squamous cell carcinoma of nasal septum
Comments
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Hi Vicki,vikilee said:My sister Michelle
Hi everyone-------Today is 11-14-08 and my sister Michelle had a Rhinectomy this afternoon. We were at the hospital for about 13 hours and just arrived home a little while ago. After the surgery, her doctor came in and told us that they removed her entire nose and some tissue above her lip and shaved off some of the bone in her palate. We were also informed that the tumor has spread to the skull base; just aboe her eyebrows and she will need another surgery with a neurosurgeon. Her biggest fear is having this disease spread to her brain; partially because my father died from a brain tumor (glioblastoma multiforme). Has anyone out there received their prosthetic nose yet and how real does it look and feel. We are all trying to reassure her, but this cancer is so rare that we cannot find anyone to talk with her. She lives in Marin County, just north of San Francisco. If you know of any support groups or anyone with this disease, please leave word at this site. Anyway, thanks for letting me vent and I hope all of you are better and on the road to a speedy recovery. Love, Vicki
Check out the story on the website below. There is also an email at the end of the story where you might be able to get some more info. Prayers and good luck to you and your sister!
http://www.oncolink.org/coping/article.cfm?c=6&s=31&ss=76&id=2520 -
EyeglassesMLC53 said:Hi Vicki,
Check out the story on the website below. There is also an email at the end of the story where you might be able to get some more info. Prayers and good luck to you and your sister!
http://www.oncolink.org/coping/article.cfm?c=6&s=31&ss=76&id=252
Hi----------------Does anyone out there; who's had a rhinectomy, wear glasses? If so, how do they fit on your face? Do you need special glasses? Also; has anyone had radiation after a rhinectomy? I'm still trying to collect information for my sister, Michelle. Thanks for all the prayers that everyone has sent. God Bless all of you! Vicki0 -
Blayne
Hi-----------------------I was just wondering how you are doing and what your life is like at this point. My sister Michelle is facing chemotherapy and radiation. After that, healing and a new nose. What's it like having a prosthetic anyway? Can you, or anyone else, shed some light on this. Hope everyone out there is doing better. Love and prayers to all. Vicki0 -
nasopharynx cancerthobby said:Hi Melly,
My name is Teresa and I am 46. I live south of Atlanta Georgia USA. I think I have the same type of cancer as you. I have cancer of the nasophlaranyx. Which is the area behind the nose.It was squamas cell.I was told it was rare & the time its noticed it has usually spread. When they found mine it had spread to all the sinus paths on the right side of my face. Then into the lymph nodes in my neck,my gums even started growing into my ear. That was last July. They couldn't do surgery because it was too advanced. I had chemo and radiation done at the same time. Before they could start I had to have 5 teeth pulled because of the cancer. I had a stomach tube put in because you wont be able to eat. I haven't eaten anything by mouth since last Aug. I wont kid you the treatment I had was very tough. I had radiation 5 days a week for three months and had the same amount of strong chemo for the same length of time. I was so sick during this time that a lot of time I couldn't go anywhere. When I moved around I would throw up. I lost 40 pounds. But after treatment stopped they did a ct scan and my cancer was gone. I will have another scan next month to see if it has come back or spread anywhere else. I think everything is okay though. Its been the toughest thing I have ever had to do. I would get another opinion. And weigh the odds. I haven't had many side effects from my treatment. A little hearing and vision loss because of nerves that were effected. A dry mouth because my salivary gland was destroyed. I just carry water around with me. I know it is scarry and I wish you good luck. I was told my chances of survival werent that good. But all that has changed! So keep your hope and beleive in the power of prayer.
Teresa
Hi Teresa
My husband is completing treatment for stage IV nasopharyngeal cancer and boy has it been grueling.What stage were you?I am trying to find out whether this type of cancer is slow or fast growing.Would you happen to know?
Best to you,
Susanne0 -
Septum cancer surgery and consequences.vikilee said:Blayne
Hi-----------------------I was just wondering how you are doing and what your life is like at this point. My sister Michelle is facing chemotherapy and radiation. After that, healing and a new nose. What's it like having a prosthetic anyway? Can you, or anyone else, shed some light on this. Hope everyone out there is doing better. Love and prayers to all. Vicki
Just been confirmed to have scamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum.
Inquiring about posible loss of muy septum, nose, perhaps palate and teeth, surgeon told me that such results are not anymore expected except in rare occasions. He called those procedures as old and unnecessary in most instances, adding that surgery procedures have improved.
I don't see any postings for years 2008 and 2009, is my doctor correct or he is just being kind enough not to scare the hibijybis out of me?
Tecolote.0 -
scc of the nasal septumTecolote said:Septum cancer surgery and consequences.
Just been confirmed to have scamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum.
Inquiring about posible loss of muy septum, nose, perhaps palate and teeth, surgeon told me that such results are not anymore expected except in rare occasions. He called those procedures as old and unnecessary in most instances, adding that surgery procedures have improved.
I don't see any postings for years 2008 and 2009, is my doctor correct or he is just being kind enough not to scare the hibijybis out of me?
Tecolote.
Hi Tecolote, I had scc of the nasal septum in aug 05. I had surgery, radiation and chemo and am fine now. I had the entire inside of my nose removed. I was stage 2, grade 2,so considered an early stage. It all depends on your stage etc as to what treatments they do. Well that's how they decide on treatment here in the UK, ie the earlier the diagnosis the less treatment with nasal cancer, as with most other cancers too. My nose looks a little strange, sort of squishy and flatter and a bit bent to one side lol but hey ho i am alive. I could have reconstruction but cannot be bothered. I have become acustomed to the way I look now. Which is a major achievement, as I was soooooooooooo vain before. My life now is extremely busy and I enjoy it so much more than ever before the cancer. You can email me at tricia_halcyon@yahoo.co.uk if you would like to share your experience. I would welcome hearing about your progress. Take care luv Tricia0 -
Sqaumous cell of the nasal septumTecolote said:Septum cancer surgery and consequences.
Just been confirmed to have scamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum.
Inquiring about posible loss of muy septum, nose, perhaps palate and teeth, surgeon told me that such results are not anymore expected except in rare occasions. He called those procedures as old and unnecessary in most instances, adding that surgery procedures have improved.
I don't see any postings for years 2008 and 2009, is my doctor correct or he is just being kind enough not to scare the hibijybis out of me?
Tecolote.
WOW First off let me say how amazed I was to find out just how many people do have this form of cancer. I was diagnosed about three weeks ago and am now in treatment at Johns Hopkins, Maryland.
My cancer is in my left nasal cavity- has spread behind the left eye- has eaten through the bone that separates the nose from the brain and the cancer is on brain matter now. In my case I was due to have surgery with a neurosurgeon but before that cound happen Dr. Onc decided chemo would be better treatment. I have started chemo and I'm hopeful. Surgery would have meant going through the forehead and they really didn't get into specifics about loss. At this point I am doing chemo- and hopefully it will shrink my tumor enough for surgery without much damage (or better yet chemo wipes the whole thing out completely- that would be cool) and then radiation to blast whatever might be left over lurking. May I ask do you do what I do and try to figure out where it all came from? I've got to stop that- because its a real 'tailchaser" when you get going. Oh- sorry before I sign off -I'm 48 and female.. how old are you?
Hang in there and find out all you can..AND DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT FOR YOU
Jennifer0 -
Where did it come fromJennifer48 said:Sqaumous cell of the nasal septum
WOW First off let me say how amazed I was to find out just how many people do have this form of cancer. I was diagnosed about three weeks ago and am now in treatment at Johns Hopkins, Maryland.
My cancer is in my left nasal cavity- has spread behind the left eye- has eaten through the bone that separates the nose from the brain and the cancer is on brain matter now. In my case I was due to have surgery with a neurosurgeon but before that cound happen Dr. Onc decided chemo would be better treatment. I have started chemo and I'm hopeful. Surgery would have meant going through the forehead and they really didn't get into specifics about loss. At this point I am doing chemo- and hopefully it will shrink my tumor enough for surgery without much damage (or better yet chemo wipes the whole thing out completely- that would be cool) and then radiation to blast whatever might be left over lurking. May I ask do you do what I do and try to figure out where it all came from? I've got to stop that- because its a real 'tailchaser" when you get going. Oh- sorry before I sign off -I'm 48 and female.. how old are you?
Hang in there and find out all you can..AND DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT FOR YOU
Jennifer
Hi Jennifer, I had sinus cancer (esthesionueroblastoma) it was in my ethmoid sinus, nasopharnx and sinus cavity. Two surgeries (endoscopic) and 6 weeks of radiation and I am recovering nicely. I totally am with you on the "where did it come from". For months I tried to figure out what I did when I was in my wild "20's", that could have given me this rare cancer or is it from bad materials used in my brand new house (that I only lived in 10 months before diagnosed). I am 42 and work in the management offices of the 3rd largest cabinet manufacturer in the US. Could it be the wood dust? I drove myself crazy. I finally made a list of everything I thought could have cuased it and gave it to my doctor and told him I needed peace of mind. He looked at my list, kinda chucked at some of the stuff I had written on it, and told me that they believe my type of cancer is environmental related, all though there is no direct connection. And that I needed to understand that it was nothing I did to myself, it was just something I got.
I think we all try and blame ourselves when we get sick, so give yourself some peace, do what I did and make a list of what you think you may have done and give it to your doctor. He will help you make peace with it.
Cancer sucks, think positive happy thoughts, and LAUGH all the way through your treatments!!
Sirena0 -
Nasal CancerSIRENAF42 said:Where did it come from
Hi Jennifer, I had sinus cancer (esthesionueroblastoma) it was in my ethmoid sinus, nasopharnx and sinus cavity. Two surgeries (endoscopic) and 6 weeks of radiation and I am recovering nicely. I totally am with you on the "where did it come from". For months I tried to figure out what I did when I was in my wild "20's", that could have given me this rare cancer or is it from bad materials used in my brand new house (that I only lived in 10 months before diagnosed). I am 42 and work in the management offices of the 3rd largest cabinet manufacturer in the US. Could it be the wood dust? I drove myself crazy. I finally made a list of everything I thought could have cuased it and gave it to my doctor and told him I needed peace of mind. He looked at my list, kinda chucked at some of the stuff I had written on it, and told me that they believe my type of cancer is environmental related, all though there is no direct connection. And that I needed to understand that it was nothing I did to myself, it was just something I got.
I think we all try and blame ourselves when we get sick, so give yourself some peace, do what I did and make a list of what you think you may have done and give it to your doctor. He will help you make peace with it.
Cancer sucks, think positive happy thoughts, and LAUGH all the way through your treatments!!
Sirena
Hi all,
Today is four years to the day since i had surgery and therapy for a squamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum, floor of the nose (roof of mouth), and into my sinus.
I was 25 years old at the time and the youngest known case in Australia.
I has radical surgery to remove the tumour which was diagnosed as being six postage stamps in size.Everyhting other than the skin of my nose was basically removed and as a result i had skin grafts taken from my wrist as well as bone from my arm and cartilage from my ribs to reconstruct. Prior to surgery i had a tube inserted into my stomach. I had radiotherapy and chemotherapy for seven weeks. Overall i lost 19 kilograms (nearly 42 pounds)
So much has happened since then. I have had further reconstructive surgery as the radiotherpay had damaged my first reconstruction. I am currently recovering from a surgery to repair my soft palate as it was removed. Unfortunately it hasnt healed too well and it looks like the graft is dying. This is due to the prior radiotherapy treatment. I am on a soft diet and in the past three weeks have lost a further 5 kilos (11 pounds).
I really wish everyone the best with their treatment.
Take Care0 -
hiSIRENAF42 said:Where did it come from
Hi Jennifer, I had sinus cancer (esthesionueroblastoma) it was in my ethmoid sinus, nasopharnx and sinus cavity. Two surgeries (endoscopic) and 6 weeks of radiation and I am recovering nicely. I totally am with you on the "where did it come from". For months I tried to figure out what I did when I was in my wild "20's", that could have given me this rare cancer or is it from bad materials used in my brand new house (that I only lived in 10 months before diagnosed). I am 42 and work in the management offices of the 3rd largest cabinet manufacturer in the US. Could it be the wood dust? I drove myself crazy. I finally made a list of everything I thought could have cuased it and gave it to my doctor and told him I needed peace of mind. He looked at my list, kinda chucked at some of the stuff I had written on it, and told me that they believe my type of cancer is environmental related, all though there is no direct connection. And that I needed to understand that it was nothing I did to myself, it was just something I got.
I think we all try and blame ourselves when we get sick, so give yourself some peace, do what I did and make a list of what you think you may have done and give it to your doctor. He will help you make peace with it.
Cancer sucks, think positive happy thoughts, and LAUGH all the way through your treatments!!
Sirena
Sirenfa, I was told that one of the risks was working with wood dust! I am surprised they havent mentioned that to you.0 -
Wood DustTricia02 said:hi
Sirenfa, I was told that one of the risks was working with wood dust! I am surprised they havent mentioned that to you.
Not one person has said "OH my god you work around a lot of wood dust".... I read about it and asked, and it was dismissed as its not what you do, you just got it.... I have met several others with ENB and 2 of them work with wood dust, one in furniture and the other in constuction. I go to see my doc again in July and I plan on clarifying where I work and see if I should be concernced about reoccurence because I am employed where wood dust is part of my every day life 50 hours a week. In 2006, when the US was building houses at alarming rates we increased production of cabinets from 3000 a day to 10,000 per day. I got sick in 2007. Hmmmmmmm0 -
hiSIRENAF42 said:Wood Dust
Not one person has said "OH my god you work around a lot of wood dust".... I read about it and asked, and it was dismissed as its not what you do, you just got it.... I have met several others with ENB and 2 of them work with wood dust, one in furniture and the other in constuction. I go to see my doc again in July and I plan on clarifying where I work and see if I should be concernced about reoccurence because I am employed where wood dust is part of my every day life 50 hours a week. In 2006, when the US was building houses at alarming rates we increased production of cabinets from 3000 a day to 10,000 per day. I got sick in 2007. Hmmmmmmm
I would definitely clarify that with your doctors. I remember being asked did I work with sawdust? There is also a connection with hydrocarbons and salt in the Asian diet apparently. I myself have never worked with with any of these and interstingly enough I have never taken salt with food. I am wondering if yours is an industrial injury - just thinking out loud here. I am however approaching 4 years cancer free and doing fabulous.0 -
treratmentamarleaux2 said:Melly,
My husband has just been told he has squamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum. I am looking for someone just like you to see how you are doing and what treatment you have been taking. they are talking about removing my husbands nose and are doing a MRI to see how bad the cancer really is. It appears that it is rare and no one seems to have answers at this time. I hope you can help us. my husband is very scared and looking for someone like you to tlak to. please write back. sincerely, alice marleaux
I started with a perforated septum. After the pet scan they discovered squamous cell in my maxilla. They removed 5 front teeth, soft palate, and found some lymphnodes in my neck. Had 33 sessions of radiation after surgery and have faseteeth,or obturator, filling up the void. Not real pretty but does the job.Still on a soft diet but back to work. My surgeon was great. Any question I can answer I'd be glad to.
Falsetreeth, R0 -
Check my posting.Tecolote said:Septum cancer surgery and consequences.
Just been confirmed to have scamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum.
Inquiring about posible loss of muy septum, nose, perhaps palate and teeth, surgeon told me that such results are not anymore expected except in rare occasions. He called those procedures as old and unnecessary in most instances, adding that surgery procedures have improved.
I don't see any postings for years 2008 and 2009, is my doctor correct or he is just being kind enough not to scare the hibijybis out of me?
Tecolote.
Check my posting. Falseteeth.0 -
Hi JenniferJennifer48 said:Sqaumous cell of the nasal septum
WOW First off let me say how amazed I was to find out just how many people do have this form of cancer. I was diagnosed about three weeks ago and am now in treatment at Johns Hopkins, Maryland.
My cancer is in my left nasal cavity- has spread behind the left eye- has eaten through the bone that separates the nose from the brain and the cancer is on brain matter now. In my case I was due to have surgery with a neurosurgeon but before that cound happen Dr. Onc decided chemo would be better treatment. I have started chemo and I'm hopeful. Surgery would have meant going through the forehead and they really didn't get into specifics about loss. At this point I am doing chemo- and hopefully it will shrink my tumor enough for surgery without much damage (or better yet chemo wipes the whole thing out completely- that would be cool) and then radiation to blast whatever might be left over lurking. May I ask do you do what I do and try to figure out where it all came from? I've got to stop that- because its a real 'tailchaser" when you get going. Oh- sorry before I sign off -I'm 48 and female.. how old are you?
Hang in there and find out all you can..AND DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT FOR YOU
Jennifer
I've just had
Hi Jennifer
I've just had mri for mass on nasal septum I have constant discomfort in my right hand side of my face and alot of headaches which are getting worse and discomfort in my ears and upper neck. I'm also very tired much of the time after being really fit, what symptoms did you have and how quickly were things diagnosed?
Sarah uk0 -
SymptomsSarah Sq said:Hi Jennifer
I've just had
Hi Jennifer
I've just had mri for mass on nasal septum I have constant discomfort in my right hand side of my face and alot of headaches which are getting worse and discomfort in my ears and upper neck. I'm also very tired much of the time after being really fit, what symptoms did you have and how quickly were things diagnosed?
Sarah uk
I thought I had hay fever as I felt a little blocked in my right nostril, but only mildly so. In had been to doc twice and the anti histamines hadn't worked, so I was quickly referred to an ENT specialist who diagnosed squamous cell carcinoma of the nasal septum stage 2 grade 2. I was whisked into hospital that week, radical surgery to remove septum and a lot of the inside of my nose, actually the lot inside. I then healed a bit for 6 weeks and started radiation treatment and 5 days of chemo. This was all in August 05. I am free of cancer today and enjoying life immensely. In fact I enjoy my life so much more than prior to cancer. It was the KNOCK KNOCK I and Nick (partner) needed to change our lives. Today we both do not work and try to travel as much as possible and spend all our time together. I remember thinking for such a long time that my life was over, I didnt realise it had just begun. I live in UK and was treated at the first cancer hospital in the world, the Royal Marsden, they ROCK!!!!! I just noticed Sarah your in the UK. My email is tricia_halcyon if you would like to contact me. I wish you loads luck, have you seen a specialist yet? Cos you know it could be none of the above. Tricia0 -
Symtoms of SCC for meSarah Sq said:Hi Jennifer
I've just had
Hi Jennifer
I've just had mri for mass on nasal septum I have constant discomfort in my right hand side of my face and alot of headaches which are getting worse and discomfort in my ears and upper neck. I'm also very tired much of the time after being really fit, what symptoms did you have and how quickly were things diagnosed?
Sarah uk
Well, lets see- I was living in NYC during the WTC chaos- I then packed up and moved to sunny Scunny where I worked in a chicken hatchery, a restaurant, a chocolate factory, and.. A FURNITURE FACTORY. I lived near the Corus steel works. I smoked, drank, and had a hell of a good time in the 80's. (NYC) I thought I was Ok until November of 2008. (We moved back Stateside) Everyone at work was getting flu shots. I never had one and was kinda talked into it by fellow co-workers at the DIY store I work at. Left shoulder- shot right into my beautiful blue moon tattoo for my manchester lads. After that I started getting like cold symtoms. So I started nasal sprays. Worked for awhile. I had headaches too- but because I work in retail I thought it was just par for the course. Aspirin knocked them out. It wasn't until about Jan./Feb. that hubby noticed I was snoring-and the snoring was really wet sounding (dont mean to be disgusting-but its true) Then it was off to drs who kept giving me prednisone and antibotics that would work for awhile but once I was off of them the cold like symtoms would come back worse than ever. March saw the beginning of severe nose bleeds-from the left nostril.Hemmoraging to be exact. I was having 4 to 6 nosebleeds a day for 2 weeks but with each nose bleed I thought I was breathing better so didnt worry too much until 1 day at work I had a bad one and a coworker decided to take me to the hospital where my nose was cauterized and then I had to go to a ENT who didnt know what he was looking at-a CT scan later showed a mass and when I saw it (though the tech said I wouldnt understand it) I knew what it was but not what it was called. (I cried- I still do some days) Then it was on to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore where i did two treatments of chemo called 5FU which shrunk my tumor by 75 percent. Note that my tumor has eaten though bone and was/is? pressing on my left eye socket and my brain. I could not stay on 5FU because of the dehydration level. Now I am in Baltimore for 35 radiation treatments and chemo 'light' (regular chemo)So far I can breathe but I can not smell. Taste is off for me. Though I still can taste chocolate so I'm blessed.Though now with the radiation doctors are worried what I will look like in 5 years- I dont really care that much- I've always been vain- now with my hairloss I cant be- all I want now is another 10 years or so to enjoy my life/husband/friends/family. The thing that really is scaring me now is what the doctor has told me about my eyesight and my brain with this radiation is that there is a 5-10 percent chance of brain damage and or vision loss. But ce le vie! I WILL LIVE. Thats how I have to think. I hope I answered your question and will write again soon-
CITY TIL I DIE
Jennifer0 -
hi jenniferJennifer48 said:Symtoms of SCC for me
Well, lets see- I was living in NYC during the WTC chaos- I then packed up and moved to sunny Scunny where I worked in a chicken hatchery, a restaurant, a chocolate factory, and.. A FURNITURE FACTORY. I lived near the Corus steel works. I smoked, drank, and had a hell of a good time in the 80's. (NYC) I thought I was Ok until November of 2008. (We moved back Stateside) Everyone at work was getting flu shots. I never had one and was kinda talked into it by fellow co-workers at the DIY store I work at. Left shoulder- shot right into my beautiful blue moon tattoo for my manchester lads. After that I started getting like cold symtoms. So I started nasal sprays. Worked for awhile. I had headaches too- but because I work in retail I thought it was just par for the course. Aspirin knocked them out. It wasn't until about Jan./Feb. that hubby noticed I was snoring-and the snoring was really wet sounding (dont mean to be disgusting-but its true) Then it was off to drs who kept giving me prednisone and antibotics that would work for awhile but once I was off of them the cold like symtoms would come back worse than ever. March saw the beginning of severe nose bleeds-from the left nostril.Hemmoraging to be exact. I was having 4 to 6 nosebleeds a day for 2 weeks but with each nose bleed I thought I was breathing better so didnt worry too much until 1 day at work I had a bad one and a coworker decided to take me to the hospital where my nose was cauterized and then I had to go to a ENT who didnt know what he was looking at-a CT scan later showed a mass and when I saw it (though the tech said I wouldnt understand it) I knew what it was but not what it was called. (I cried- I still do some days) Then it was on to Johns Hopkins in Baltimore where i did two treatments of chemo called 5FU which shrunk my tumor by 75 percent. Note that my tumor has eaten though bone and was/is? pressing on my left eye socket and my brain. I could not stay on 5FU because of the dehydration level. Now I am in Baltimore for 35 radiation treatments and chemo 'light' (regular chemo)So far I can breathe but I can not smell. Taste is off for me. Though I still can taste chocolate so I'm blessed.Though now with the radiation doctors are worried what I will look like in 5 years- I dont really care that much- I've always been vain- now with my hairloss I cant be- all I want now is another 10 years or so to enjoy my life/husband/friends/family. The thing that really is scaring me now is what the doctor has told me about my eyesight and my brain with this radiation is that there is a 5-10 percent chance of brain damage and or vision loss. But ce le vie! I WILL LIVE. Thats how I have to think. I hope I answered your question and will write again soon-
CITY TIL I DIE
Jennifer
I just wanted to say I wish you luck with your treatments and a successful recovery. I lost smell and taste but can taste chocolate soooooooooooo well and hot and spicy too, so I am very lucky.
Bye for now Tricia0 -
Tricias photo and other itemsTricia02 said:hi jennifer
I just wanted to say I wish you luck with your treatments and a successful recovery. I lost smell and taste but can taste chocolate soooooooooooo well and hot and spicy too, so I am very lucky.
Bye for now Tricia
Is the photo recent? If so you dont looke bad at all. I'm having a rough week with depression. How do you or did you cope with bad feelings?
Jennifer0 -
hiyaJennifer48 said:Tricias photo and other items
Is the photo recent? If so you dont looke bad at all. I'm having a rough week with depression. How do you or did you cope with bad feelings?
Jennifer
Jennifer, the main photo is 5 years old before diagnosis, all the rest are post treatment, mainly this year in fact. I look sort of fine when I wear glasses, but without glasses my nose looks a bit squishy, crooked and flattish. A year after treatment I was still feeling quite down and depressed and went to see a cognitive behavourial therapist, which helped somewhat, but the chat room on this site helped me more at the time. I started taking diazapam for about 6 months and that also helped me out of the duldrums. I guess its a necessary part of recovery to feel down and depressed, but it does subside and eventually disappears altogether. Today I have a full and happy life. And I can honestly remember thinking I would never ever get "me" back. I didn't get the old me back, I got a new me and I have no complaints. I feel less freaked out now about life and my demise, which will happen one day, that's for sure lol. I am also a recovering alcoholic with 20+ years sobriety. I therefore have my 24 hour programme which has also been of enormous benefit to me. All in all I am a lucky person I believe. I remember you saying you are vain, I was too and am so much less so now, though I do still enjoy looking as good as I can, without being fixated on my looks. I was going to have a facelift just when I was diagnosed, now I can't be bothered lol. Anyway Jennifer I hope chemo is going ok for you and that it shrinks that tumour to a tiny size so they can remove it without too much facial damage. Bye for now Txxx0
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