Okay
Yes I am still doing the colonoscopy next month. But now I have been scheduled for a sonogram of my left breast. Last month, my check up went very well except for the labs showing my anemia again. Today I went to the surgeon who will be doing the colonscopy..he also did the breast surgery...and he found a lump in the left breast and also some lymph nodes enlarged in my armpit. To say I am feeling completely blindsided doesn't come close. I just have no words for how I feel now. I am sure if there is something there we will take care of it. And I am thankful that my doctors are catching things. But I wonder when it will stop. I try to stay positive and focus on the rest of my life. But all of these "bumps in the road" make it hard to keep putting one foot in front of the other each day.
I know I need to focus all my attention on this and getting ready to battle if need be. But I just started a part time job. And I am in the last weeks of my unemployment. I worry that if I need treatment for anything and have to tell my boss, there goes the job if I have to take off. And then if unemployment finds out that I have a medical problem, well...Because I have no family left, and no really, really close friends, I worry about what will happen to me. Yes I have friends, but with all that has happened to me, a lot of the closeness has gone by the wayside.
I guess I really don't have a question, just thought I would update everyone about things and maybe ask for a prayer. Thanks to all of you. Cindy
Comments
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Sort of like hurricane season....
Sadly, these things can come in clusters....the GOOD news is, they caught it...just think about the millions walking around with a lump that don't think about the possibility of the beast....
Speaking from experience (I got the 2-fer...rectal cancer followed by breast cancer)...it IS beatable..and I contented myself with "Well, with the second set of chemo, we REALLY made sure the first cancer was a GONER!!!!"
Please keep us posted, dearheart...
Hugs, Kathi0 -
Oh Cindy, you have a lot on
Oh Cindy, you have a lot on your plate but you can get past it if you just take one bite at a time It's tough to keep putting one foot in front of the other but us women, we do it!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and keep on keeping on girl, we are here for you 24/7/365. Tons of Love,
Kari0 -
Hey Cindy
I'm single and
Hey Cindy
I'm single and live alone too. I've had to rely on friends and family some too, and it's difficult for me to ask for anything so I know how you feel! But trust that some of those friends want to help. They just need to know what you need from them. A ride somewhere? Company? help cleaning? I hope things work out for you. Let us know.
Dee0 -
Cindy
I am so sorry that you are going through this. I agree with what someone else said. Your friends don't know how to respond. I am sure if you let them know what you need that they will certainlly be there for you. Don't be surprised if some of them are scared completely away. They just don't know how to handle it.
I am sending positive vibes and lots of cyber hugs your way.
Jadie<30 -
Cindy my prayers and
Cindy my prayers and thoughts are with you. Right now all you can do is take it a day at a time, an hour at a time, or even a minute at a time. You have way too much on your plate. Take all of this in very small doses. It will all fall in to place and no matter how much you worry, the worry will not change anything. I know its easy to say, but I do try to practice the no worry concept most of the time. Please keep your chin up and keep us updated. Hugs and Prayers0 -
Sending you prayers Cindy!natly15 said:Cindy my prayers and
Cindy my prayers and thoughts are with you. Right now all you can do is take it a day at a time, an hour at a time, or even a minute at a time. You have way too much on your plate. Take all of this in very small doses. It will all fall in to place and no matter how much you worry, the worry will not change anything. I know its easy to say, but I do try to practice the no worry concept most of the time. Please keep your chin up and keep us updated. Hugs and Prayers
Sending you prayers Cindy!0 -
I am sending you lots ofdyaneb123 said:Hey Cindy
I'm single and
Hey Cindy
I'm single and live alone too. I've had to rely on friends and family some too, and it's difficult for me to ask for anything so I know how you feel! But trust that some of those friends want to help. They just need to know what you need from them. A ride somewhere? Company? help cleaning? I hope things work out for you. Let us know.
Dee
I am sending you lots of prayers and hugs Cindy! Please keep us updated!
♠♣ Susie ♠♣0 -
Hey Cindy, please know thatlaurissa said:Hi, Cindy
I wish you well. Take care.
Hey Cindy, please know that my thoughts and prayers are headed your way, and hopefully you can feel them right now. Sometimes I feel as though I impose so much on my friends and family, and then I am reminded that they are just laying in wait for me to give them direction. My husband is my constant companion, and I catch him sometimes just looking at me...he says it is because I am so beautiful, but I know he is just watching my every move so that he can react before I have to ask. A lot of times people just don't know what is needed without you asking, so when someone says to you, do you need anything, tell them. It really goes a long way in making them feel like they are helping you get through this, and it gives you a boost to know that they care. It is a two way street. I am so independent, that for a really long time when someone would ask "How are you doing", my patent answer was "Fine". I did this with a girlfriend who lives in another state, and when she finally came to see me for herself, she literally walked in the door, and turned around and walked out without saying a word. Later she told me that I was never to lie to her again. When I told her I was fine, she took me literally. However, seeing me face to face, she said I looked like the life had been drained completely out of me. It was a shock for her to walk into this without expecting to see me any other way but WELL. Share with your friends and family when they ask, be truthful, and ask for help when you need it. It gives everyone a sense that they are part of your recovery, and gives you peace of mind to know that there are those that care. I so hope this latest bump is not going to be anything more than that....a bump! Keep us informed, and know that there are lots of us out here who will lend our thougths, prayers, and pushes for a speedy recovery, no matter which is needed. Hugs. Judy0
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