Living with cancer/treatment a post for newbies and lurkers

Sonia32
Sonia32 Member Posts: 1,071 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
I was jusr thinking about starting this post this morning, and if some of you can add to it that would be great. It's just for newbies, and lurkers out there who are afraid to post, not sure what life is like living with cancer or going through treatment. Just thought it might help, as I know we have our bio page etc but not everyone will check it first time around until they post. Anyway I will kick it off

I'm the crazy chick from across the pond in England Sonia. I was diagnosed with cancer in Feb 09 had my operation in March to remove tumour. Turned out to be stage 3, 10/11 lymph nodes involved. After hearing that news immediately had my first panic attack thought I was going to die. Slowly came to terms with it, was on the english site Macmillan, but found it to depressing, until I found myself here, where everyone is positive and upbeat, even though we have our down days which is ok to have, everyone still manages to support each other. Anyway started suffering from depression again, then got diagnosed with panic and anxiety related disorder related to the depression.
I have my 6/8 chemo on monday (so any regular family members reading this need prayers and positive thoughts I get through it fine, as my anxiety has been going over time on me this week)
I am off work, have been since last December, but hoping to go back on the 23rd November, it wil be then 7 days before my last chemo god willing)
I have been at home, keeping busy by keeping intouch with friends meeting them when I can. Seeing family when I can. Shopping, doing household chores when I am able to. Exercising when I can, and taking vitamins, and hopefully juicing soon. My depression has worsened, but have changed anti depressant meds, hopefully they should kick in soon. My point to all this I have come this far, from originally thinking I would not be able to cope! Even though I take each day as it comes, it's still hard with my depression, anxiety/panic but I try and not let it beat me as best as I can. With all the support I have, especially of this board. So if you are a newbie I hope my post and anyone else who adds has helped that you can get on with your life, you will have your up and down days but you can get through this. Any I hope any lurkers out there will have the courage to post, and no they are not alone.

Big hugs to you all
Sonia

Comments

  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    #2
    Hi Sonia
    Here the other thread with info from other members
    http://csn.cancer.org/node/166961

    Hope you're feeling well
    -phil
  • Sonia32
    Sonia32 Member Posts: 1,071 Member
    #3
    PhillieG said:

    Hi Sonia
    Here the other thread with info from other members
    http://csn.cancer.org/node/166961

    Hope you're feeling well
    -phil

    doh
    lol I did not know that uncle phil ;-) well at least my details are up for all to see
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    #4
    Sonia32 said:

    doh
    lol I did not know that uncle phil ;-) well at least my details are up for all to see

    :-)
    Sonia, how are you supposed to know this? It's interesting to read more about you and now this thread is back up top for others to add to.
    -u phil ;-)
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    #5
    depression/anxiety
    Hello Sonia and husband.aLLOW ME TO DIGRESS: In Nov 2000 i was diagnosed with COPD due to my long-term cigarette smoking, which I stopped in July 2001. By mid 2002 severe depression took over where I couln't get out of bed to go to work and had no desire to do anything. Regular doctor(my lung doctor by then) referred me to excellent shrink who, thru therapy sessions and meds (Zoloft/Xanax)got be back to living again to the extent that I gained the weight/strength I had lost prior to diagnosis. Eventually weaned my self off meds.Retired from work, Then, in May 2009, was diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer and everything really changed in my life. Besides being petrified, as chemo/radiation began, depression/anxiety soared but old shrink no longer accepted my insurance and to pay out of pocket was exorbitant. After 2 1/2 weeks of cancer treatment finally saw another psychologist/psychiatrist but realized I gotta do this myself if I want to live and I need to live for my girlfriend (her problems are another mess but she's keeping me going, changing my bag as needed, shopping, cleaning, cooking,etc). It was difficult fitting in shrink appointments after doing chemo and radiation and feeling as **** as i did due to treatments.Having recently undergone colostomy its obvious to me the only thing I can do is continue to look forward and beat this illness. Depression and anxiety are natural responses to whats happened in our lives and we all cope in our own way. The one thing none of us can afford to do is give up,no matter what. Outside of my girlfriend and doctors, I'm on my own. Find this website very comforting and informative and hope my brief bio can help someone else into being strong to fight for life....thanking those who've read this....steve
  • Shayenne
    Shayenne Member Posts: 2,342
    #6
    coloCan said:

    depression/anxiety
    Hello Sonia and husband.aLLOW ME TO DIGRESS: In Nov 2000 i was diagnosed with COPD due to my long-term cigarette smoking, which I stopped in July 2001. By mid 2002 severe depression took over where I couln't get out of bed to go to work and had no desire to do anything. Regular doctor(my lung doctor by then) referred me to excellent shrink who, thru therapy sessions and meds (Zoloft/Xanax)got be back to living again to the extent that I gained the weight/strength I had lost prior to diagnosis. Eventually weaned my self off meds.Retired from work, Then, in May 2009, was diagnosed with stage 3 colorectal cancer and everything really changed in my life. Besides being petrified, as chemo/radiation began, depression/anxiety soared but old shrink no longer accepted my insurance and to pay out of pocket was exorbitant. After 2 1/2 weeks of cancer treatment finally saw another psychologist/psychiatrist but realized I gotta do this myself if I want to live and I need to live for my girlfriend (her problems are another mess but she's keeping me going, changing my bag as needed, shopping, cleaning, cooking,etc). It was difficult fitting in shrink appointments after doing chemo and radiation and feeling as **** as i did due to treatments.Having recently undergone colostomy its obvious to me the only thing I can do is continue to look forward and beat this illness. Depression and anxiety are natural responses to whats happened in our lives and we all cope in our own way. The one thing none of us can afford to do is give up,no matter what. Outside of my girlfriend and doctors, I'm on my own. Find this website very comforting and informative and hope my brief bio can help someone else into being strong to fight for life....thanking those who've read this....steve

    Hey Steve....
    ... Has your onc prescribed you anything for the depression and anxiety? There are medicines out there that can really help with it, if you give it some time. I am Zoloft, which takes alot of my edge off and I am not so weepy as I used to be, but it took a month to kick in, and am on 100 mg, and I find it really helps. I am also on Ativan for the anxiety which also helps, now I know medicines aren't a cure all, we still have our down days, but not so bad, more good days, but no one has to suffer in the darkness, and hope maybe you get some help with that, you also have us :)

    Hugsss!
    ~Donna

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