UPDATE****We Need Prayers

I'm writing this from my iPhone on the way back from Syracuse, NY. My husband was scheduled for his third chemo treatment. It didn't happen. Instead his doctor told him that ge has from maybe 4 weeks to 6 months to live. She said that his bilirubin us 12, his CEA is over 20,000. I'm in a car with no tissue, so trying hard not to cry to much. I might have to use my shirt. Right now I am in shock and really can't even pray but I know that's what will help me through this. I know God has a plan for all of us, but right now I am so devastated, I can barely think straight. Than again, I am a very practical person and in a little while we will have to start making plans. We are on the verge if having to give up our home. Damn. This is just so hard! My friend is driving and she wants me to just fall apart, but I can't yet. We're too fall from home. Well, I guess that's all for now. I can't be politically correct right now. I need your prayers right now.
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Hi all,

We just got back from the dr's office, and CB says this was most definately different from yesterday. First, his bilirubin is 12, but instead of a CEA level of 20,000, it's actually 2,000. Chemo brain strikes again. So, after talking all last night, and getting a good nights sleep, I asked CB what he would do if it was me that had gotten this news. He said that he would fight it with everything he has, do research, call any and everybody to try to save my life. My question to him is why he doesn't feel that his life is as valuable? Why he is willing to chuck it in, settle his affairs, and go sit somewhere and wait to die? I always talk about you all. I talk about how Lisa advocated for herself and got the insurance company to let her use Gemzar. Or eventhough Craig has had setbacks, he always advocates and puts himself in the position to get help when needed. Or how Kimby nearly died last year. How there are people on here that was one step from hospice, and was able to fight back. That's what I want for CB, and I believe that's what he now wants for himself. The doctor said that she wasn't sure of what else she could do. CB remembered reading about a test that uses the original biopsied piece of liver and can be used to see what chemo drugs his particular liver is sensitive to. It's called the Karis dx diagnostic test. She is going to fast track that to our insurance companies and see if we can get that done. I again mentioned Gemzar, and she of course said again that it wasn't approved for colorectal cancer. I told her about Lisa and her doctors advocating and eventually getting it approved. I am going to try that also, and she did say that if the test came back that he is sensitive to Gemzar, then she would be able to give that to him. In the meantime, he will continue to go to her weekly, and will treat any symptons that might arise. He still has almost 60 of the Xeloda pills, and she told him not to take them right now. At this point he is in pretty good shape. He still has an appetite, and still gets around pretty good. She said that it was possible that as the cancer progresses, he would lose his appetite, and be totally fatigued. He could have fluid build up, which they could relieve. She also said that it is possible that the chemo drugs are contributing to the jaundice.Because he is still seeking treatment, he is not eligible for Hospice, and he doesn't feel like he's ready for that step. I am going online to seek out other doctors and facilities. MSK says they can't do anything for him because he has already exhausted all of the chemo treatments. If any of you have any ideas, please do not hesitate to share them. For us, and others on the board. I'll update later with what I find out. Have a great day everyone!

Thanks,

Carolyn