Newly diagnosed - have some questions

NellieB853
NellieB853 Member Posts: 7
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hi, I was diagnosed with a biopsy 2 weeks ago. The tumor is 2.4 cm, grade 3, ER+ PR+ and Her 2 negative. I have met with my surgeon and decided to have a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. There have been many family members with breast cancer so genetic testing will be happening. I don't know for sure yet but I was told that I will likely need chemo even if my nodes are negative - I think due to the grade of the tumor. I will be meeting with the plastic surgeon tomorrow to go over the reconstruction options. Right now I feel rather numb and disconnected - maybe I would feel better if I could cry but can't seem to do that. Did any of you react like that? I feel I should be crying or upset but I just feel dazed. Have any of you had bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction?
I was wondering how much pain there is and how much help you needed. Also was wondering how long you needed to be out of work after surgery and if anyone has been able to continue working while they had chemo? I am 59 years old, married, have two children and four grandchildren. I guess that's all for now - I'm not sure what to write. Any info at all would be great.

Comments

  • helen e
    helen e Member Posts: 223
    #2
    Nellie
    I think I was numb only I called it rocked. My whole world was rocked on its foundaion. I was told only lumpectomy, which I had in October. Then came the call to tell me I needed a mastectomy - because of this no rads. I had mast. with immediate tram flap recon. 12/11. I have been home since. Healing great, just a few minor complications. I did a lot of research and of course the people on here have been a great resource. I'm sorry that you've joined "the club that nobody wants to belong to."
  • Dawne.Hope
    Dawne.Hope Member Posts: 823
    #3
    Hi Nellie
    I was diagnosed in August and have only cried once since then concerning the bc. I think the primary emotion for me was fear and anxiousness.

    I've read about many women where the emotions catch up with you months, even a year later. What you're going through is normal.

    I don't have any advice about the masectomy and reconstruction because my surgery is still about four weeks away.

    Know that whenever you need to rejoice, cry, lament, get angry, we're here for you. Lots of great advice on here and warm, loving hearts.

    Hang in there. Truly, we can only take it one day at a time, sometimes one minute at a time.

    Peace to you,
    dh
  • kms3566
    kms3566 Member Posts: 57
    #4
    Hi, I am newly diagnosed and
    Hi, I am newly diagnosed and having a bilateral mastectomy also, actually on Friday. I was told reconstruction would not be for about a year. I wish that were not the case. I have been through many emotions, mostly I just feel like I am going through motions without really feeling it is real yet.

    Good luck to you. This site has been helping me to keep a positive outlook, we can get thru this!
  • misann
    misann Member Posts: 13
    #5
    kms3566 said:

    Hi, I am newly diagnosed and
    Hi, I am newly diagnosed and having a bilateral mastectomy also, actually on Friday. I was told reconstruction would not be for about a year. I wish that were not the case. I have been through many emotions, mostly I just feel like I am going through motions without really feeling it is real yet.

    Good luck to you. This site has been helping me to keep a positive outlook, we can get thru this!

    Yes you can both get through
    Yes you can both get through this, answering to kms3566 as well. My reaction was to cry cry cry but that's what I do when I get really angry and can't take my frustrations out any other way so that was just me. Trust in God that you are on this path for a reason and He will lead you through it. You have many wonderful women and men praying for you.
    God Bless,
    Missy
  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    #6
    misann said:

    Yes you can both get through
    Yes you can both get through this, answering to kms3566 as well. My reaction was to cry cry cry but that's what I do when I get really angry and can't take my frustrations out any other way so that was just me. Trust in God that you are on this path for a reason and He will lead you through it. You have many wonderful women and men praying for you.
    God Bless,
    Missy

    I just want to welcome both
    I just want to welcome both of you to the site! You will find lots of support here and lots of encouragement. I had a lumpectomy, so, I can't answer your questions about chemo or a mastectomy. Just want to wish both of you good luck!

    Megan
  • jbug
    jbug Member Posts: 285
    #7
    Megan M said:

    I just want to welcome both
    I just want to welcome both of you to the site! You will find lots of support here and lots of encouragement. I had a lumpectomy, so, I can't answer your questions about chemo or a mastectomy. Just want to wish both of you good luck!

    Megan

    Welcome to both of you
    My story is different, lumpectomy and rads...but wanted to welcome you! There are many women who can help you w/all your questions/concerns.

    Blessings....
    Julie
  • pinkkari09
    pinkkari09 Member Posts: 877
    #8
    welcome to the site you
    welcome to the site you never wanted to join but will be so glad it's here. I just wanted to say it's ok to be numb, it's ok to cry, it's ok to feel any way you wish...we all deal with this in our own way, I cried at first then I was numb and now I cry again...big hugs to you and keep us posted on your progress
    ~Kari
  • Different Ballgame
    Different Ballgame Member Posts: 868
    #9
    NEVER CRIED NEVER FELT NUMB - JUST SHOCKED
    At 65 I was shocked when I was told that I had cancer. Diagnose 0 Stage DCIS. Calcification - no tumor. Oncologist surgeon made a statement to me on my first visit and noted that I did not cry. He stated that most women cry when told that they have breast cancer. I never did cry. I can't explain why. After 2 surgical biopsies which yield margins that were not clear, I opted for a bilateral mastectomy because I could not bear the thought of another surgical biopsy that would continue to yield margins that were not clear. When I was told the results of the mastectomy - no more cancer was present in the breast - I then felt saddness that I opted for the mastectomy and then told myself not to look backward but to look forward.

    Almost a year later I attended a luncheon for breast cancer patients. I was curious so I asked the women at our table if they cried when they were informed of their cancer. Only one woman stated that she did not cry while all the others stated that they did cry.

    My reconstruction is successful. I have silicone implants and love them. Because of my weight, I was not candidate for other reconstruction options. I will say that there something to be said for looking down at your body and seeing breasts come forward. Thank heaven for implants. Oops, I meant to say, "Thank heaven for those plastic surgeons who give us those implants." Make sure you like your plastic surgeon. If you don't, find another.

    Any questions you have, write them down and bring your list. Doctors love it when you come in with a list of written questions.

    I do believe I was home for 3 weeks - healing. I was stubborn and returned to work three weeks after my surgery. I thought I was superwoman. For me, when looking back I should have stayed home one more week. I am an administrative assistant and work for real estate brokers.

    As far as pain, I never felt the pain of having a mastectomy. I did, however, take those pain killers faithfully (because I did not want to experience pain) and they worked beautifully.

    Having 0 Stage DCIS with no cancer present in the breast or sentinel lymph nodes after the mastectomy made it possible for me not to have chemo, radiation, or hormone therapy.

    LOTS OF HUGS AND LOTS OF LOVE,
    JANELLE
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
    #10
    Working on chemo
    I had breast cancer in 1987 (large tumor, 4 nodes, ER+) and had a single mastectomy, chemo (CMF), tamoxifen and radiation. I was out a couple of weeks after the surgery but worked the entire time that I was on chemo (other chemo regimens are tougher than CMF). I took something for nausea while I was doing my 2 weeks on of chemo. I did fine at work--although a little tired and queasy. I had my other breast removed in about 1993 after 2 of my 3 sisters had breast cancer. Last year, I discovered that I had a bone metastasis in my ribs, but I am still working and doing well. I am a nurse practitioner so I can arrange my schedule around appt's, treatments, etc. Working is my saving grace as it keeps me focused off of my problems.
  • padee6339
    padee6339 Member Posts: 763
    #11
    Hi Nellie
    Welcome to the site and remember, first and foremost, just breathe. You are starting a journey no one wants to take, but you will be strong and come through it. I had a lumpectomy, chemo and rads, but no mastectomy. There are many wonderful women here who can help you through that, all I can offer are my thoughts and prayers.
    Hugs - Pat

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