Did you deal with this too?

elizarose
elizarose Member Posts: 124
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
We all know breast cancer changes us forever. During this journey in addition to dealing with the emotions brought on by a cancer diagnosis, I have also had to deal with a lot of other emotional baggage. My cancer diagnosis has seemed to become some sort of catalyst. It has forced me to deal with all the hurts and hangups from the past. Anyone else have this experience?

Beth

Comments

  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    #2
    Beth, it's a good thing that
    Beth, it's a good thing that you are clearing up those hurts and hangups from the past. They also make us ill. Occasionally something will pop up for me and I vent here on the discussion boards or with a close friend. Getting rid of that stuff aids in overall healing. I dealt with most of those past hurts thru my life, and have mostly come to a point of forgiveness, love, and trusting God. It doesnt always work, but I try. I commend you for facing and working thru them.
  • tgf
    tgf Member Posts: 950 Member
    #3
    natly15 said:

    Beth, it's a good thing that
    Beth, it's a good thing that you are clearing up those hurts and hangups from the past. They also make us ill. Occasionally something will pop up for me and I vent here on the discussion boards or with a close friend. Getting rid of that stuff aids in overall healing. I dealt with most of those past hurts thru my life, and have mostly come to a point of forgiveness, love, and trusting God. It doesnt always work, but I try. I commend you for facing and working thru them.

    Emotions
    Beth ... I think we've all been placed in a situation where we've needed to sort of re-evaluate our priorties and values. For me ... this has been the one "good" thing to come from my cancer diagnosis. While I am older than most of you (I am 65) I have been able to look at life through different eyes than before my diagnosis. I look at things that I used to think were important ... but now see how insignificant they really are. I don't have the time or energy to hold grudges or worry about things I can't change. It all goes back to the Serenity Prayer. I am not a religious person ... but the words seem to say it all so perfectly:

    God grant me the serenity
    to accept the things I cannot change;
    courage to change the things I can;
    and wisdom to know the difference.

    And ... I truly believe I am learning the difference. This whole "journey" has given me an appreciation for life and a feeling of calm about the future. I realize that I am much stronger than I ever thought I could be.

    hugs.
    teena
  • MAJW
    MAJW Member Posts: 2,510 Member
    #4
    BETH.....
    For me, my cancer dx made me take a good hard look at my own mortality.....and in doing so, I started looking back on my life......I have to say, I made peace with past hangups, etc., about 10 years ago, so that didn't seem to be the problem....For me I think the dx just brought to the surface a multitude of emotions......all the "what if's".....I had to reconcile these feelings and not dwell on the "what if's." Some days I couldn't even identify what was wrong with me, other than having bc....But now I am on the road to reclaiming my life.....I feel I have had my priorities straight, but even more so now...as someone else said, what seemed to be important before, other than my family, really isn't.
    I just think our emotions are all over the place during this horrible ordeal and it really is hard to identify what brings them to the surface, other than the bc.....

    Just try and be kind to yourself.......for the first time in my entire life, I decided,as I was going through all the treatments, to become selfish! IT worked for me.......I have cut out anything that I feel is toxic to me and my health...that includes some people....who I thought were friends, but proved otherwise.....and if there's something I don't want to do, I don't......

    Don't beat yourself up....save all that energy in regaining your good health......
    My best wishes to you...
  • elizarose
    elizarose Member Posts: 124
    #5
    MAJW said:

    BETH.....
    For me, my cancer dx made me take a good hard look at my own mortality.....and in doing so, I started looking back on my life......I have to say, I made peace with past hangups, etc., about 10 years ago, so that didn't seem to be the problem....For me I think the dx just brought to the surface a multitude of emotions......all the "what if's".....I had to reconcile these feelings and not dwell on the "what if's." Some days I couldn't even identify what was wrong with me, other than having bc....But now I am on the road to reclaiming my life.....I feel I have had my priorities straight, but even more so now...as someone else said, what seemed to be important before, other than my family, really isn't.
    I just think our emotions are all over the place during this horrible ordeal and it really is hard to identify what brings them to the surface, other than the bc.....

    Just try and be kind to yourself.......for the first time in my entire life, I decided,as I was going through all the treatments, to become selfish! IT worked for me.......I have cut out anything that I feel is toxic to me and my health...that includes some people....who I thought were friends, but proved otherwise.....and if there's something I don't want to do, I don't......

    Don't beat yourself up....save all that energy in regaining your good health......
    My best wishes to you...

    I am getting rid of the
    I am getting rid of the toxins in my life too, including people! And I'm learning to take care of myself as if I really matter.
  • debbie1162
    debbie1162 Member Posts: 36
    #6
    I think
    I am looking at things different since the big C. I am not in for the Drama! Living each day fully and be thankful for each day and all of my loved ones and friends.
  • scout5000
    scout5000 Member Posts: 94 Member
    #7
    Me too
    My cancer diagnosis brought all sorts of emotional baggage to the surface. I started seeing a psychologist a couple of months ago, thinking I needed help dealing with having cancer. Now we have gotten to the point where we are addressing my past. It is helping me so much and I think I will be a better person in the long run.

Discussion Boards