A couple of Sunday laughs

ANSWER MY PRAYER--PLEASE

Jonathan, the Vicar's very young son asked his father, 'Daddy, I notice every Sunday morning when you first climb into the pulpit to give your sermon, you bow your head for a moment. What are you doing?'
The father answered, 'I'm asking the Lord to give me a good sermon.'
Jonathan inquired, 'Then why doesn't he?'

TAKE NO OFFENSE:

'I hope you didn't take it personally, Father, 'an embarrassed woman said after a church service, 'when my husband walked out during your sermon.' 'I did find it rather disconcerting,' the vicar replied.

'It's not a reflection on you, Father' insisted the church goer. 'Christopher has been walking in his sleep ever since he was a child.'