Is it an obvious decision to start staying hom more?

Financial State?
What type of cancer does your husband have and what stage? I would say that if you are able to stay home and his condition would get better if you did,then that would probably be my choice. Of course, if you cannot survive financial wise then that choice is out of your hands.
It must be very stressful to want to be home with him yet also needing to work. A terrible subject, but if something happened to your husband would you be o.k. financially without working? If not,then would your job be in jeapordy if you took an extended leave?
Don't do anything that would put you in a vulnerable position should you be alone one day. The best scenerio would be that your employer would let you take the time you need without sacrificing your position when the time comes that you need to return.
I would say that your husband would probably like having you home [ nagging or not ]. I hope everything works out for you and your husband- its terrible what this disease does to peoples lives, and the hard decisions we are faced with.

Keep us posted on how things work out for you,
Take Care, Trish

winthefight said:

Finance
HI Amy,

Making the decision to take time off vs staying to assist your love one is certainly a tough decision. It is can be mind boggling. I'm not sure of your hubby's situation if he is eligible for STD or LTD. But, what I would suggest is if you have not done so already, is to apply for SSD for your hubby. I'm told by an inside source, cancer is on the list. He should be approved to get SSD. That may help you financially.

Good luck to both of you.

SSD
previous poster is correct, you can apply for social security disability if your husband is eligible AND he is will disabled a minimum of 6 months. You cannot collect a check until the person as been disabled for a full 6 months -- they will count backwards, so if you husband was first diagnosed in April that is when they will begin counting from. It actually was not a difficult process and you can do it all online -- just make sure you have ALL his work history (places worked, dates, etc) as well as a list of ALL doctors he has seen - I had to enter ever single doctor and hospital he had been too. It took about 2-3 hours to complete the on line forms, but overall it was very easy. After I completed the forms we got a letter in the mail telling us they would call us on a specific date/time which they did and they informed us then that he had qualified and when the first check would come (3 months after we applied since he had not been disabled for 6 months yet)

You know best what your
You know best what your situation is for both you and your husband. Since he is still mobile your being at work my be keeping him mobile. Having something to do keeps my husband moving.
Having financial difficulties can add as much stress as the medical situation and you do need to think and plan for both of you and for you should the worst happen.
This may sound strange, but my first thought at reading your post was your need to monitor him. Perhaps a web cam set up would allow you to see him when you need while at work.
You are now in my prayers.
Denise

decision to start staying home
Hi Amy

I have been battling the same question over the last month or so. My husband was diagnosed with GBM in Mar 09, had surgery then and we were told the grim prognosis. He had to have further surgery in May as his stitches from the March surgery had not healed , causing fluid build up in the cavity created when they romved his tumour (left frontal lobe) which led to him havign an infection and another massive seizure. He was back in hospital again in August for another infection (short stay of 2 days only this time). The scan done on 30 Jul shows a recurrence / new tumour. We find out tomorrow if he needs further surgery.
In spite of all this he is still able to take care of himself (he too is deteriorating). I am currently working full time although I move my hours around so I can attend all doctors appointments with him. When we found out about the new growth/recurrence, I figured it was a wake up call that I should rethink what I was doing so as not to have any regrets later. I took a week off work and we took our girls (aged 3 and 9) for a holiday by the beach. Its probably the best decision we have made since diagnosis. We have renewed our bonds as a family and even hubby is more optimistic. He has now gone back to work 2 days a week (although chemo still has him feeling tired) because he has said its soemthing he needs to do. I drive him to and from work and the hour / 45 min in the car with him in the morning and evening has been a special time.
Because of our girls, I think my continuing to work gives them a sense of "normality". However, I worry all the time if this is the right decision.
Its not hubby's first brush with cancer, he had a grade 3 tumour removed in 2001 but this time around he has issues with his heart and that means each surgery is high risk. The thought that I may not have adequate warning of impending death worries me a lot. (Please note this does not mean we have given up the good fight. We mean to give it our best shot to try to prevent hubby from being a statistic.
I guess I haven't given you any answers but I thought it might help to know someone else has the same worries?