I CANNOT quit crying, this is stupid, i don't know what to do. I just can't friggin stop!!!! Help m
Jennie
Comments
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Jennie
Sorry but I don't have a clue what to do. Sounds like you are going through withdrawl. Perhaps someone who went through withdrawl with either pills, alcohol or such can be of more help. I hate hearing this kind of crap like cancer and the poison was not enough.
Kerry will probably come on and say sex and booze........and there is a tractor involved somehow.......
Hugs- Tina0 -
Withdrawal sucks
Jennie,
I had to taper off of Tramadol over about 4 weeks - I understand. I cursed with every scheduled pill - I wanted to go cold turkey, but my body couldn't take it. I cut down by one pill every 5 days. We take these drugs because we need them to get through the pain, and then the pain of dropping them is hell on its own.
You're not crazy - check with your onc, your primary care, your pharmacist, a psychiatrist about what you can take to provide mental support while your body releases its grip on oxycodone. Seeing a psychiatrist, who can work with meds as well as emotions might be advisable at this time. Btw, my insurance lists as a separate reason for seeing a shrink "cancer" - we need all the help in all fronts that we can get. You might even want to look into acupuncture or other alternate/complementary therapies.
And sometimes, having had cancer, we just cry - it's the way of the beast. It's unfair. We've been through hell, why me, is it coming back, what's next....
Explain to your husband that you are going through a rough spell, stopping meds is very difficult, and ask him to hold you.
You will get past this, even tho it seems hopeless now.
Big hugs, Jennie. This stage of hell will pass.
Alice0 -
Hey little buddy
Hey little buddy, you have already made the first step. You know you have a problem with the damn pills. I would even bet money that as soon as you posted you felt better about the problem and yourself. Feeling good is damn nice with what we all have been through. But like most “feel goods”, we have to pay a price down the road. Two docs have told me, if you feel high after taking them you did not need them. If you have heavy duty pain and you take them, you will just feel normal. That has proven to be true with me.
So the second step is to do something about it. Keep on tapering off the damn stuff. Talk to the doc about it. You are not alone in this. We are all with you darlin. You are going to climb the walls for awhile. Just understand why.
Kerry0 -
Vitaminsgeotina said:Jennie
Sorry but I don't have a clue what to do. Sounds like you are going through withdrawl. Perhaps someone who went through withdrawl with either pills, alcohol or such can be of more help. I hate hearing this kind of crap like cancer and the poison was not enough.
Kerry will probably come on and say sex and booze........and there is a tractor involved somehow.......
Hugs- Tina
Their are some Vitamins that *might* help that are given at rehab clinics. As the daughter of a recovering alcoholic I remember that much but don't know what they are. Someone else might know? I want to say b-12 but I'm not sure...
Please hang in there Jennie. I have seen withdrawal and I know it hurts, mentally & physically, but I know you can do it.
I'm pulling for you Jennie!!
-Pat0 -
Jen:)
Hi, Jennie
Words of wisdom abound in this thread. Everyone has very sound advice here. Withdrawal sounds like the culprit here.
Just go with it and let your feelings out - will be better than trying to hold it all in.
I'm sorry to hear you hurting so, but at least you've got an audience here where you can talk about it. As with most things, time will help this all pass.
Just think about Palooza when you can - you know how much you are looking forward to that. You'll be a new woman by the time the dates roll around.
-Craig0 -
SOUNDS LIKE HELL!
You are such a strong person, I hate to see you having such a hard time. I have to echo what others have said here, perhaps a visit with a psychiatrist to see what kind of supporting meds you can get to get you past this withdrawal will help! I think probably in addition to withdrawal, coming off the oxy is probably allowing your body to feel emotions you weren't able to feel before. Sometimes, everything just catches up with us and the body has to release the stress. I am with you on the hating to cry thing, but I have learned to go with it when it comes and just move on! I haven't died yet from crying, so I don't think it's going to happen in the future either
Keep at it one hour at a time and soon you will be where you want to be, no longer dependent on oxy. Ask your doc about your schedule on the ativan, you might be taking it too often. I find that Ativan is wonderful for handling anxiety and for sleepless nights, but I find myself weepy the next day after taking it; so this might be adding to your issues. Keep us posted, ok?
P.S. coming up on that mangled deer leg would TOTALLY set me off too! EEEEEWWWWWWWW!
mary0 -
Jennie -
They had me on a constant Hydrocodone drip 24/7 and I could have
even more, if and when I cared to hit the button.... (which was all the time)
That was for the entire three+ weeks of ICU. I was superman! Nothing
was about to keep me down.
When they moved me into the "stepdown", they stopped the
Hydrocodone "cold-turkey". They removed my water jug from
my arm and left me alone in my room.
Within three days of not eating, or drinking and crying, sobbing
and wasting away from dehydration, they finally noticed that I had
such a low BP that I had no pulse they could detect.
The depression was overwhelming, and they offered me nothing for it,
except counseling with a nurse that gave me hospice forms to fill out
and hospice brochures to read. They even called in a minister to
give me blessings for my "trip home".
I prayed to what I thought was a cloud that never seemed to move
from the corner of my window...... I found out later, just prior to
leaving, that it was a blob of phlegm or something on the glass...
I guess it had some sort of mystical powers tho, because I'm still
here being the pain in the **** I've always been, and I don't think
I could have made it without that blob of phlegm.
It's the drugs, babe. Everything is depressing enough by itself,
but coming off those damned pain killers will drive you down harder
than a jack-hammer.
Try to relax, you're coming from a spot where many, many before
you have been. Just try to think of something funny, and cry about
as much as you feel like. It will get better as time passed, trust me.
So when you see a blob of phlegm someplace, think of me, ok?
Get better.
John.0 -
This comment has been removed by the ModeratorJohn23 said:Jennie -
They had me on a constant Hydrocodone drip 24/7 and I could have
even more, if and when I cared to hit the button.... (which was all the time)
That was for the entire three+ weeks of ICU. I was superman! Nothing
was about to keep me down.
When they moved me into the "stepdown", they stopped the
Hydrocodone "cold-turkey". They removed my water jug from
my arm and left me alone in my room.
Within three days of not eating, or drinking and crying, sobbing
and wasting away from dehydration, they finally noticed that I had
such a low BP that I had no pulse they could detect.
The depression was overwhelming, and they offered me nothing for it,
except counseling with a nurse that gave me hospice forms to fill out
and hospice brochures to read. They even called in a minister to
give me blessings for my "trip home".
I prayed to what I thought was a cloud that never seemed to move
from the corner of my window...... I found out later, just prior to
leaving, that it was a blob of phlegm or something on the glass...
I guess it had some sort of mystical powers tho, because I'm still
here being the pain in the **** I've always been, and I don't think
I could have made it without that blob of phlegm.
It's the drugs, babe. Everything is depressing enough by itself,
but coming off those damned pain killers will drive you down harder
than a jack-hammer.
Try to relax, you're coming from a spot where many, many before
you have been. Just try to think of something funny, and cry about
as much as you feel like. It will get better as time passed, trust me.
So when you see a blob of phlegm someplace, think of me, ok?
Get better.
John.0 -
Hi Jennieunknown said:This comment has been removed by the Moderator
I work at a drug
Hi Jennie
I work at a drug and alcohol agency so I am familiar with these drugs. The withdrawal from the oxy is terrible for most people. There is a drug called suboxone which is used specifically to assist people in qutting the opiates (which is your oxy). I would ask about that. Many people have great sucess with that. As for the Ativan, it might be ok for now, b ut it is also a highly addictive drug and you might get off the oxy, but be addicted to the ativan. I would ask your doc if suboxone would be a possibility for you.
Good luck. I know it is very hard. You can pm me with any ?'s if you want.
Amy0 -
Awwww
Feeling so bad for you and wish that this transition would just go away very soon. Glad you have a supporting husband though. Come on this board when you are able and post away that should help. You being able to take your mind off that will help somewhat, but you are doing the right thing in tapering off. My thoughts are with you dear as you struggle through this. Wish my hug could reach across the internet because you would have one big one from me.
Kim0 -
ativan
You may want to talk to the doctor,I gave up the pain killer cold turkey,and besides the ativan twice a day,I take zoloft once a day.At first it was hard,and took a month to completely get off the vicoden,and it helped to be in open spaces as much as possible.It will take time,but you can do it,just don't give up.0 -
Honey Bunny....karguy said:ativan
You may want to talk to the doctor,I gave up the pain killer cold turkey,and besides the ativan twice a day,I take zoloft once a day.At first it was hard,and took a month to completely get off the vicoden,and it helped to be in open spaces as much as possible.It will take time,but you can do it,just don't give up.
I only take one Oxycontin a day,(they want me to take 3), and one ativan at night. I used to take more, but started to just "lessen" the amounts, and it's been a little hard, not to bad, because now I sometimes get these headaches, and itchyness and know it's from trying to taper off, but I just keep thinking, it be best for the liver also to get off them. I seem to now try to take them only if I need them, I quit smoking cold turkey 7 years ago, and I will quit these cold turkey if I have too, I don't know how you take those ativans 4 times a day, those knock me out, maybe that's the cause of you sleeping so much as well, maybe cutting those down will help alot, and take it just an hour before bedtime.
The cravings do go away though, give it a couple weeks, you'll get through this, just a little at a time, we all have our faith in you. I wish I was there to give ya a big hug! You'll have alot of fun at Palooza, and will make lots of happy memories and more friends, and can't wait to hear about it. You will kick this!
Hugsss!
~Donna0 -
my dear
My dear Jennie,
I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Although I don't have any experience or info to offer on the withdrawal, I just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you, pulling for you, and praying for you.
You hang in there- you WILL get through this!
Hugs,
Lisa0 -
Hang tough
Jennie,
Hang tough girl. Life is good and you can even fart w/out a problem. I mean wowsers, count your blessings.
Really, I hope your current mood passes quickly, you have enough going on without having to deal with emotions run amuck too.
You know what might bring a smile to your face? Let one rip for each of us that posted in response to your entry, especially those of us who can't and perhaps in return we will respond with a bit of unbridled emotion of our own. Odds are it will be laughter and not tears, but we are a sympathetic bunch and you will have to take what we can offer.0 -
Well ****!!
Pardon my french as they say, but this as you know suckss!!! I wish I could help ya, but I think as others have said and as is so often the case it takes time. Just what you wanted to hear right. I know you are hurting, frustrated, and the worse part is probably just the fact that as you said you know this isnt you! I dont have any magic wand, Lord knows I wish I did, but I want you to realize there are so many people on this board, and in your life, that believe in you, they know this isnt you, and you have to remember this is not permanent. Dont believe for a second that it is, Cry, kick your damn feet, go throw a hundred ice cubes against the wall outside (stress relief without the mess or injury), sleep and NEVER forget that while you may feel like you are losing a battle you are winning the WAR!! I wish there was something I could do, these types of posts tear at my heart, I get it, and it really infuriates me. sometimes you just feel like enough already! Hold on one more day, dont let the darkness block out the goal you have worked so hard towards. You will win this, you have proven countless times before this you are one tough cookie.
If there is something I can do please dont hesitate to ask?
sending you good vibes, prayers and hope for peace soon!
Chris0 -
one other thinggreybeard64 said:Well ****!!
Pardon my french as they say, but this as you know suckss!!! I wish I could help ya, but I think as others have said and as is so often the case it takes time. Just what you wanted to hear right. I know you are hurting, frustrated, and the worse part is probably just the fact that as you said you know this isnt you! I dont have any magic wand, Lord knows I wish I did, but I want you to realize there are so many people on this board, and in your life, that believe in you, they know this isnt you, and you have to remember this is not permanent. Dont believe for a second that it is, Cry, kick your damn feet, go throw a hundred ice cubes against the wall outside (stress relief without the mess or injury), sleep and NEVER forget that while you may feel like you are losing a battle you are winning the WAR!! I wish there was something I could do, these types of posts tear at my heart, I get it, and it really infuriates me. sometimes you just feel like enough already! Hold on one more day, dont let the darkness block out the goal you have worked so hard towards. You will win this, you have proven countless times before this you are one tough cookie.
If there is something I can do please dont hesitate to ask?
sending you good vibes, prayers and hope for peace soon!
Chris
I do not know how the board feels about this, and since we dont live in a state that sees the advantages (although it is up for a vote soon) I feel compelled to tell you. Marijuanna is a great stress reliever, stomach calmer, pain reliever etc.. I had to throw that out there, if I offended anyone with this post....well I was going to say sorry...but I cant make myself do that.
And of course if the powers that be are perusing this site: I only know this through what I have read, as someone once said, I may have tried it once years ago, but I never inhaled. After all its illegal and I would never do anything illegal even if it does, repress nausea from chemo, allows you to eat during treatments when other drugs wont, calms frazzled nerves, alleviates anxiety, allows your body to get the rest it needs through normal sleep, and does all of this with far less side effects then pharmacy concoctions, and with no possibility of overdose.
PS I dont subscribe to legalizing it UNLESS it is for medical reasons, and it should be monitored just as strictly as the narcotics they prescribe now.
again just my two cents take it or leave it.
chris0 -
amengreybeard64 said:one other thing
I do not know how the board feels about this, and since we dont live in a state that sees the advantages (although it is up for a vote soon) I feel compelled to tell you. Marijuanna is a great stress reliever, stomach calmer, pain reliever etc.. I had to throw that out there, if I offended anyone with this post....well I was going to say sorry...but I cant make myself do that.
And of course if the powers that be are perusing this site: I only know this through what I have read, as someone once said, I may have tried it once years ago, but I never inhaled. After all its illegal and I would never do anything illegal even if it does, repress nausea from chemo, allows you to eat during treatments when other drugs wont, calms frazzled nerves, alleviates anxiety, allows your body to get the rest it needs through normal sleep, and does all of this with far less side effects then pharmacy concoctions, and with no possibility of overdose.
PS I dont subscribe to legalizing it UNLESS it is for medical reasons, and it should be monitored just as strictly as the narcotics they prescribe now.
again just my two cents take it or leave it.
chris
that's all I got to say about that, Chris!
mary0
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