15 and struggling

crovn
crovn Member Posts: 22
edited March 2014 in Emotional Support #1
I am 15 and my mom was diagnosed with Brain Cancer 10 months ago. It has really been hard on me, since my mom has always ment the world to me. I have been struggling with a lot of changes and been going through depression. I don't know if anyone, maybe around my age, can relate to me, but I have been feeling really alone lately. I have been feeling like no one can understand what I feel and what I am going through. My so called "bestfriend" hasn't been there for me, and I can't go through this alone.

- Courtney

Comments

  • terato
    terato Member Posts: 375
    #2
    Seek support!
    Courtney,

    You are correct about needing people your own age to relate with about this. If your mother's treatment center has a social worker, ask about support groups for teen caregivers or children of cancer patients. Your place of worship or community center might have similar resources. Also, check out your local unit of the American Cancer Society. You will, eventually, find others experiencing the same issues.

    Love, Courage, and Peace of Mind!

    Rick
  • Barbara53
    Barbara53 Member Posts: 652
    #3
    brain cancer forum?
    Courtney, please come here all you want, and let us be part of your temporary family. You might also post in the brain cancer forum, especially if you get scared about specific symptoms. My mother has ovarian cancer, and the children of women fighting the disease often get "adopted" by the teal warriors in the ovarian cancer forum.

    Do you have an aunt, grandmother or neighbor you might start talking with, who shares your fears and sorrows? People your age DO have trouble relating because death is so, so remote. On the other hand, you DO need someone to back you up.

    Your school counselor might be the easiest person to ask about professional help if you feel like your depression is getting unmanageable. You will get through this, one day at a time.
  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    #4
    Not Alone
    Don't even try to go through this alone! You need to find help. Ask your school counselor to help you. Call the American Cancer Society 800 number and ask how they can help. Of course you are depressed and I'm betting you are scared, too. Don't discount the help you can get from adults either. They can listen and find you others who can help. Sadly, many young adults are facing cancer in a parent. Cancer sucks for the whole family. There is help available but you need to ask for it. You have already found this board. Come here often to read the stories of others and share yours. But this is not enough. Tell the adults around you that you need help dealing. Most will understand. Take care, Fay
  • crovn
    crovn Member Posts: 22
    #5
    Barbara53 said:

    brain cancer forum?
    Courtney, please come here all you want, and let us be part of your temporary family. You might also post in the brain cancer forum, especially if you get scared about specific symptoms. My mother has ovarian cancer, and the children of women fighting the disease often get "adopted" by the teal warriors in the ovarian cancer forum.

    Do you have an aunt, grandmother or neighbor you might start talking with, who shares your fears and sorrows? People your age DO have trouble relating because death is so, so remote. On the other hand, you DO need someone to back you up.

    Your school counselor might be the easiest person to ask about professional help if you feel like your depression is getting unmanageable. You will get through this, one day at a time.

    My school counselor already
    My school counselor already knows about problems I have been having, and what my family is going through. I just posted something in the brain cancer fourm.

    I haven't really talked to an aunt, grandmother, or neighboor. I am not close with my aunts or neighbors. My grandmother I am close with, but she is 93 and has no idea what is going on. So, I really have just been talking to my therapist. I started going to one because of some other things, but she has been trying to find me support groups.

    Thanks,
    Courtney
  • chumley
    chumley Member Posts: 5
    #6
    Courtney,
    You can and will
    Courtney,
    You can and will get through this. Ask your mom's doctor if there is a counselor, cause me at 45, I didn't understand anything about my dad's cancer. Call, leave messages, post on this website. I really believe you can and will get through this.
    Chum
  • GregStahl
    GregStahl Member Posts: 188
    #7
    My second time
    Courtney

    I was 7yrs old(1973) when my was diagnosed and 14 (1980) when she passed so I have been in your shoes.
    Now I find myself fighting this with my wife. She was diagnosed with breast cancer 4/20 so we are just starting.
    Your friends may pull away some what since dealing with something like this is foreign to them. Its not you, they dont know what to say or really how to help.

    I would suggest contacting your local office of the American cancer society and see what support groups they have. Talk to your mom/dad, brothers/sisters, grand parents, school counselors, etc. The support is there and easier to find than it seems. You will probably find that many kids in your school have a parent fighting this as well. As many have already said, you have support here from all of us.

    Good luck, stay strong, and if you need us, we are all here to help, listen, and advise.
    Greg
  • abrub
    abrub Member Posts: 2,174 Member
    #8
    Places for support
    Courtney, the American Cancer Society is a great place to start. Also see if there is a Gilda's Club near you. They have cancer support groups geared to kids and teens, and are another wonderful resource.

    I'm glad you have a therapist; you need someone you can fully open up to.

    Take care. This is not going to be easy.
  • StillWaiting
    StillWaiting Member Posts: 1
    #9
    Hang in there
    I'm 15 and going through a similar hell.
    My Dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last December, a very treatable tumour. However his surgeon found the operation too risky so left it there and treated it with chemo. The tumour shrunk, but my dad's got lesions all over his liver.
    I can see him dying in front of me, and I know it won't be much longer now.
    I've got no one to talk to and would love to get in touch with you.

    -StillWaiting

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