T III Stage 2 rectal cancer Should I postpone treatment?

The way I see it...
No need to put it off. My take is the sooner you can get it done and out of the way, the sooner you can get on with your life and put the beast behind you(unintended pun.) I'm 40yo. relatively newlywed and I've got plenty of life left. I don't want to spend it wondering what's going on with the cancer. I can deal with 6mo. of feeling like crap. As far as the sex, it's not s mstter of function as it is libido. Everything functions just fine, just that while going through chemo, sex is one of the lsst things on your mind, at least for me. My wife has been very understanding in that regard. It's just gonna make for one hell of a long weekend in April/May when I'm finished!

-DJ

When I hit about 48, my body
When I hit about 48, my body started giving out. Mostly my knees- I was waiting until the school year ended to get cartilage damage taken care of (cause truly I was into planning my life) when I was diagnosed with colon cancer. I did have a colostomy, that has since been reversed. I didn't have to have radiation, so your potential issues were not mine. But my body continues to fail me. My knees are shot- I need both replaced. At Thanksgiving I had my left thumb joint replaced and a compressed nerve at the elbow released. The recovery on that has been less than pleasant. I would say that physically, my quality of life sucks. I am a mere shadow of what I was able to do pre aging vs now. The difference of course is none of this is permanent, I hope to have back the quality of life I once enjoyed before my body started to age. But I also know that I am only going to get older and probably what feels good today will hurt tomorrow. There is a level of acceptance for me that means I have to let go of what once was in order to live in the present and be there for those I love in the future.

My first grandchild was born 4 days before I was diagnosed with stage 3B colon cancer. I do believe that God planned that perfectly! This gift from God became entwined in my life and totally confused the heck out of me- geez here I thought I was suppose to be sad and angry- and all I could do was wait to hold him, smell him, snuggle his warmth and delight in the squeals of life he gave. And I prayed as I held him- for time, for time. So that he would know me and would have wonderful memories of the grandmother who adored him.

Your issues are different- you are wanting time before potentially life altering radiation and surgery. Is it worth the risk you want to take? None of us can answer for you, but for me, no way would I have taken the risk. Life today is not how it will be tomorrow- body's give out on us and grandchildren are born. For me to have made the decision you are thinking about making? Would have been not about quality of life issues, but about choosing to live in the uncertainity of the present over embracing the joy of the future.

geotina said:

You dodged a bullet
Finding it at Stage II, you dodged the bullet, Stage IV. With this disease, things can turn on a dime. Take the treatment. This is not just your problm, it is a disease the whole family faces. Look at your wife, look at your kids, look in the mirror and then ask yourself if you really want to take the chance of being six feet below ground or do the treatment and stay six feet above ground. Your life has alredy changed with your diagnosis, there is no going back, but go forward and just do what you probably already know you have to do. Best of luck in whatever road you chose to take. Tina

You are blessed
I was diagnosed with a cancerous mass in my ceacum and after the lab report came back I had to decided if I really wanted to do the 12 treaments of Folfox. I didn't feel that I needed to since only 2 out of 37 came back and I know God to be a healer (He has always miraculous healed me of things before) but this time I knew that the healing would come through the hands of a doctor. I believed deep inside that all other cells had dried up and I am cancer free. Then people that care about me (my husband, Godmother, older women who had gone through it and never shared thier experience and doctor friends) shared with me the benifits of going through 6 months of therapy altering my life of travel, book promotions, singing and speaking. I decided to take thier advise and finding out that each round of treatement takes me through about 4-5 days of fatigue and when the treatment is over for that next week, it feels as if I never had a treatment. So I think about my life after the 6 months where my life will be so sweet. So I say to you that unless God tells you that He is going to heal your body miraculous and to wait on that healing, go ahead and submit to the course of treatment to get that evil invader out of your body and trust HIM to bring you through it with a good result with no long term negative side effects. That's my point of view through exprience...

oh and I didn't want to put my family through this either. My daughters were just starting thier own lives in another state and I didn't want them worrying. When they saw that I was doing fine and I told them that I was going to be fine, they were o.k, stronger than what I thought...they came home for Christmas and watched me go through the first 2 treatments and when they left they had peace and are doing so well knowing that in June I will be traveling again, never to have to deal this that little c- cancer ever again!!!! And neither will they because they will get preventative checks earlier...hope this all helps

Neoadjuvant chemoradiotherapy
My husband finished his five weeks of chemoradiotherapy for a stage 2 rectal cancer on Dec 21.
During his treatment the only side effect worth considering was that he felt a little tired and he took a nap in the afternoon.
As for the issues of sexual disfunction I can assure you that things have been running smoothly since his treatment ended. As for the issue of incontinence he hasn't experienced anything other than visit the restroom a little more often after he's had something to drink.
My partner will not have to live with a colostomy since his cancer is at 10 cm from the dentate line. But a man who comes to do odd jobs around the house has been living with a permanent colostomy for 10 years and he says that his life is great and he's enjoying every minute of it. The neoadjuvant treatment will downstage your cancer and who knows they might be able to spare you the colostomy. In a stage 2 rectal cancer a cure is possible if you are willing to do what needs to be done. Ask your wife to read the opinions expressed on this board and I'm sure she'll convince you.
Hope you take the right decision. Take care and don't forget life is precious.

Annabelle41415 said:

Sorry
So sorry that you have cancer, but why would you not seek treatment now. And the reasons you mention for not seeking treatment now are not very valid. Sorry if this seems harsh, but you can't have sex if you are dead so why not get treated now. Having cancer removed from your body would make you healthier anyway. Just not sure of your reasoning and it sounds like you aren't looking at your future and your children but only short term. You should really reconsider. You haven't responded to any posts that were written to your response. Hopefully you will reconsider for your children's sake.

Kim

Pondering Again.......Mebored Dejavus perhaps ?
You made this statement....and I quote ", Death is not an issue for me here."

One question , is it not an issue to your 2 great kids and your great wife ?

Do the post op treatment, try living a little....sorry, I have just had a bad day and its not gettin' much better......

Buzzard

tootsie1 said:

Don't delay
I just can't imagine why you would want to postpone treatment or maybe never get it. You have a chance at a cure and more life with the ones you love, who also love you. Yes, there will be physical and emotional changes. But you know what? You'll be ALIVE. Please reconsider your decision.

*hugs*
Gail

LETS SEE......have treatment
LETS SEE......have treatment now and maybe be cured to see your children grow up and marry
or...... delay treatment until you are terminal and your kids grow up without you???????
mmmmmm tuff decision!!!!!!!!!

I am stage IV,I put off seeing a doctor because I thought it was my ulcerative colitis acting up.I waited till i was quite ill.I have had 2 major surgeries and lots of chemo going on 4 yrs now.
had i gone to a doctor just a year before,i probably would not have an ileostomy( which by the way is NOT the end of life quality,it can be managed fairly well)
cancer has not just happened to you ,it has happened to your family as well.
altho you do get the really crappy part

Quality of Life
SURE life sux with cancer and yes it took a while to grow but, it could start to grow faster and it could spread, and then you maynot have choices, I am stage 4 and so alot of others here at this point we have limited choices, you don't.
If you like to maintain normal functions, interview several Doc before surgery, a few more opinions may make your chances of keeping normal BMs possible,
I am due for surgery the 25th and hopefully i will Beable to have normal BMs, but who know since i waited to long.

Theres no quailty of life if you let this go and your Bowels rupture like mine did and so many others here, that can kill you and you will be in a lot of pain and in the hospital wish you had not waited.

The only thing time will buy you is more cancer,

So don't wait, Talk to your wife, make love to your wife and then get on with your treatment,

Your kids, trust me will only be kids and thye will love you as much if not even more as this all unfolds,

Thats what i have to say
Live, Laugh, Play, thats playschools moto and mine
Penny

Should I postpone treatment ? In a one word answer NOWAY
I believe that your family could deal with what you refer to as "PROBLEMS" a fair site better than losing you. You seem to look at the slow growin of tumors as a perk to a few years of "normal". You don't wanna go there. Do what ya can to rid yourself of the cancer cells in your body. I'm 3.5 years out of surgery and treatment "lucky enough to have had a tumor right in the right place to save workin parts" and with a few sideeffects am doin fine. Granted I am female and there are things that worry and affect you that don't affect me, but as a female, wife and mother, if you were my significant other I would want you around to be by my side and be there for your kids. Diagnosed before Thanksgivin, ya gotta get movin. Only my opinion.. Good Luck..