update on Ed

Congratulations on your 25th!!!!!
Linda,

I hope both you and Ed have a wonderful time at the party. 25 years is no small accomplishment even under the best of circumstances. I know this has been a difficult journey, particularly over the last few months.

I know when I was recovering from surgery and going through chemotherapy there were days when I was so focused on how bad I felt and how frustrated I was that I could not do even simple things I used to be able to do; I lost sight of how fortunate I was that I had a partner and caregiver to help me. There were times when I became frustrated with my wife and she became frustrated with me. But at least once a week I would wake up in the middle of the night and look at my wife sleeping next to me and thank God that she was there. Sometimes I even remembered to tell her that the next day, but not as often as I should have!!!

I think feeling sick and helpless for an extended period of time changes all of us. During those times when we are feeling better it makes us much more humble and appreciative of the people around us. I know Ed appreciates that you are there for him. The pain, dizziness, and frustration with inability to do things gets in the way of expressing it; but I am sure it is there.

I will be praying that you and Ed have a wonderful time at the party, and that the direction of Ed’s treatment takes a more positive direction over the next few days. Congratulations on your 25th !!!!

Best Regards,

Paul Adams
McCormick, South Carolina

DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0
12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
2/8 – 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
6/21/2010 CT Scan NED

lindadanis said:

I'm afraid!!!!
Hi William, I'm afraid of what you have to say!!!! I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing????? Yes, I am also praying that we have a good day tomorrow. We have not had a good day in almost a year!!!! I'm sure you understand that sentence hah?
Just family and a few friends, Like I said in my post, I am trying to remember my husband before last October, when we had a life. This past year seems like a horror movie in my mind, I keep going over and over it, night after night, and it just seems all the same to me.
Ed's doctor is a little mad, cannot say I blame him, Ed has been quite the challenge for this poor oncologist!!!
Cannot wait to hear from you again Wiliam.

Linda

Happy 25th!
Hi Linda and Ed
Glad to hear Ed is doing a little better since the med change. You all have a wonderful time at your party! Live for today. God bless you and may he bring you 25 more years together!
Tina

crystalbay said:

Do not judge.........
I couldn't agree with you more, Linda. My own experience with cancer has shown me that when nausea grips me, I am NOT the person I really am. I get quiet, irritable, still, and don't want to interact with anyone. It's as though my very spirit has been drained from my body and all that's left is a mere shadow or physical representation of the former me. I can't imagine how difficult this is on care-givers!!! I have no one to perform this role, which is why I've been forced to spend two months in skilled or semi-skilled care. Your husband is so blessed to have you. Imagine where he'd be without you?

Hang in there - you're an angel right here on earth!

Nancy

I'm sooo Proud of you!!
Linda,

Am am so proud of you for standing up for the protection of your husband's honor when it counts. Ed was your protector in the past...and it is your turn to be his protector. For better or for worse...right? Many of us on this site say we are Christians...with that comes love, support, prayers, and understanding...I hope we are people who you can lean on during difficult times and not the ones who cause you to fall. Love your husband with all that you have for however long you have him to love. Stay strong, Linda...this is a difficult road...but you can do it!!

Susie

lindadanis said:

thanks Susie
Thanks Susie for your wonderful comments, yes, he is my husband, good or bad, and I need to do the right thing, someday I have to look in the mirror and know deep in my heart that I was a good wife no matter what. I am not saying that Ed has not been difficult, yes he has, but I do wonder if that brain tumor was there for sometime since he would never have a scan before a month ago when he was having problems. I think of you often, about Lyle and how difficult is must be for you. You, too, were a wonderful wife and I admire you for all you did for him. Life throws us curveballs, we just have to take them as they come and do what is best. We had our 25th anniversary party this past weekend, it went off well, ed almost ended up back in the hospital the day before, he is having some severe blood pressure problems that he doctor is trying to figure out. Not sure what is going on, they increased his b/p med's, increased his decardrone for swelling of the brain and we see him this thursday to see if it did anything. everyday is another day, another problem, on top of this, my poor mom has end stage copd, congestive heart issues, etc., etc., so I have a full plate going all the time. I believe that I have received quite a bit of understanding on this network and I appreciate all of it. If you would ever like to email me privately, please let me know Susie ok. I think you are my hero, I admire you so much.

thanks for writing,

Linda

Great to hear the party went well
Linda,

I have been thinking about you and Ed this past weekend. I am glad to hear the party went well. You both deserve some positive time.

I am sorry to hear about your Mom.

I hope you and Ed get some better answers from the doctors on your next visit. I had lots of blood pressure problems when I was on chemotherapy but they seemed to resolve after I finished. I learned to do my own checking on drug interactions. One of the medications my oncologist gave me for diarrhea interacted with the medication my primary care physician prescribed for blood pressure and my blood pressure became abnormally low. They couldn’t figure out what was going on until I happened to refill both of them on the same day and the druggist pointed it out to us. So I learned my lesson and started checking drug interactions on my own. If Ed has been given some new meds in combination with his existing medications it might be worth checking out.

I will be praying that things get better for Ed.

Best Regards,

Paul Adams
McCormick, South Carolina

DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0 – Stage IIB
12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
2/8 – 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
6/21/2010 CT Scan NED