Losing My Mind

Sharon968
Sharon968 Member Posts: 10
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I am awaiting my Surgery date of October 8th. (bilateral mastectomy) I think I am losing my mind though. I described this the other day as feeling like I am being hurled at hurricane, only I look around at everyone else in my life and they all look just as calm and cool as a cucumber. Life as normal! I'm not scared about my surgery. I think this has alot to do with so much happening so fast. I am also having gal bladder removed the week before my mastectomy surgery. Work is hectic (dental hygienist-busy schedule), Feeling like I don't have time to work. 50 million doctor visits it seems. 50 million co-pays that don't coincide with 50 million days out of work to attend all these doctor meetings. I Quit Smoking on Monday Night(after 20 years), Cold Turkey, because my plastic surgeon mentioned something about the new ta-ta's falling off. (not really just complications):o)

Anyway, friends, I am crying every 10 min, my poor husband is running from me. Poor thing, he wont make eye contact because I think he is afraid of the repercussions. (exaggerating just a bit) but seriously. I love him tremendously but he is the only one here, so he catches it! :o\ My nerves are shot. I have called my primary care doctor for something to take the edge off, but no return call. Frustrating, and I haven't even gotten to the hardest part yet..I"m sure! Seriously hoping this gets better! I guess this qualifies as a vent session?

Comments

  • Pinkpower
    Pinkpower Member Posts: 437
    #2
    Oh Sharon, Im so sorry to
    Oh Sharon, Im so sorry to hear everything you are going thru. I know there is so much going on at the same time, but hang in there sister. Before you know it, you will be thru the worst. You have a little sense of humor... thats good. We have too put a little humor it does make it just a tad bit easier. Sending you hugs and prayers. (Plus a little extra for your husband, lol)

    Lupe
  • Skeezie
    Skeezie Member Posts: 586 Member
    #3
    Sharon I remember this feeling well.
    It was a little over a year ago for me, only single. It's hard to imagine the world is still going on as normal when the worst thing that could ever happen to you has happened. Let me assure you that your feelings are 100% normal. Thankfully, time will pass and this will be over. I was not working and I so admire all you girls that are working while going thru this! You definitely need something to take the edge off. I took Ativan from the nite I felt the lump until after chemo was over. I took one in the morning and one at nite to sleep. It really helps. My husband took one to help him sleep as well.

    Call you doc again, do you have an onc? Call that doc, they are usually only to happy to help with any Rx you need.

    By the way, I cried everyday until chemo was over with. Not big boohoos, but certainly teary for a few minutes. But a big boohoo is great once in a while. It's ok to have a pity party too, only don't invite friends and make it a short party cause you need your strength to fight this monster.

    Keep us posted on your feelings and progress. This is a soft place to fall to vent, cry, ask questions, anything in the world. Everyone here wants to try to help. This waiting part is the very worst.

    Hugs, Judy :-)
  • carkris
    carkris Member Posts: 4,553 Member
    #4
    Skeezie said:

    Sharon I remember this feeling well.
    It was a little over a year ago for me, only single. It's hard to imagine the world is still going on as normal when the worst thing that could ever happen to you has happened. Let me assure you that your feelings are 100% normal. Thankfully, time will pass and this will be over. I was not working and I so admire all you girls that are working while going thru this! You definitely need something to take the edge off. I took Ativan from the nite I felt the lump until after chemo was over. I took one in the morning and one at nite to sleep. It really helps. My husband took one to help him sleep as well.

    Call you doc again, do you have an onc? Call that doc, they are usually only to happy to help with any Rx you need.

    By the way, I cried everyday until chemo was over with. Not big boohoos, but certainly teary for a few minutes. But a big boohoo is great once in a while. It's ok to have a pity party too, only don't invite friends and make it a short party cause you need your strength to fight this monster.

    Keep us posted on your feelings and progress. This is a soft place to fall to vent, cry, ask questions, anything in the world. Everyone here wants to try to help. This waiting part is the very worst.

    Hugs, Judy :-)

    going through all of this
    going through all of this and quitting smoking too???? sounds like a full plate, speak to your doc about something to take to get through this. you need to have your wits about you to get through all of this. PS do not like to operate on smokers, because of the blood vessel constiction from smoking, decreases blood flow equals decreased healing. equals potentially poor results.
    Crying is all part of it unfortunately, but man you are juggling too many plates!!! Hugs!
    P.S. I described my life as being like a snow globe, someone shook it up and not sure how it all would settle.
  • cookie97
    cookie97 Member Posts: 200
    #5
    We'll keep looking
    Man I know it's here somwhere, if only I could remeber where I left it?! As soon as I locate my mind I will be on the hunt for yours. As alone as you may feel right now you are experiencing everything that many of us on this board have experienced. The whirlwind of appointments, information overload, work issues, financial issues etc...

    Sorry we all couldn't have met under different cicumstances:(

    Take heart you will get through this and we are all to help. Yell at us all you want and we won't even yell back, nor will we hide from you.

    Call your doc's back and see about some anxiety meds. I had never taken any before, but the day that my PCP started setting all these appointments for me with ultra sound, surgeon etc. I snagged up his little assistant and said "I WANT DRUGS NOW!" I'm much better for it.

    Anyway sorry that you're here but since you are, welcome.

    Peace and Love,
    Edie

Discussion Boards