Decisions

slynch
slynch Member Posts: 82
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Has anyone ever made a decision about their treatment and questioned whether it is the right one or not?

I think that is why I have avoided talking to many people because I know everyone would give me their opinion as to what they would do and I would be even more confused.

I have had 3 biopsies on the right breast so when they diagnosed me with DCIS breast I have chosen mastectomy -- I just want the one with the bad "critters" as my husband calls them gone. But I sometimes wonder if this decision is too drastic. I am just tired of every 6 months mammograms and always being called back in for more tests.

How do you get past the doubt?

Comments

  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    #2
    I don't think anyone knows
    I don't think anyone knows if they made the right decision until after everything is over and we look back and then it's clear where we made mistakes. Sometimes even then it's not clear. All you can do is talk to your doctors and make the best decision you can based on how you feel and the facts. Then no matter what happens you can remember why you choose that path. This always makes me feel better.
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
    #3
    Marcia527 said:

    I don't think anyone knows
    I don't think anyone knows if they made the right decision until after everything is over and we look back and then it's clear where we made mistakes. Sometimes even then it's not clear. All you can do is talk to your doctors and make the best decision you can based on how you feel and the facts. Then no matter what happens you can remember why you choose that path. This always makes me feel better.

    The decision is yours, and,
    The decision is yours, and, your alone. You should naturally listen to what your doctor's advice is best for you, do some research, but, ultimately, you can do what you want. I also had DCIS, and, chose what my doctors suggested, which was a lumpectomy, followed by radiation treatments. A mastectomy was never mentioned as my tumor was small and you have the same recurrence and life span with a mastectomy as with rads and a lumpectomy. You can never get all of the breast tissue, even with a mastectomy as I think some think. I wanted to keep my breast if I could, and, am very happy that I could. Good luck to you in making your choice.
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
    #4
    I guess you're never 100%
    But you made the best decision you could. Your reasons for wanting a mastectomy are perfectly valid and I can't believe that people would criticize you for that. Goodness, who are these people? The next time someone criticizes you for having a mastectomy make sure to let them know that you expect a full medical report if that person ever has a problem with his/her breasts, ovaries, or testicles -- because you want your say in how they should handle things. Don't let them bother you!

    Mimi
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    #5
    I think you listen to your
    I think you listen to your doctor and get his recommendation, then get a second opinion, if you want one and then do your research and make your decision. We are all different and you will not have ALL of the people you discuss this with agree with you. But, once you have made your decision and are comfortable with it, stick to it. Bottom line, it's your decision and your's alone and you have to be the one to make it. After all, you are going to be the one to live with it. Good luck!!!
  • ms_independent
    ms_independent Member Posts: 214
    #6
    trust yourself
    Just trust yourself. I think we all have doubts sometimes. But, I believe when we make an informed decision and in the moment it 'feels right' then it is most probably right. I can certainly understand wanting the mastectomy. I chose to have a double mastectomy partly because I didn't want to go through the angst-ridden waiting periods from discovery of a problem to the final result. Your decision needs to feel right to you---not anybody else.
    Hugs, El
  • m-star
    m-star Member Posts: 441
    #7
    ms_independent said:

    trust yourself
    Just trust yourself. I think we all have doubts sometimes. But, I believe when we make an informed decision and in the moment it 'feels right' then it is most probably right. I can certainly understand wanting the mastectomy. I chose to have a double mastectomy partly because I didn't want to go through the angst-ridden waiting periods from discovery of a problem to the final result. Your decision needs to feel right to you---not anybody else.
    Hugs, El

    i chose a prophylactic
    i chose a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy because i was high risk of BC.

    I've had cancer once-HL- and i'll do what ever it takes to prevent having to go through all that again......

    I know it's your choice as everyone says,but for what its worth,i think you've made the right decision in removing the infected breast. If it was me in your position,i would be having them BOTH removed. Just my opinion. If there's no breast tissue left,it DARN hard for it come back!

    =)

    PS. I am now 7 weeks post op and dont regret a thing.
  • slynch
    slynch Member Posts: 82
    #8
    m-star said:

    i chose a prophylactic
    i chose a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy because i was high risk of BC.

    I've had cancer once-HL- and i'll do what ever it takes to prevent having to go through all that again......

    I know it's your choice as everyone says,but for what its worth,i think you've made the right decision in removing the infected breast. If it was me in your position,i would be having them BOTH removed. Just my opinion. If there's no breast tissue left,it DARN hard for it come back!

    =)

    PS. I am now 7 weeks post op and dont regret a thing.

    Thanks
    I have decided to have both removed because my mom had ovarian cancer and the risk is higher for me that the other breast will give me problems so I am doing both. My husband and I both feel good about my decision. I guess we all wish we had a crystal ball.
  • Mama G
    Mama G Member Posts: 762
    #9
    slynch said:

    Thanks
    I have decided to have both removed because my mom had ovarian cancer and the risk is higher for me that the other breast will give me problems so I am doing both. My husband and I both feel good about my decision. I guess we all wish we had a crystal ball.

    I agree with you and did have a mastectomy
    even though my doctor said it only improved my chances by 3%. He said if I had been his wife he'd do a mastectomy so that she would NEVER have to worry about it coming back in that breast. Since then I've had a couple days of regret, but mostly I'm glad I made this decision. No one can even tell which breast is fake! The prosthesis is very comfortable.
    AND the news a few nights ago stated that a recent study had shown women who chose to have mastectomy seemed to have a longer rate of survival than those who chose lumpectomy.
    Who knows... But I'm fine with my decision!
  • katznc
    katznc Member Posts: 70
    #10
    Your breast is not who you are
    I went with the mast with no reconstruction. Your breast does not define who you are and oh yeah I can say that cause I'm 58 and not 30. At 30 I would have been devastated. But now I know better. I know that that boob is not who I was and without it is not who I am. I was horified at one biopsy and you had 3 so it just shows how strong you are when you said enough is enough. If you had a lump instead of a mast you would be worring about that breast developing a new tumor. I just found out I had a tumor behind the one they saw and they never saw it on a mammo ultra or felt it but was there. Be kind to yourself, rejoyce in the DCIS dx as it doesn't get better than that and dance with NED !!
  • ms.sunshine
    ms.sunshine Member Posts: 707 Member
    #11
    I too had to make a decision
    I too had to make a decision just yesterday, told my surgeon what I wanted done. I'm set for surgery on 4-16. I feel at peace about by choice. I also thought this is drastic, but all we have to go thru to kill and beat cancer is drastic.
    Before I seen my doctors I did alot of research. I also talked to women who had surgery. The ladies who informed me the most and helped me with my decision are right here on this board. I have never posted, but I have been here for months reading. Thank you ladies. When I seen my doctors I knew what I needed to do, but I let them tell me what they thought I should do, and it turned out to be the same decision that I made. That gave me a peace that I had made the right choice. Also when my surgeon was talking to me about the procedure I actually knew what he was talking about. Boy did I feel smart yesterday haha.
  • sparky72156
    sparky72156 Member Posts: 61
    #12
    My oncologist told me that
    My oncologist told me that "we don't normally recommend a bilateral mastectomy for DCIS in only one breast." I told him that he didn't see the looks in my kids' eyes when I told them I needed surgery; I was going to be as aggressive as I could be. Good thing, because that DCIS was just a part of what ended up being a 0.5cm tumor of invasive cells. After the surgery, he said to me, "I don't know what it was inside of you that told you to have the bilateral mastectomy, but it was the absolute right thing to do. Because of that, you don't need any follow up therapies at all (chemo, rads, or hormonal therapies)."
    Follow what your gut tells you to do. I will never regret my decision. I had immediate reconstruction and I am thrilled with the results. I found out later that my parents and siblings thought I was crazy for being so aggressive. They don't think that now.
    P.S. The doctors told me before the surgery that there was only a 5-10% chance that they would find anything other than DCIS. Surprise, surprise!
  • katznc
    katznc Member Posts: 70
    #13
    ms.sunshine said:

    I too had to make a decision
    I too had to make a decision just yesterday, told my surgeon what I wanted done. I'm set for surgery on 4-16. I feel at peace about by choice. I also thought this is drastic, but all we have to go thru to kill and beat cancer is drastic.
    Before I seen my doctors I did alot of research. I also talked to women who had surgery. The ladies who informed me the most and helped me with my decision are right here on this board. I have never posted, but I have been here for months reading. Thank you ladies. When I seen my doctors I knew what I needed to do, but I let them tell me what they thought I should do, and it turned out to be the same decision that I made. That gave me a peace that I had made the right choice. Also when my surgeon was talking to me about the procedure I actually knew what he was talking about. Boy did I feel smart yesterday haha.

    Ms. Sunshine
    Good luck with your surgery and as all the ladies say...you will be in our thoughts and prayers. Aren't they all just grand!
  • slynch
    slynch Member Posts: 82
    #14
    katznc said:

    Your breast is not who you are
    I went with the mast with no reconstruction. Your breast does not define who you are and oh yeah I can say that cause I'm 58 and not 30. At 30 I would have been devastated. But now I know better. I know that that boob is not who I was and without it is not who I am. I was horified at one biopsy and you had 3 so it just shows how strong you are when you said enough is enough. If you had a lump instead of a mast you would be worring about that breast developing a new tumor. I just found out I had a tumor behind the one they saw and they never saw it on a mammo ultra or felt it but was there. Be kind to yourself, rejoyce in the DCIS dx as it doesn't get better than that and dance with NED !!

    Am I missing something
    I keep seeing a reference to "NED" in a lot of posts. Please clue me in.
  • mariam_11_09
    mariam_11_09 Member Posts: 691 Member
    #15
    I also avoided talking to

    I also avoided talking to many people about my choice of treatment because I did not want to become confused. I hardly went to a western doctor, always went to an herbalist and have many friends who are horrified I now chose chemo.

    So yes, I chose conventional western treatment for cancer and decided I was going to commit to it no matter what ( I have ok'd certain herbs with my Onc to support my body). What I do tell people is that cancer is something very personal and it is a personal choice as to how to treat it. Each person is different and ultimately there is no right or wrong just the choice you have made.

    My treatment has involved a mastectomy - 50% of my breast was DCIS in addition to a lump. Initially I thought I could have breast preservation but the breast surgeon told me that wasn't really an option because I would be in and out having tests and biopsies and run the risk of the DCIS becoming invasive. As sad as I was to loose the breast, I am glad I had the mastectomy. I was offered a double (my other breast is just fine) but I chose to leave my other breast alone and glad I have.

    Whatever decision you make is the best decision for you. The grass is not always greener on the otherside.
  • ms_independent
    ms_independent Member Posts: 214
    #16
    slynch said:

    Am I missing something
    I keep seeing a reference to "NED" in a lot of posts. Please clue me in.

    NED
    No Evidence of Disease.

    I didn't know either until someone else asked.

    Hugs, El

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