can anyone help?

jcohee
jcohee Member Posts: 7
edited March 2014 in Stomach Cancer #1
my son's fight with stomach cancer stg IV began 3 weeks ago . He's only 23 for god's sake, i'm trying to cope but not doing well, i have 4 children at home, including a 2-almost 3 year old and am a single mother. I can't shake the constant guilt and sense of doom, i am trying to stay calm, not panick and be strong and encouraging for him but i cannot lose him i will not survive, i'm having trouble doing the simplest of tasks, i know this sounds selfish because of the other children but he's my first-born and the love of my life....i cannot bear the thought of life without him, please help, i need hope. Is this normal? There is hope for surgery after chemo but i cannot get past the "what if's". I don't know what to do , this is consuming me.

Comments

  • LWJ
    LWJ Member Posts: 2
    #2
    Prayer
    I am so sorry to hear about your son. I will certainly keep him and you in my prayers. My only advise is to pray that God will take care of him and seek the best medical care you can find. It is hard to understand why young people get sick like this but I do know that God will give you the strength to get through it, whether it turns out the way you want it to or not. My husband and I lost our daughter about 18 years ago. She was almost 3 years old and died from heart surgery complications. I don't say this to be gloom and doom about your son, I am telling you this to say that God is there with you through everything, good and bad. He loves you and will help you through it. Our son was almost 7 at the time of our daughter's death and it was very important for us to show him that he was important to us too. Also to show him that we have faith in God to take care of us, and He has and He will take care of you and your son and your family. I don't say it will be easy but you can survive, with God's help.
    Do you go to church? If not find a church that is Bible based. A church that believes that Jesus Christ is the son of God,that He is our Saviour and one that is supportive to its members. You need someone to help you and your family during this time and people to pray for you. I know this helps, I know from experience.
    I pray that God will heal your son, but mostly I pray that His will is done. He knows what is best for us all.
  • imnotsick
    imnotsick Member Posts: 12
    #3
    I am so sorry to hear about
    I am so sorry to hear about the nightmare you are going thru. I can not imagine how hard this is for you. I lost my MOM to pancreatic cancer and remember how hard it was to deal with. I am also a cancer survivor. It will be 4 years since my surgery and 3 1/2 years since ending treatment for STOMACH cancer. THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE! What I do know is that YOU WILL GET THRU THIS! Be supportive and HOPEFULL and CONVINCED that he will be in whatever that percentage is that becomes survivors. Someone has to be in that per cent ,know that he will be the one. He also needs to beleive he will beat it. He is youong - he can do it! You MUST get past the "what if's. You can not change the past or know the furture , so the only thing you CAN DO is deal with TODAY!!

    Very important that he is seen by a large regional cancer center, It is worth traveling if he has to, even if it is only for a second opinion.

    My prayers are with both of you
  • jcohee
    jcohee Member Posts: 7
    #4
    imnotsick said:

    I am so sorry to hear about
    I am so sorry to hear about the nightmare you are going thru. I can not imagine how hard this is for you. I lost my MOM to pancreatic cancer and remember how hard it was to deal with. I am also a cancer survivor. It will be 4 years since my surgery and 3 1/2 years since ending treatment for STOMACH cancer. THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE! What I do know is that YOU WILL GET THRU THIS! Be supportive and HOPEFULL and CONVINCED that he will be in whatever that percentage is that becomes survivors. Someone has to be in that per cent ,know that he will be the one. He also needs to beleive he will beat it. He is youong - he can do it! You MUST get past the "what if's. You can not change the past or know the furture , so the only thing you CAN DO is deal with TODAY!!

    Very important that he is seen by a large regional cancer center, It is worth traveling if he has to, even if it is only for a second opinion.

    My prayers are with both of you

    a thank you
    thank you both for you prayers and story,very sorry to hear about your mom. it is so good to hear from someone who has gone through this and come out on the other side. My son went to the nearest hospital, stayed there for pancreatitiis and diagnosis and began his treatmnt there, so it's all happened so fasst haven't really thought much about a second opinion but i am very pleased with his oncologist so far and treatment, his doctor is encouraging and optomistic and has even said the word "cure " to me. I have been considering, though, taking him to IU med center, this is where Lance Armstrong recieved his treatment, but haven't acted as yet since he has just completed his first round of chemo. I don't know what a regional cancer center is. Please let me know, finances are an issue, of course he had no private insurance at 23. Congratulations on your victory and my prayers are with you too, can you tell me though, was it a long, tough road? set-backs? depression, im sure, any other suggestions or insights would be great and thanks for the words of hope, we both need that so much right now. :)
  • vijendrasnv
    vijendrasnv Member Posts: 15
    #5
    jcohee said:

    a thank you
    thank you both for you prayers and story,very sorry to hear about your mom. it is so good to hear from someone who has gone through this and come out on the other side. My son went to the nearest hospital, stayed there for pancreatitiis and diagnosis and began his treatmnt there, so it's all happened so fasst haven't really thought much about a second opinion but i am very pleased with his oncologist so far and treatment, his doctor is encouraging and optomistic and has even said the word "cure " to me. I have been considering, though, taking him to IU med center, this is where Lance Armstrong recieved his treatment, but haven't acted as yet since he has just completed his first round of chemo. I don't know what a regional cancer center is. Please let me know, finances are an issue, of course he had no private insurance at 23. Congratulations on your victory and my prayers are with you too, can you tell me though, was it a long, tough road? set-backs? depression, im sure, any other suggestions or insights would be great and thanks for the words of hope, we both need that so much right now. :)

    I must say you dont need to
    I must say you dont need to be that much worried about the things it will all recover soon.

    Thanks!
  • OCTOMAN
    OCTOMAN Member Posts: 21
    #6
    LWJ said:

    Prayer
    I am so sorry to hear about your son. I will certainly keep him and you in my prayers. My only advise is to pray that God will take care of him and seek the best medical care you can find. It is hard to understand why young people get sick like this but I do know that God will give you the strength to get through it, whether it turns out the way you want it to or not. My husband and I lost our daughter about 18 years ago. She was almost 3 years old and died from heart surgery complications. I don't say this to be gloom and doom about your son, I am telling you this to say that God is there with you through everything, good and bad. He loves you and will help you through it. Our son was almost 7 at the time of our daughter's death and it was very important for us to show him that he was important to us too. Also to show him that we have faith in God to take care of us, and He has and He will take care of you and your son and your family. I don't say it will be easy but you can survive, with God's help.
    Do you go to church? If not find a church that is Bible based. A church that believes that Jesus Christ is the son of God,that He is our Saviour and one that is supportive to its members. You need someone to help you and your family during this time and people to pray for you. I know this helps, I know from experience.
    I pray that God will heal your son, but mostly I pray that His will is done. He knows what is best for us all.

    GOD AND CANCER
    A GOD WHO SITS BACK AND LETS PEOPLE DIE,BECAUSE THERE IS NO ONE TO PRAY FOR THEM OR THEY CANNOT PRAY?


    SORRY MY VERSION OF GOD IS A LOVING CARING GOD,WHO HELPS YOU FACE LIFES SLINGS AND ARROWS OF OUTRAGEOUS FORTUNE.


    EVEN IF YOU DONT BELIEVE IN GOD,PRAYER CAN HELP .

    WITH MY GOD NO ONE IS EXCLUDED.GOD IS LOVE.AND IS FOR EVERYONE.
  • livestrong_fighter
    livestrong_fighter Member Posts: 39
    #7
    Be strong!
    Your son is so young, he will recover soon and could beat all the odds, read him the book "It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life ", he will be encouraged!

    I pray for you and your son!
  • livestrong_fighter
    livestrong_fighter Member Posts: 39
    #8
    Be strong!
    Your son is so young, he will recover soon and could beat all the odds, read him the book "It's Not About the Bike: My Journey Back to Life ", he will be encouraged!

    I pray for you and your son!

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