To "William Marshall" a big thank you from me!!!!

lindadanis Member Posts: 235
edited March 2014 in Esophageal Cancer #1
Thanks Mr. Marshall for responding to my question about Eddie and the bike situation. I cannot thank you enough for taking the time to write to me about this. I totally agree with you on all accounts, my daughter and I do need a break and we are going to plan one very soon, just for a day or so and get out of here. I could not agree with you more that buying a bike for him would be a suicide mission, nevertheless to say it would be a huge dangerous situation for him to be on the road. I do not know where this came from, he seems so resentful towards me, it really started back when he was first diagnosed last october. I do not think he is talking himself, I believe it is the cancer and the chemo, but honestly William, Eddie has not dealt with this cancer at all. He was diagnosed on October 7, 2009 and on October 8th, the day after, he told me he wanted a recliner in his bedroom because this is where he would be spending alot of his time so I believe from that day on, he made up his mind that he would be in his bedroom, whether or not he was in pain from the cancer, which he says he is not, but believe me, he has spent most of his hours in his bed watching tv or napping. I believe he is depressed and cannot blame him but he will not up his paxill from 10 mgs., which his doctor has asked him to do on several occasions. I cannot seem to get him out of his room, he stays in there constantly except to go to the doctors, etc. Tomorrow is chemo day again and he will then get up and go, very very mad face, but go.
I believe that some people handle cancer differently, and I am so sad that these months, days are gone forever, and that we do nothing together as a family. My marriage for 24 years was, I thought, a good marriage, we have one child age 22, and we did alot together., so therefore, she is very sad and confused as to what is going on now. Not only is she losing her dad to this terrible cancer, but I am sure she cannot figure out why he is in his room so much and I just don't have the answers for her.

I am somewhat concerned as time goes on, how am I going to handle things around here., like when I need hospice or help to come in, he is so adamant about people in the house, he made me get rid of the visiting nurse in one day, what will I do when I do need these people?
I believe that Eddie is just so mad that he got this horrible cancer and that his life is going to be cut short, he cannot deal with it. How do I help him? He does see a social worker once a month, he will not go more often.

Thanks Mr. Marshall very much for your words of wisdom, I read your posts all the time.



  • MOE58
    MOE58 Member Posts: 589 Member
    I agree Linda he is an awesome man

    I am sorry you are going through this with your husband, William always has the right words to say of course you know he stays up late and barely sleeps to answer and check on all of us. I had some very difficult times during my process and one day I asked William for some help and he was there, I think we are so fortunate to have this man on our site, and answer so many of us, and he always has the right words. I have adopted him as my father since I don't have one anymore but he knows I have to always look up to him. I have went through alot of problems in the past year and he or his wife always has the right letter or answer for whatever I ask, I absolutely think GOD gave him to all of us on this site for a reason. He really had doubts about me in the beginning but as time has went on he told me i grew up and was wearing my big girl panties well, and now has approved me to help others that I can help on this site. I want you to know I read posts daily I may not answer them but know i pray for each and every one on this site

    I wish you the best and hope things get better for you and your daughter

    Lori aka MOE