Home Sweet home, NOT...con't

dorion
dorion Member Posts: 183
edited March 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1
Hi Ladies
Well I thought I'd better start a new thread, the other is looking a bit full. Thank you Nancy and Leeza for chimming in on this. Leeza, no matter what hell I"m going through, all of us for that matter, I and I'm sure I speak for the rest of us will always care of how the other is doing no matter what. So naturally my Sweetness I care a great deal of what's goin on with you.
Sounds pretty good so far with you, which is awesome. So you haven't started chemo yet eh? Well please make sure you let us know what they decided and what kind of drugs you are going to be on, that way we can give you heads up as to what to expect based on our experiences with the various drugs out there. Yes we do get House here in Toronto, I very rarely watch it because it's not on consistantly and I usually catch it quite by accident (channel surfing).

Well I spoke to the the guy tonight and he tells me that based on comparing the two ct images from the last time I was here til now it shows that the obstruction has gotten worse. But the good news is, is that it's a small bowel obstruction, so hopefully with the proper drugs and me listening to thier instructions like not eating like I did today, I snuck off and had a tea biscuite which I'm paying for now. Hopefully the radiologist that specializes in draining under imaging will be back on Monday and they will attempt to drain whatever fluid is in my gut. Not sure if I mentioned this earlier, but now my darn legs are so swollen, from top to bottom and I'm having pains in my right side where the nafrostomy (spelling) site is, sure hope that isn't another problem. But back to the main topic here. So then after the draining, starting Monday they are going to put me on a clinical trial study using taxol and I'm not sure what other drug is involved but definately not carbo platinum and make sure that I don't have any adverse reactions to this regime. If that goes well then I think I'll be able to go home next week, maybe say Wednesday where I have a life time of housework and laundry waiting for me...lol....even if I'm not there it seems to find a way to get messy.
So it will take 3 months as you guys know before they can do another ct scan to find out if this thing is working. I'm actually relieved by that, not sure if this makes sense, I'm releived by the 3 month wait because it will give me a brake from immediate worries. Like today, I was having all these anxiety attacts waiting for the results. When it's short term it becomes more nerve wracking, if you know what I mean.

Doctor Joy joy also felt it nessarry to tell me that he feel obligated even though he knows that I don't want to know too much in depth details about prognosis, but he feels that it will be nessary to tell me when to get my affairs in order. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr that drives me nuts, like all of us don't have a clue eh? Anyway Ladies that's about it. I am so sorry that these postings are so long and tiring for you to read. It's hard for me to keep it short sometimes, especially when I have a bit of a walk to get here on the puter, so I want to make it worth my walk. OK OK, I"m going now. I love all of you and my prayers are with each and every one of you lovely Ladies. Look forward to hearing from you soon.

Linda

Comments

  • msfanciful
    msfanciful Member Posts: 559
    #2
    Hi Linda,
    I hate to hear
    Hi Linda,

    I hate to hear that things are dragging you along like this, but at least now you know what is going on at this point.

    I know exactly what you mean about not having to worry about immediate issues, it's a time that I always used to focus on other things, especially things I usually neglected as a result of worrying about the cancer issues. LOL!

    I am praying that you can get home soon; just to at least get back some sense of a normal routine!

    Praying for your daughter too.

    Love you,

    Sharon
  • Mwee
    Mwee Member Posts: 1,338
    #3
    Monday
    Linda... I'm so glad to hear that they seem to have a handle on what's causing your distention, but I so wish that you didn't have to wait until Monday! The clinical trial with taxol and the "mystery ingredient" sounds very interesting. Please don't fret over long postings, I was thrilled to be able to read your post this AM and hear what is going on with you.
    (((HUGS))) Maria
  • lindaprocopio
    lindaprocopio Member Posts: 1,980 Member
    #4
    Mwee said:

    Monday
    Linda... I'm so glad to hear that they seem to have a handle on what's causing your distention, but I so wish that you didn't have to wait until Monday! The clinical trial with taxol and the "mystery ingredient" sounds very interesting. Please don't fret over long postings, I was thrilled to be able to read your post this AM and hear what is going on with you.
    (((HUGS))) Maria

    I LOVE the 'ignorant bliss' of not knowing between scans!
    I really relax into the 'not knowing' between scans, a surprise to me since I have often been accused of being 'too controlling', so I know what you mean about the relief of having 3 months between scans. Your active imagination needs that break, that restful time of being happy again. I feel sorry for the women that continue to worry and suffer with the 'what ifs' during these small reprieves. You put it in God's hands when it's something this HUGE and let Him deal with it and you put it out of your mind!

    And I could just slap your doctor about the 'getting your affairs in order' conversation! I pushed my oncologist for a prognosis when I first got my recurrence, telling him that I had a lot of contractural obligations and employees that depended on me and that I had a lot of things I needed to button up if my time was short. When he responded that I should begin to 'get my affairs in order' I still remember how horrible that felt. I asked for it, and yet I guess I was hoping for some reassurance that I had PLENTY of time. (the old "Be-careful-what-you-ask-for, because-you-just-might-get-it!" HA!) ((((HUGS)))). I'm a planner by nature, and I have been actively getting my affairs in order. But I keep it an abstract exercise, a move towards eventual "early retirement". You know the country song: "Call me Cleopatra, because I'm the Queen of De-Nile" ? That's me! I'm GOOD at it and honestly happy most of the time. I can see you doing that when you get home: making plans and provisions "just in case", but not falling into dispair as you go about buttoning things up, because in your heart you know you just may FOOL THEM ALL and LIVE, on and on.
  • dorion
    dorion Member Posts: 183
    #5
    lindaprocopio said:

    I LOVE the 'ignorant bliss' of not knowing between scans!
    I really relax into the 'not knowing' between scans, a surprise to me since I have often been accused of being 'too controlling', so I know what you mean about the relief of having 3 months between scans. Your active imagination needs that break, that restful time of being happy again. I feel sorry for the women that continue to worry and suffer with the 'what ifs' during these small reprieves. You put it in God's hands when it's something this HUGE and let Him deal with it and you put it out of your mind!

    And I could just slap your doctor about the 'getting your affairs in order' conversation! I pushed my oncologist for a prognosis when I first got my recurrence, telling him that I had a lot of contractural obligations and employees that depended on me and that I had a lot of things I needed to button up if my time was short. When he responded that I should begin to 'get my affairs in order' I still remember how horrible that felt. I asked for it, and yet I guess I was hoping for some reassurance that I had PLENTY of time. (the old "Be-careful-what-you-ask-for, because-you-just-might-get-it!" HA!) ((((HUGS)))). I'm a planner by nature, and I have been actively getting my affairs in order. But I keep it an abstract exercise, a move towards eventual "early retirement". You know the country song: "Call me Cleopatra, because I'm the Queen of De-Nile" ? That's me! I'm GOOD at it and honestly happy most of the time. I can see you doing that when you get home: making plans and provisions "just in case", but not falling into dispair as you go about buttoning things up, because in your heart you know you just may FOOL THEM ALL and LIVE, on and on.

    Hello Ladies
    Hi my Darlings
    Yes I know that feeling of asking for the prognosis and when I got it, I was so darn scared of out my wits I thought to myself "what an idiot!" I asked for it and got it. But it took me a week to get it right out of my head again. As Maria said I leave it completely in God's hands. Only He knows our times not man.

    I don't know what they pump into the air here in the hospitals but it sure makes one sleepy as heck. Right now my new worry is my legs, mainly the left one, it almost looks like elephantitis, it's huge. Just give me a break for once is all I asked, right? That's what allof ask for. Well nothing else new report since this mornings posting and now I'm must put my feet up and take a nap before I fall asleep here in this community computer room. Love to you (all of you guys). Yup, got to go, having tokeep backspacing......

    Linda

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