Can someone make me understand

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Comments

  • sasjourney
    sasjourney Member Posts: 395 Member
    #22
    Hang in there!
    Tina,

    I know when I was on chemo I felt horrible during that week. I was angry that I had to go through this, angry and feeling guilty that my family had to go through this, feeling lousy from the chemo, and just wanting my old life back. It was and is so hard to accept and frustrating because I wanted it all to go away. Things will get better. Give him space, but also let him know that you are there when he wants to talk. You are doing a great job! Take care of yourself and try to do something that you enjoy. You and Jorge are in my prayers.

    Hugs,
    Sara
  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    #23
    just4Brooks said:

    It's a hell of a ride
    He'll be okay.. the whole cancer trip gets to be too much sometimes (even the good news). Give him some time to let things soak in.

    Brooks

    Brooks
    yes your right that's what i will do Thank you Tina
  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    #24
    Lovekitties said:

    The emotional side of a
    The emotional side of a cancer diagnosis is as difficult as the physical and hits the care givers particularly hard. Don't worry that you are doing anything wrong. It is obvious from your posts that you deeply care for Jorge.

    As you both go through this process it is important that you communicate about everything. It is ok for him to know your concerns and for you to know his. In talking about it and laying the plan out together, you will both begin to feel you have more control. Getting him to talk about how he is feeling after chemo will help you to understand how to proceed.

    None of us, patient or caregiver, wants to upset the other by showing strong emotions. I don't know if that is right or wrong. It all depends on the moment I guess. Men see their roll in the relationship as taking care of everyone else, not having to be taken care of. You just need to help him understand that it is a partnership, helping each other through this.

    It is hard for the patient to remember that progress against this disease is made in small steps. Perhaps Jorge was thinking his CEA should have been 0 instead of just being lower.

    You mentioned before that you had gotten Jorge to sit and read some of the posts here with you. Please encourage him to do that more often. Everyone here wants to help you both in any way we can to deal with the ups and the downs.

    Hugs,

    Marie who loves kitties

    Marie
    Thank you so much Marie it means so much for your support and i will be siting down with him to talk about his feels and is one of those men who think he should be taking care of me .and it's hard for him to let me do it .i'm sure hope it gets better soon. thank you so much Tina
  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    #25
    sasjourney said:

    Hang in there!
    Tina,

    I know when I was on chemo I felt horrible during that week. I was angry that I had to go through this, angry and feeling guilty that my family had to go through this, feeling lousy from the chemo, and just wanting my old life back. It was and is so hard to accept and frustrating because I wanted it all to go away. Things will get better. Give him space, but also let him know that you are there when he wants to talk. You are doing a great job! Take care of yourself and try to do something that you enjoy. You and Jorge are in my prayers.

    Hugs,
    Sara

    Sara
    Thank you so much Sara love Tina
  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
    #26
    Just a thought
    I hope he'll perk up soon and be able to enjoy the fact that things seem to be going in the right direction. And you know what, that might be one of the things going on with him now. Maybe it's hard for him to trust that things ARE going in the right direction. Give him time and make sure to take care of yourself, too.

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    #27
    tootsie1 said:

    Just a thought
    I hope he'll perk up soon and be able to enjoy the fact that things seem to be going in the right direction. And you know what, that might be one of the things going on with him now. Maybe it's hard for him to trust that things ARE going in the right direction. Give him time and make sure to take care of yourself, too.

    *hugs*
    Gail

    Gail
    Thank you so very much thats what he could be feeling <3

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