Results, the future, and hope

My husbands scans looked good. He continues to respond well to the treatment. Over all he has had a 30& reduction in cancer since beginning treatment on Sept. 1, 2009. We had an excellent appointment with the onc. today. I was feeling very disturbed by our last talk with him- the "I don't think I can cure this cancer" talk. Well, my husband begins the conversation by telling the Doc that we had been thinking a lot about our last appointment and our onc. immediately said he was very upset by that conversation. he showed a side that I was so touched to see. He said he did not want to take away any of our hope and he felt like he did that to us every time. I told him that, to be fair, I asked many of the same questions, worded in different ways, looking for an answer I wanted to hear. I asked him what else we should be doing, what he would be doing if it were his wife- treatments in Germany? Other procedures not yet approved in the states? He said no, and I know that is what he believes. ANd from what I see here, I think the FOLFOX + avastin is the most aggressive thing we can be doing for ROger right now. That said, we were able to have a conversation about the next step. Our doc was careful to say that Roger might not get to a point where he is a surgical candidate. But in six months the medical team will get together and evaluate where he is at. He will have to have the primary rectal tumor removed, a liver resection, and surgery
on the peritoneal lining. It sounds like staging those surgeries will be extremely difficult. I imagine ROger and I will have many tough decisions ahead.

SO, back to one day at a time. It is easier to do one day at a time when I have a general idea of where we need/hope to be headed.
Roger's platelets were back up so he had the full treatment today. By the way, the magnesium and calcium drip they give him at the beginning and end of his treatments with oxaliplatin help him so much with the neuroathy.
His CEA is only 1.6! It was 20 when he started chemo, which I know is low anyway, but I am so excited that it has gone down with every treatment. (Our onc doesn't pay much attention to those, but I love watching those numbers!)
ANd last night I played armchair radiologist- I know, yikes!- and I could actually see that the tumors had shrunk from the last scan in October. It was very nice to be right! I admitted that I had done that and the Doc. gave me one of those grins- the kind your kid's pediatrician gives you when you say, "I was looking on the internet and am worried my kid has..."
The news today was good. Even though it really made even more clear what an incredible beast this is to fight- and the prospect of so many life threatening surgeries is daunting, I feel more hope than ever.
Thank you all for being here and sharing the journey.
Kim