Panic

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  • aztec45
    aztec45 Member Posts: 757
    #22
    chenheart said:

    For the record, I will be
    For the record, I will be celebrating 7 years out of treatment on the 29th of this month~ I have my every 6 month appointment with my oncologist on the 23, and I feel that niggly, panic feeling starting to fill my psyche. It is something I mentally try and fight, but it is still there, just the same. Everytime my Dr asks me how I am, I say "You tell ME, you have my lab results"...and then I start holding my breath waiting for whatever news he is going to give me.

    Point being, you are sooo very normal with your reactions! As long as they don't interfere with your quality of life, and only rear their heads when an appointment is on the horizon, I say you are right on track with the rest of us Warrior-Survivors!

    Hugs,
    Chen♥

    That is Awesome
    There is hope for us all. You go girl!!! Go on with your 7 year cancer free Warrior-Survivor self.

    P
  • susanleeann
    susanleeann Member Posts: 58
    #23
    Sharon_D said:

    Thanks Jacqui
    Actually my dr put me on "anti-depressants" when I was diagnosed last June. I couldn't talk about it for a while without crying.

    I'm sooooo much better now and I can fight the panic on my own most of the time. I just don't like anything that "controls" me and if I allow it, occasionally, the panic would take me over.

    I'm sure everything will be fine and I can't wait to get it all behind me.

    My husband and I retired on July 1, 2009 and my surgery was July 7th. After I got thru surgery and chemo and started to feel almost human, he had knee replacement. We can't wait to both get back upright and functional so we can LIVE again!!

    Lord willing, we are going to Florida in May.

    Oh, and I am not on hormone replacement. I'm on NOTHING. Isn't that awesome??

    anxiety and depression are
    anxiety and depression are two different things chemically in the brain. some meds are sufficient for both but from what i understand you usually need something for each.
  • susanleeann
    susanleeann Member Posts: 58
    #24
    TraciInLA said:

    Blubbering Bottle of Pepsi here
    Sharon,

    You and I are in about the same place on this journey -- I was diagnosed last May, surgery in June, finished chemo in October and rads at the end of December.

    And I, too, will have my first post-treatment mammogram next month. I knew I was terrified about it, but didn't realize how much until the reminder note to schedule the mammogram arrived in the mail from my surgeon's office yesterday. I opened it, and promptly burst into tears.

    So, while you're a shaken bottle of Pepsi, I'm currently a blubbering one! :-)

    I'm so sick of acquaintances, co-workers, neighbors, etc. asking me "So, you're cured now, right?" "So, you're in remission now, right?" The answer is I don't know, and (like Mimi said) none of us can ever really know -- a friend accused me of being selfish for saying this, but, if I have to live with that uncertainty for the rest of my life, then everyone else does, too. I'm just not going to tell people what they want to hear to make THEM feel better.

    (Okay, I guess right now I'm a Cranky Bottle of Pepsi! :-)

    Traci

    never heard the blubbering
    never heard the blubbering bottle of pepsi description before. i like it. it is a very good description of the feeling you have when you are not quite out of control.

    not sure about cranky pepsi though, might have to think about that one.
  • carkris
    carkris Member Posts: 4,553 Member
    #25
    MAJW said:

    Remission is what I have been told I am in.......by all 3 of my physicians......as others have said, I don't think they like to use the word "cured" when dealing with breast cancer.....other cancers I believe can be labeled cured......I too, am coming up on my first post mammo next month.......holding my breath but not to anxious, YET....because I had just had a mammo and ultrasound 3 months before I found my cancer myself this time last year......can't believe it's already been a year since my life changed for ever in the blink of an eye......but I have moved on.....best I can.....I am back to all my regular activities, etc......I refuse to live with the "what ifs"....If it comes back, it comes back, I'll have to deal with it yet again......I pray to God that it doesn't but once again, I have zero control over it same as the first go round....I've made a conscious decision to try and not worry about things of which I have no control......I can only control my own reactions.......not my body if it decides to return cancer to me.......It's been such a long journey as it is for all of us but I am trying to live my life to the fullest.......
    Best Wishes to all

    Ihad BC 6 years ago and have
    Ihad BC 16 years ago and have never been told I'm cured. I was going to say what mimi said and others. Any test brings up intense anxiety, and you deal with it any way you can. It is your body recalling a traumatic event and telling you"danger" even if there isnt any. I take an ativan if I need to. I use distraction and try to be busy. hard to do while in treatment though. I had a sad day yesterday, slightly anxious, but wasnt feeling particularly well. I find being tired and having a little bug can exacerbate the feelings. So get rest while you can, and take care of yourself. (I am on my second BC a new primary)
  • Ritzy
    Ritzy Member Posts: 4,381 Member
    #26
    Sharon_D said:

    Thanks Jacqui
    Actually my dr put me on "anti-depressants" when I was diagnosed last June. I couldn't talk about it for a while without crying.

    I'm sooooo much better now and I can fight the panic on my own most of the time. I just don't like anything that "controls" me and if I allow it, occasionally, the panic would take me over.

    I'm sure everything will be fine and I can't wait to get it all behind me.

    My husband and I retired on July 1, 2009 and my surgery was July 7th. After I got thru surgery and chemo and started to feel almost human, he had knee replacement. We can't wait to both get back upright and functional so we can LIVE again!!

    Lord willing, we are going to Florida in May.

    Oh, and I am not on hormone replacement. I'm on NOTHING. Isn't that awesome??

    Want to send you cyber hugs
    Want to send you cyber hugs and prayers that your mammo will be clean. I think the "panic" is inside all of us, especially when we have tests coming up. Try to know that you are fighting the beast still and that you will be just fine! We are here to support and help you always.

    Sue :)

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