Terrified

mswijiknyc
mswijiknyc Member Posts: 421
edited March 2014 in Caregivers #1
My husband had surgery to remove his tumor 1 Octber 2010 which meant a complete laryngectomy. He has a stoma and for the past week has had two drainage tubes, one on each side of his neck (I call them bedbugs) One of the bedbugs was removed and the other one should be removed tomorrow. He is also having a swallow test to make sure he can eat and drink without problems. I really don't see any problems coming up. Then he should be coming home either Monday 11 October 2010 or Tuesday 12 October 2010.

I am absolutely terrified of him coming home.

Am I going to be able to care for him? Am I going to be able to get all of the things he needs? Oh so many many things he needs . . . stoma filters, suction machine, electrolarynx, humidifiers, visiting nurses, physical therapy, transportation to and from his appointments since we don't have a car. What if he needs suction? It scares me to put anything in his stoma. What if I do it wrong? What if, what if, what if . . . .

I am so scared I won't be able to do this. I am so scared I will do something wrong and hurt him or cause him to go back to the hospital all because I was trying to help.

I guess I will know sometime soon. Because he will be coming home whether I am ready or not.

Comments

  • mswijiknyc
    mswijiknyc Member Posts: 421
    #2
    Update
    He texted me this morning that the bedbug that was taken out had to be put back in. The side of his neck was the size of a football. I saw that yesterday and wondered about it. Not sure if that means he will be staying longer or not.

    Even more nervous now.
  • junklady
    junklady Member Posts: 88 Member
    #3
    You'll be okay
    You will be oaky with all the equipment. Make sure that before he leaves the hospital you are shown how to use everything. My husband only had a trach for a year, not a laryngectomy, but had the suction machine, humidifier/nebulizer. Saline solution to put down the trach to break up the mucus. Actually my husband learned to suction himself. I saw on this site a while back, that there is someone who had a laryngectomy. You might want to find that person and talk to her. Type in "need help with laryngectomy", someone should respond. I will be tough at first, but it gets easier. Best to you both.

    Cynthia
  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    #4
    Amazing
    It is amazing what we are able to do when we have to do it. As recommended here, be sure that the nurses go over everything with you. Ask questions if you don't understand. Ask them to watch you do it. You will be fine. Take care, Fay
  • mr steve
    mr steve Member Posts: 285
    #5
    mswijiknyc said:

    Update
    He texted me this morning that the bedbug that was taken out had to be put back in. The side of his neck was the size of a football. I saw that yesterday and wondered about it. Not sure if that means he will be staying longer or not.

    Even more nervous now.

    nervous
    You'll be nervous scared worried and just about every other feeling you can have. But like its been said you will be amazed at what you can do. If I can do it, anyone can.

    Steve
  • mr steve
    mr steve Member Posts: 285
    #6
    mswijiknyc said:

    Update
    He texted me this morning that the bedbug that was taken out had to be put back in. The side of his neck was the size of a football. I saw that yesterday and wondered about it. Not sure if that means he will be staying longer or not.

    Even more nervous now.

    nervous
    You'll be nervous scared worried and just about every other feeling you can have. But like its been said you will be amazed at what you can do. If I can do it, anyone can.

    Steve
  • Luv2lunch
    Luv2lunch Member Posts: 270
    #7
    You will be fine. Don't be
    You will be fine. Don't be scared. I also was scared when we were going to bring my Mom home from the hospital. She had two drains coming from her bottom area and a stoma in her stomach. I made sure to bring a notebook to the hospital and when the ostomy nurse came in to explain things, I wrote everything down. We were also given a home health agency that came out to check on mom a couple of times a week. Maybe you might be able to get something like that? Ask them at the hospital. They were great. There was even a 24 hour emergency number to call in case of an emergency at night and the nurse would come out.
    I think I was so scared about Mom making it through the surgery at all, that the rest was not so bad.
    Hang in there, it will be ok.
    Linda

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