husband very very depressed???

My husband, age 55, was diagnosed with stage four in October. Right from the start, he immediately went into severe depression. We consulted three doctors, all who said it was incurable, all said to do chemo, all had different opinions of what chemo, and right now we are at the end of his second chemo session, cisplastin and camptosar. He did ok the first time, this second round he has had constant diahrea and they put him on med's for this but still has it today, better but still has it. The oncologist put him on paxill before the chemo started about a month ago, nothing really happened with his depression, then they want to add ritalin and now marijuanna in a capsule form. I am very very concerned about all his head medicine being added on. We tried the marijuanna and he said he did not like the feeling he had, he has been on paxill for 6 weeks, no change, we have no started the ritalin yet. His doctor feels he has "failure to thrive"., and that his depression is getting in the way of his treatment. I feel so bad for my husband, I cannot seem to get through to him, we have been searching for a therpist but cannot find one who accepts our insurance. I am at wits end. He stays in bed 20 hours a day, just cannot seem to get himself together to come down and join me and our daughter. I know he is so depressed about his prognosis, they all said without chemo he would last under six months, with chemo, maybe 8-12 months. I think he just cannot grip that he is dying and he has lost about 60 pounds in four months. he barely eats nothing and drinks very little. We are up the chemo center twice a week for iv fluids. We took a break from chemo for xmas week but are to start his third session in two weeks. he saw his dad die from cancer 25 years ago and really never wanted to do chemo but I think felt he had no choice. Any suggestions about all this and about all this head med's. thanks so much for helping.