Not good news

Ellie_E
Ellie_E Member Posts: 50
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
Jim has been having extreme pain in his left leg this week. The dr. sent us to the emergency room yesterday morning to have a CT scan to see if anything was pressing. The results showed that he now has tumors on his spine that are pressing on his sciatic nerve, so he started radiation yesterday to try to shrink them. He also has mets to the liver and numerous lymph nodes. He has had 14 rounds of different chemos and we thought he was stable. He is Stage IVb and is trying hard to fight this monster. He always seems positive, and I love him for that, but sometimes I just get so depressed and I don't want to bring him down. Yesterday when we heard about the spine, I had to leave the room and couldn't stop crying- I call it having a moment. I hate to see him in pain and wish I could take some of it from him. Sorry to vent, I think I'm just tired, we haven't had much sleep this week. Thank you all for listening.

Ellie

Comments

  • Lylesmyprince
    Lylesmyprince Member Posts: 130
    #2
    Ellie
    I can really relate with you...especially in the "having a moment". Lyle has really had quite a struggle the last two weeks but seems to be coming home tomorrow. Keep your chin up, Kiddo! I know it's tough...and you love him soooo much!! Praying for you!! Hard!!

    Susie
  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,392 Member
    #3
    We all need a "moment" now and then
    Ellie,

    Sorry to hear the news about the tumors on Jim's spine. Sometimes things just catch up to us and we need to take some time to be sad and angry and have a good "vent". Then when we are done we need to take some time to take care of ourselves so we can support those who need us.

    It sounds like Jim has the right attitude to continue the fight. I will be praying that the radiation quickly shrinks the tumors with minimal side effects.

    Best Regards,

    Paul Adams
    AKA: "paul61"
    McCormick, South Carolina
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #4
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • K_ann1015
    K_ann1015 Member Posts: 500
    #5
    you are strong to have a "moment" (or even a few!)
    Ellis,
    you are strong to have a "moment" (or even a few!) Many facing what you and Jim are --would be in much worse shape and not even able to function! What you have experienced is beyond what people outside of this diagnosis of EC even contemplate---so to here all the scary details---you DESERVE at one Moment!!!!!---maybe even a few!. But use them wisely---you never know when you really need one--if you know what I mean!

    Just wanted you to know---that we all ---understand. In a way that is sad---but then again (glass half - full) it is a nice thing for someone to really understand those feelings & fears---oh and sometimes--triumphs.
    Take one hell of a deep breath and get down to business---after the "moment" passes ---of course...
    Kim
    (been know to have my own moments)
  • Ellie_E
    Ellie_E Member Posts: 50
    #6
    K_ann1015 said:

    you are strong to have a "moment" (or even a few!)
    Ellis,
    you are strong to have a "moment" (or even a few!) Many facing what you and Jim are --would be in much worse shape and not even able to function! What you have experienced is beyond what people outside of this diagnosis of EC even contemplate---so to here all the scary details---you DESERVE at one Moment!!!!!---maybe even a few!. But use them wisely---you never know when you really need one--if you know what I mean!

    Just wanted you to know---that we all ---understand. In a way that is sad---but then again (glass half - full) it is a nice thing for someone to really understand those feelings & fears---oh and sometimes--triumphs.
    Take one hell of a deep breath and get down to business---after the "moment" passes ---of course...
    Kim
    (been know to have my own moments)

    Thanks everyone for all your
    Thanks everyone for all your good thoughts. Today is a better day, the pain meds seem to be working. It is so comforting to know you are there for venting. My friends and family are great but I don't want to burden them, especially our sons. Our oldest son, Mike, lives in Massachusetts with his wife and 3 sons and I know it is eating at him that he can't be here all the time. He comes when he can and will come in a minute if I ask. I promised him that when we need him I will call. He calls all the time and wants daily updates. We are blessed with a large family on Jim's side-he has 3 brothers and 3 sisters, but they also have had their brushes with cancer. He had 2 sisters who passed away from lung cancer when they were 48 and 49. One brother had EC 10 years ago and has survived; another had protate cancer, his oldest sister right now has lymphoma, and another one had breast and cervical cancer. So we are quite familiar with how cancer works. I think of Lori's saying often as I pull up MY BIG GIRL PANTIES one more time. Again, thanks for being there,

    Ellie
  • Tina Blondek
    Tina Blondek Member Posts: 1,500 Member
    #7
    Ellie_E said:

    Thanks everyone for all your
    Thanks everyone for all your good thoughts. Today is a better day, the pain meds seem to be working. It is so comforting to know you are there for venting. My friends and family are great but I don't want to burden them, especially our sons. Our oldest son, Mike, lives in Massachusetts with his wife and 3 sons and I know it is eating at him that he can't be here all the time. He comes when he can and will come in a minute if I ask. I promised him that when we need him I will call. He calls all the time and wants daily updates. We are blessed with a large family on Jim's side-he has 3 brothers and 3 sisters, but they also have had their brushes with cancer. He had 2 sisters who passed away from lung cancer when they were 48 and 49. One brother had EC 10 years ago and has survived; another had protate cancer, his oldest sister right now has lymphoma, and another one had breast and cervical cancer. So we are quite familiar with how cancer works. I think of Lori's saying often as I pull up MY BIG GIRL PANTIES one more time. Again, thanks for being there,

    Ellie

    I am Always Here Too
    Hi Ellie
    Just wanted you to know that my ears are always open to you, as well as my shoulder for you to lay your head on. My heart goes out to both you and Jim. You have both been such hard fighters, such great inspirations to all of us here. "When the going gets tough, the tough get going!" That is you two for sure. I am glad to hear that the pain meds are helping. Do keep your chins up, keep fighting, the chemo and radiation will do its job. I will be praying for you! I lost my dad in March to this ec, but I love to come to these boards daily to help people like you. That helps me. Peace.
    Tina

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