Now how am I going to live-post treatment

thready
thready Member Posts: 474
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
I finished treatment on 4/14/10. I am so glad it is done although I still have to deal with the ickies of the last treatment. But I am trying to figure out what my new life will be like. O.K. there are people who don't want me to look to far forward because I scan on 5/10/10 and that is when I should plan things, but I can't help but think about how I want life to be.

Just wondering how others lives might have changed. I am even considering giving up my day job and doing things I enjoy!

Let me know that you all have done!
Thanks
Jan

Comments

  • RickMurtagh
    RickMurtagh Member Posts: 587 Member
    post treatment
    for me post treatment means everything is going to change. I finished January 27, 2010, but I still have my takedown on Tuesday, a couple of nodules on my lung to watch and a job to find. I have been living on unemployment and my 401K, which I had to cash in early, to continue living in our home and finish treatment. All that HAS to change soon. Since I have no debts except the mortgage, we don't know what we will do or where we will go.
    My brain has not faired the chemo very well and I am not sure I can continue as a programmer. It is just harder to learn new languages. I might go back to school and become a nurse, since at fifty becoming a doctor would probably take too much time and perhaps more brain power than I currently possess.
    I wan to travel a bit with my wife and visit family and friends I have not seen in some time. I am not sure how I am going to pay for that, but that is my desire. I have come to realize I have been very isolated from people since my cancer journey began. Mostly from my fear of dropping a bag of poop on their living room floor or something like that.
    Until I am post takedown and have at least one all clear scan, I can't even think of dreaming about it.
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member

    post treatment
    for me post treatment means everything is going to change. I finished January 27, 2010, but I still have my takedown on Tuesday, a couple of nodules on my lung to watch and a job to find. I have been living on unemployment and my 401K, which I had to cash in early, to continue living in our home and finish treatment. All that HAS to change soon. Since I have no debts except the mortgage, we don't know what we will do or where we will go.
    My brain has not faired the chemo very well and I am not sure I can continue as a programmer. It is just harder to learn new languages. I might go back to school and become a nurse, since at fifty becoming a doctor would probably take too much time and perhaps more brain power than I currently possess.
    I wan to travel a bit with my wife and visit family and friends I have not seen in some time. I am not sure how I am going to pay for that, but that is my desire. I have come to realize I have been very isolated from people since my cancer journey began. Mostly from my fear of dropping a bag of poop on their living room floor or something like that.
    Until I am post takedown and have at least one all clear scan, I can't even think of dreaming about it.

    Jan.......
    at first it will feel like everyone has abandoned you because there are no more treatments to go to on a regular basis. Only the 3 month checkups and blood draws. But that is what we battled for right, for back to as much normalcy as possible given the situation. The new normal will soon become a way of life and actually take on its normal to where you will start to actually really live again and slowly progress to where cancer or the thought of it doesn't dictate your every move. Life is becoming wonderful for me again so I will enjoy every minute of it...only because I now know how quick it can be lost.....My neuropathy is almost all gone and my aches and pains are almost nil...Life will slowly get better for you every day. Don't be in a hurry to get strength back, it will take a while. I am 1 year out of post op chemo and am just now feeling strong again...allow plenty of time to heal and let the body tell you when its ready for something new...Most of all, enjoy your freedom, you have certainly deserved it.........Love and Hope to you.....Buzz
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    Buzzard said:

    Jan.......
    at first it will feel like everyone has abandoned you because there are no more treatments to go to on a regular basis. Only the 3 month checkups and blood draws. But that is what we battled for right, for back to as much normalcy as possible given the situation. The new normal will soon become a way of life and actually take on its normal to where you will start to actually really live again and slowly progress to where cancer or the thought of it doesn't dictate your every move. Life is becoming wonderful for me again so I will enjoy every minute of it...only because I now know how quick it can be lost.....My neuropathy is almost all gone and my aches and pains are almost nil...Life will slowly get better for you every day. Don't be in a hurry to get strength back, it will take a while. I am 1 year out of post op chemo and am just now feeling strong again...allow plenty of time to heal and let the body tell you when its ready for something new...Most of all, enjoy your freedom, you have certainly deserved it.........Love and Hope to you.....Buzz

    Buzz is absolutely right!!!!! Don't know how you and I compare
    as far as negative results of treatments go but considering all the fear, anxiety, pain and suffering and continuing after effects YOU CAN GET BACK A LIFE WORTH LIVING . I live in a big city where crime is increasing again (Brooklyn,NY)so I'd feel more secure with return of my strength which I am now working on. I go where I want, basically do what I want (I know my limitations) I'm no longer confined to my bed, I walk with a cane but I can go fast and pretty far now; I can carry some things in right hand (still have picc in left arm) to help girlfiend shop and no one knows I have a bag.It does get betteer, it just takes time.

    I never thought I would live to see the day I can do what I'm doing now and my last chemo dose (4/12-14)hasn't totally left me yet.Still have problems due to chemo/rad/surgery but I try not to let it stop me from living. Most of my life (as one with a BA in History, minor is Sociology-1973)I've been "realistic", thus pessimistic except for twice in my past: when told I had COPD in 2000 I finally gave up cigarettes after 35 years of smoking because I was gonna beat the COPD (and I was, regained weight lost and regain strength). Then in May 09 when Dxed with Stage 3CRC I made up my mind that NOTHING was going to stop me from beating this too. You can slay the dragon; when, if ,it pops up again, I'll deal with it (Ive read stats!!!and alot else about CRC and current research )and beat it again. See onc end of month and know they're gonna scan me.

    I know I gotta be on the alert for future recurrences, mets (and I;m not a baseball fan so you can keep the mets away from me please!)liver, lung, heart and other potential problems
    but meanwhile I GOT A LIFE TO LIVE AND A GIRLFRIEND TO TAKE CARE OF. CANNCER CAN WAIT......steve
  • dianetavegia
    dianetavegia Member Posts: 1,942 Member
    Jan
    I completed chemo in Aug, so 8 months ago now. There are days I forget I even HAD cancer. If it were not for the neuropathy, it would probably be even less often. Yesterday and older woman from church called to ask me to cook for one of the 3 families who lost someone to death on Friday. She began the conversation by saying she wasn't sure if I felt like it.... I quickly cleared that up.

    I believe God spared me for a purpose and daily I ask Him to 'use me Lord', 'breathe on me', 'open my eyes to how I can help others'. It's an adventure in living!

    Diane
  • Erinb
    Erinb Member Posts: 293

    Jan
    I completed chemo in Aug, so 8 months ago now. There are days I forget I even HAD cancer. If it were not for the neuropathy, it would probably be even less often. Yesterday and older woman from church called to ask me to cook for one of the 3 families who lost someone to death on Friday. She began the conversation by saying she wasn't sure if I felt like it.... I quickly cleared that up.

    I believe God spared me for a purpose and daily I ask Him to 'use me Lord', 'breathe on me', 'open my eyes to how I can help others'. It's an adventure in living!

    Diane

    As a caregiver I felt the
    As a caregiver I felt the change immediately.Life is good! Of course I still had/have anxiety, but at the same time I try very hard to appreciate each day and treasure each gift that God has given us. My husband and I have learned to value our time together. During the time when my husband was taking Chemo I thought he felt good four days after his treatment. I didn't realize how hard it was-we just did it.
  • khl8
    khl8 Member Posts: 807
    I can honesty say that I
    I can honesty say that I felt abandoned when he treatments were done, the last chemo everyone cheered and clapped, gve me cupcakes, then sent me on my way. Once outside I realized "now what?" Where is all the support, where did everyone go? It was a bit frightening, as we all know when you have traveled this road and it is time to come home, you are not the same person who started the journey. My outlook on life changed dramatically, I used to be the one who had to have the spotless house, not anymore! who cares anyway!
    I do admit I have become selfish in a way, I am doing more for me than I did before. I still have to work, money and health insurance that I carry for the family, but I love my job so up and leaving it is not what I want. I spend more time with the ones I care about, I get out and do more things, I never put off anything for "another time". I guess it changed me to the point that wether it is cancer or soemthing else that will someday take me, I am going to enjoy every minute that I have on this earth.
    I am afraid of heights, but this summer my son is getting married in Jamaica and I am going on a Zip line tour, I am going to muster up the same courage I had when I was told I had cancer and I am going toface this fear head on!
    Enjoy your life, however you want to live it, we only get one shot at this.
    Kathy
  • abmb
    abmb Member Posts: 311
    one day at a time
    On my husband's last unhook day from chemo in Nov. 09, we celebrated by going out to lunch and spent the day just relaxing. Now each day is appreciated and not taken for granted. Each morning I wake up and Thank God for all the blessings he has given us in our life. I am not saying I don't have anxieties, especially when I know his 3 mos are up and blood work will be done, because I worry about every cough or pain he might exhibit. Over all, LIFE is GREAT, we have each other and our huge family to be thankful for. Take care, relax, live and enjoy. God Bless, margaret
  • WinneyPooh
    WinneyPooh Member Posts: 318
    Live it large
    Jan, I tell you if it was me i would live it large,
    I have just been given another year or more tacked onto my cancer treatment, I am still going to back to school in the fall and get my masters ( on what ever subject i want. I am going to keep up my art with my husband as best i can and i am going to raise my children, laugh, cry, exerises when i can and even cook food,.

    Live your life large,go do what as often as it takes to behappy, carefree and glad to be alive, don't go back to work if you don't have to, ( unless you want to) relax and enjoy life for a while

    Have fun,

    Thats what i would do.

    Live, Love, Play
    Winnie
  • msccolon
    msccolon Member Posts: 1,917 Member
    Life goes on!
    This journey changes us all, but we do learn to adjust. I don't think anybody comes out of this unchanged, but that isn't always a bad thing. Rick, I have to say that I was afraid I wouldn't be able to continue programming, but the brain power DOES come back. I don't think I could learn a NEW language, but don't have any problems dealing with the existing language I have been working in for 16 years now. Of course, whether you WANT to continue programming could be a whole other issue! I like the freedom my job gives me regarding schedule, since I work from my home. I sure wouldn't want to be looking for a new job after everything I've been through! Good luck and I am sure you will make the right decision!
    mary
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member

    Live it large
    Jan, I tell you if it was me i would live it large,
    I have just been given another year or more tacked onto my cancer treatment, I am still going to back to school in the fall and get my masters ( on what ever subject i want. I am going to keep up my art with my husband as best i can and i am going to raise my children, laugh, cry, exerises when i can and even cook food,.

    Live your life large,go do what as often as it takes to behappy, carefree and glad to be alive, don't go back to work if you don't have to, ( unless you want to) relax and enjoy life for a while

    Have fun,

    Thats what i would do.

    Live, Love, Play
    Winnie

    I raise my glass....
    I don't spend much time wondering how my life has changed...the answer is COMPLETELY!!!!

    As a result of being told 5 years ago that I had 6 months to live, and with the troubles my beau had with his heart, and stopping living for 3 minutes, well...we didn't need much more convincing that life can be over in an instant, and we needed to live life large...

    So, I retired, my beau semi-retired, and we now split the year living in 2 countries...it's grand!!!!

    Even if you just do as Winnie suggests to just take a break, then go 'back' to working full time and the rat race...you have fought and WON a HUGE battle, and NEED to take some rest time....

    My 2 cents' worth...

    Hugs and congrats!!! Kathi

    P.S.....don't listen to the nay-sayers...the best thing I ever did, emotionally, was buy new sofas for my living room....it 'bought' me into the future, my future!!! And, during my fight, I kept myself going by promising a trip to Palm Springs after my treatments...just me...did it, too!!! Sure got me thru some narly moments!!!
  • EstherMSKCC
    EstherMSKCC Member Posts: 20
    Dear Jan,Congratulations on
    Dear Jan,

    Congratulations on completing treatment! I came across your post about life after cancer. I'm an employee of Memorial Sloan-Kettering and am aware of the physical, emotional, psychological, and social issues many patients face following treatment. There are various resources available online that you may be interested in looking into.

    The National Cancer Institute is a good place to start: http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/coping/survivorship

    The American Cancer Society's information on survivors' needs and interests is also good: http://www.cancer.org/docroot/HOME/srv/srv_0.asp

    Memorial Sloan-Kettering also offers a page of recommended links that address this topic: http://www.mskcc.org/mskcc/html/58022.cfm
    We also have an electronic newsletter by and for cancer survivors that you may be interested in reading/subscribing to: http://www.mskcc.org/mskcc/html/86252.cfm

    I hope this information is useful and wish you the best of luck looking forward to life after cancer. -Esther