DOES ANYONE ELSE THINK LIKE ME
Comments
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both sides
Hi Re-
I think I work both sides of the coin on this one. While I feel the gloom and doom, it is also the renewed hope for brighter days that keeps me hanging on. The hope that maybe I will someday be able to marry the girl of my dreams and have a family keep me fighting because I have the girl I just now need the dream:)
You should put those dreams to work because without them we are hopeless. Don't get me wrong I now your mindset and it is easy for me to want to hide under the covers someday and say **** you world. AND I hate the line "Cancer made me live life to the fullest" because goddamn it I was doing fine living life until cancer came.
You aren't alone. I tell my girlfriend all the time you will never understand what it is like to wake up and be surprised to see the sun another day. But if the sun is there Re, why not bask in it?
Adam0 -
Hey Re, long time no chat.
Hey Re. Just got back from some time away from the site and noticed your post here and had to echo the others when they said 'you aren't alone' at all. Since my diagnosis over 20 years ago I guess that thought of 'what if' comes and goes and negativity becomes far more familiar a state now and again than it did prior to diagnosis.
Like you I am a pretty positive person but the facts are still there, cancer is a serious disease and so it makes total sense that the mind will go there now and again. Trick is to try and pull out as soon as you can when you find yourself getting into that negative slot.
It's a well known part of the process of grief and we grieve the health we lost so it will come up from time to time. You are a strong person with many coping skills I know from reading your posts over the years and I know you will fight through the negativity. Having cancer come back even once is a great struggle but you have had your share and then some so it makes sense that negativity seeps in, I think it would be weirder if it didn't. Just don't get stuck in it and if you can't get out yourself then you know when to look to professionals for help, I have had to do that now and again when things pile up, nothing wrong with that.
We have all been subjected earlier than others to the concept of our eventual demise like others with life threatening situations and with that goes negativity so please don't think it's just you cause it isn't. It's completely natural. I hope I have managed to say something to help you get over yet another rough spot in your journey.
Blessings, Bluerose0 -
My broken watch
RE,
I inherited a gold Longines from an uncle that was in need of cleaning and adjustment right about the time I was undergoing treatment and found myself thinking, "Why bother, I may not live long enough to wear it!" I had the watch repaired, but it has since lost its crystal and sweep hand. However, it is still ticking and so am I!
Love, Courage, and Peace of Mind!
Rick0
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