader and wireworker, and from the day I came home from hospital was able to waddle into my jewellery cubby-hole, sink into that comfy chair, and create like mad! It's so great to use your body again in a way that reinforces its grace and skill- very important when we're tempted to feel that our bodies have betrayed us or that they're just not working as they should. And if something beautiful comes out of the process, it's a joy to others too.
Take good care, Amurillo63 & Ladywolf
Von xx0 -
Crafty ladies!ladywolf said:Rainbows
Hi Amurillo63
thank you for the great advise. I am truly loving the music in my office. I am so productive and you may want to tell your friend to just be honest with the gossip gals and players and tell them she is not into that. I tell you its working just great for me. I even said it to my boss yesterday.. boy the look on her face was just so priceless I had a good chuckle when she turned and walked away.
How are your doing after your surgery? I remember being so bored at first and then it hit me I may not be able to lift much but yarn and my crochet hook don't weigh alot so I worked on afghans. Do you do any crafts?
Heres to a quick recovery for you
Love the rainbow bit! I could really relate to the craft idea too- I'm a beader and wireworker, and from the day I came home from hospital was able to waddle into my jewellery cubby-hole, sink into that comfy chair, and create like mad! It's so great to use your body again in a way that reinforces its grace and skill- very important when we're tempted to feel that our bodies have betrayed us or that they're just not working as they should. And if something beautiful comes out of the process, it's a joy to others too.
Take good care, Amurillo63 & Ladywolf
Von xx0 -
Hi Ladywolf,ladywolf said:Rainbows
Hi Amurillo63
thank you for the great advise. I am truly loving the music in my office. I am so productive and you may want to tell your friend to just be honest with the gossip gals and players and tell them she is not into that. I tell you its working just great for me. I even said it to my boss yesterday.. boy the look on her face was just so priceless I had a good chuckle when she turned and walked away.
How are your doing after your surgery? I remember being so bored at first and then it hit me I may not be able to lift much but yarn and my crochet hook don't weigh alot so I worked on afghans. Do you do any crafts?
Heres to a quick recovery for you
I'm happy to hear that things are better for you at work. That is too funny bout your boss, way to go! I will pass that on to my friend for sure. I am doing good I guess? Sometimes I wonder if my recovery is going along at a good pace? Sometimes I feel like Wonder Woman then other times not so good. My scar is healing pretty well. I have some pain in my ribs and since I had a portion of rib removed I guess thats to be expected. The other thing I'm not very sure if this is a ussual after surgery pain? I am having back pain. Not flank pain which would seem more normal but mid back pain. I am trying to do some yoga and have read more books that I can count but other than that I can't knit or crochet, wish I could. Maybe I should take a class huh?? It's great to talk to you again.
Thanks for sharing your work story, your right it was Priceless! Thanks so much for the well wishes. Being able to talk to all my fellow members has been a great help! Thanks to all of you! Yur all AWESOME!0 -
Hi Von55,Von55 said:Crafty ladies!
Love the rainbow bit! I could really relate to the craft idea too- I'm a beader and wireworker, and from the day I came home from hospital was able to waddle into my jewellery cubby-hole, sink into that comfy chair, and create like mad! It's so great to use your body again in a way that reinforces its grace and skill- very important when we're tempted to feel that our bodies have betrayed us or that they're just not working as they should. And if something beautiful comes out of the process, it's a joy to others too.
Take good care, Amurillo63 & Ladywolf
Von xx
Sorry I missed
Hi Von55,
Sorry I missed your post before I replied to Ladywolf but thanks for the reply. WoW it was crazy to me that I just got done talking about my recovery and then I read this post about feeling like our body has betrayed us. The doctors didn't tell me much about what to expect in regards to recovery so that is why being able to talk to everyone that has experienced it and understands the fears and concerns is great! Can't thank you all enough!0 -
How are you doing?ladywolf said:Questions
Thank you for saying my feelings are normal.. I was begining to wonder.
If there are any questions I can help you answer ask away. I am by no means an expect on Kidney cancer and honestly don't want to be but I am here if you need to talk.
God Bless
Ladywolf
Just checking in to see how everyone is, and hoping that you're all well. I'm 8 weeks post-op now & can't believe the difference that time makes! Have just started lying on my left side, and can make it to 20 minutes without much pain- sounds like a small thing, but it's a breakthrough for me. I still have strange aches and shooting pains, and really need to keep my water intake up otherwise the discomfort becomes really acute, but that's manageable. Now I'm back to where the arthritis in my spine is more painful than the incision/nerve pain, haha!
Hang in there, and please let me know how you are, esp Ladywolf & Amurillo!
Von xx0 -
Time makes all the differenceVon55 said:How are you doing?
Just checking in to see how everyone is, and hoping that you're all well. I'm 8 weeks post-op now & can't believe the difference that time makes! Have just started lying on my left side, and can make it to 20 minutes without much pain- sounds like a small thing, but it's a breakthrough for me. I still have strange aches and shooting pains, and really need to keep my water intake up otherwise the discomfort becomes really acute, but that's manageable. Now I'm back to where the arthritis in my spine is more painful than the incision/nerve pain, haha!
Hang in there, and please let me know how you are, esp Ladywolf & Amurillo!
Von xx
Hi Von,
It's great to hear from you! Glad to hear that you are doing good 8 weeks into it. It gives me something to look forward to. I have 6 weeks post-op and you're so right time does make a world of difference, and believe me it is no small thing when you go without pain or can sleep on your side or have a bra on all day without it hurting. I am looking forward to that day. Sorry to hear that you have arthritis to contend with as well. Keeping up with drinking all that water is a real challenge for me but never related the pain with the lack of water thanks for that info. Kind of a Duh Moment for me... :}
Hope all is well with all my CSN FRIENDS.
Anna0 -
KIDNEY CANCER
DEAR LADYWOLF,
I HAVE HAD KIDNEY, BREAST, THYROID AND UTERINE CANCER...I AM 45 YEARS OLD. MY NAME IS TINA. YES IT WILL DEFINATELY CHANGE YOUR LIFE AND YOUR THOUGHTS OF WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT AND WHAT IS NOT. I UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL. THE THINGS I THOUGHT WAS IMPORTANT ARE NO LONGER... MY PRIORITY IS LIFE, FAMILY, FRIENDS. AND HELPING ANYONE I CAN THRU THERE WALK AFTER OR DURING Cancer..0 -
Hi Anna.....I feel exactly the same wayamurillo63 said:Hi Von,
I couldn't have said
Hi Von,
I couldn't have said it better. I don't expect others to have the same appreciation that I do for all of life's blessings. As you said they will find their enlightenment in their own way in the own time. All I can do is be happy and enjoy my life and not let other's negativity effect me. I feel like I've been let in on a secret that they have yet to find.
Here's to everyone that has found it!
Anna
I too am enjoying life...each day is a miracle to me...I try not to think about the cancer that was discovered inside of me three mos ago.....yes life is good0
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