A huge "thank you" to all

lindadanis
lindadanis Member Posts: 235
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
To all my friends and especially Willam:

I want to thank you all for everything you have done throughout this horrible year. I read each and everyone of your posts and especially yours William, a big thank you to you for everything, especially keeping Ed and my Mom's tribute for one year. What can I say? I have endured a horrible year, losing Eddie and then my Mom nine days later. She has told me mutiple times in the past year that her and Eddie would be going to Heaven together, I used to get mad at her because I did not want to believe it. She must of wanted this to happen, because last Friday night as I was holding her hand, watching her take her last breath, she did go to Heaven, I believe that Ed was calling for her and she heard him. I buried my Mom yesterday, read an eulogy that I wrote, did not think I could get up in front of all those people and do it, but believe me, something came over me right beore it was my turn and I go this big sense of "it's ok" and did it. I was proud of myself, never have read in front of anyone my entire life and did it like a pro. I know my Mom was right beside me as I was reading, I felt her presence as I felt Ed's also. William, the best advice you gave me was to get up that hospital and visit her. I am so thankful I listened to you because I would of regretted it all of my life if I didn't go. I whispered in her ear, "It's ok to go be with Ed" and she took a few breaths and went. It was a very peaceful death, unlike Ed's, and I am honored to have been with her. She was my best friend, I will miss her dearly forever.

Diana and I are doing ok this morning, she had a good cry last night, missing her Dad as I expected. This month could not have turned out more horrible for us and for my entire family. I believe in Heaven, I believe that my Eddie and Mom are together and I will be ok.

I want to thank everyone of you that have posted on this website and also on Ed's and my Mom's. I have read them all. I will continue to read all the stores on e/c website. You have all become a big part of my life. I have forgiven Ed for all those nasty things he did and said to me as I believe the cancer in his brain made him not right. This is the way I have decided to let go, I cannot hold onto anger. I loved him 27 years ago when I met him and still loved him the day he died. I am sure you all understand what I mean.

Will continue to post.

Love to all

Linda

Comments

  • Noellesmom
    Noellesmom Member Posts: 1,859 Member
    #2
    the month
    I hope, in time, you will come see this last month in a different light - this is the month your mother and your husband got to see God's face.

    What a wonder that must have been, Linda. Ed showing your mother her new home.

    Hugs.
  • sandy1943
    sandy1943 Member Posts: 824
    #3
    Linda, My prayers and
    Linda, My prayers and thoughts will be with you and diana. As time goes on, you will remember the good times more than the bad.The fact you were with your mom when she passed showed how much you loved her. Once again you put someone else before yourself. The times you have done this in the past year has just made you a stronger person. That is one of the reasons you were able to stand before the people and speak. God was with you, holding your hand.
    Sandra
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #4
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

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