The verdict is in
He also wants me to get genetic testing done, my mom had breast cancer with recurrence and was under 50. Don't know how to feel about that. I have been sitting here thinking why was this not discussed before hand. If I have the gene would it have been better to get a bilateral mastectomy done with ovaries removed all at once instead of doing it later? Not quite sure how to feel about that. I'm a little pissed off about it and really scared to death at the same time. My sister is going to have here yearly thing done in a couple weeks and she thinks that she is going to get the testing done as well.
I know that I should believe in my heart of hearts that everything will be okay. But I am scared to death! Toxins in my body, cancer, all of this is I want to crawl in a whole and never come out. I want to run down the street screaming WHY ME WHY ME!!!!! I thought that hearing that I had cancer was mind boogling enough, now all this. How do I get out of bed ever day and go on. Okay enough of the blah blah blah. Put your big girl panties on and deal with it!!!! God brought me to it, he will bring me through it. God, I just hope and sometimes you will carry me, I dont know if I can stand alone.
Sherry
Comments
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GENETIC TESTING
Hi Sherry,
My mom had bc twice along with other cancers, my sister had it twice also. My sister had the genetic testing and of course it was positive. My onco also suggested I have it done so I asked him why at this point it seems to be a mute point. He said it was more for my info. than anything else to help me decide if I would want further surgeries. Eventually I had a total hysterectomy and one breast removed that became cancerous after the other one had had a lumpectomy. Personally I choose not to have it done, for me it seemed like it was a mute point.
I am glad you have a treatment plan set up and that the ball is rolling, it will be over before you know it and we will be here for you every step of the way. Sending a multitude of cyber hugs your way!
RE0 -
Sherry,
I wish I knew what
Sherry,
I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better. It is normal to be scared I think several of us here have been there, maybe all of us unfortunately.
I was not given any percentage rates for anything, not sure if I want them either. I wouldn't stress too much about the testing. From what I understand the test is the BRAC test. BC runs in my family but my mom's test was negative. My Grandmother, mother, and Great Aunt all had it and now me. My doc says it is obviously hereditary.
I am also scared of reoccurance an wish I knew how to not think about it. I am considering a hysterectomy also but am trying to take it one step at a time. I will see a high risk doc sometime after radiation I think. It is too much all at once.
Emend is a wonderful drug. I did not get it my first treatment but did with the last 3 and it made a big difference. I am glad you decide to do the chemo. It is scary at first but for me going there was ok. I met a lot of nice supprotive people. Kind of like this place but face to face. It goes by before you know it.
Try not to second guess yourself. You made the best choice for you at the time with info you had. Just move forward.
I know what you mean about having toxins in your body. Just remember they are killing the cancer and you need that right now. You already have one big step behind you. You can get through the next!
Someone told me that saying about God recently and I say it to myself often. Remember you are not alone and you are entitiled to feeling like going on about the "blah blah blah" sometimes. Let it out so you can have some good times too.
Hope you are feeling better soon, sending positive thoughts your way,
Kim0 -
Sherry.......
Sherry sweetie, it will be ok. It all sounds like so much now, but it will go by and be over before you know it.
I now can "forget" about the cancer for periods of time. Of course though, there are times when it will hit me out of the blue and I swear I almost drop to my knees when I think of it. But for the most part, I just try to live.
As far as genetic testing, my daughter's ob/gyn is pushing for me to be tested, because it would make it easier to keep a closer check on my daughter (mammograms & MRI).
But I feel that any genetic testing for me would be kind of silly. Going back 3 generations on both sides of my family, there is no history of ANY breast cancer. I am the trendsetter, apparently. So what would be the point of seeing if I carry the gene? If I do, where would it have come from?
I don't know. I guess it has to start somewhere....
Like RE, I'm sending you big cyber hugs.
CR0 -
Dear Sherry...
This type of information is extremely overwhelming, for all of us who receive it - how could it possibly not be?
If it makes you feel any better at all - following surgery, my own risk of recurrence rates were almost exactly like yours, and that was almost now six years ago. My med onc continues to tell me I'm doing very well, while he watches me closely still.
Although it's totally understandable that your treatment plan is frightening - it IS doable. Many here have endured similar - and we will be here to support and encourage you throughout. You are most certainly not alone.
Best wishes.
Kind regards, Susan0 -
Sherry-we have all been...
where you are today. At times, as others have said, it "brings you to your knees" even when you are years out from your dx. We all have asked, "Why me?" I still do. Sometimes, I just break down and cry (and now I cannot blame it on the meds since I recently stopped, but that's another story). Now, I cry for my daughter. She's 21 (she was only 18 when I was dx) and just yesterday she told me that sometimes she is so scared that it will happen it her. "I enjoy being a woman," she said, "and it scares me that I may get can**r and have to go surgery like you did." Then she cried and my heart broke for her, because I brought this saddest upon her by no fault of my own and it's a fear that I cannot take away. As a mother, I am not use to not being able to fix things--I have always fixed things for her.
Recently my daughter told me, after she attended a can**r celebration with me, that she had a nightmare about getting it and that it was so real-she woke up trembling. I heard her say, "Oh, thank God that was only a dream." At the time, she would not explain it to me.
I guess what I am trying to say, Sherry, is that the fear we have at the time of our dx, never really goes away. In fact, the fear often goes beyond ourselves and affects those we love. We cannot make it go away for us or for anyone else. It's okay to be afraid, that is part of what gives us the strength and to become survivors, but we cannot let it control us.
My mother, when I was just a child, told me that God never gives us more than we can handle. Since that time, she has told me this on numerous ocasssions. I have also questioned her words and thought that God must think I am stronger than I really am, if this is true. I suppose that's why I let Him carry me when I don't feel so strong.
We all have fought, we all continue to fight. But remember, the way we decide to carry on the fight is up to each of us and no one can decide it for us. I decided to have chemo and rads so I could be there for my daughter and hopefully see her graduate from college (she will graduate in another 1 and 1/2 to 2 years). I hope to be around when she marries and when she has her own children to hold (and for me to spoil
). I don't know how many more years I will be here, no one knows-not the drs, not the stats, not the specialists,...but I know my prognosis, because I asked. According to the stats, I was given a 70% of not being alive when my daughter is 30 years-old. I was angry and scared when I was told this, but I asked because I wanted to know. I needed to know. I needed to plan and provide for my daughter when I am not here. She doesn't know, because she has her own life to live.
Sherry, don't be afraid of the fear...if it gets you out of bed and makes you continue the fight, then it is a good kind of fear. Churchill once said, "The only thing to fear is fear itself." For us, the can**r survivor, the only thing to fear is giving in to the disease and letting it rule your life.
dmc0 -
Sherry, I can see where itCR1954 said:Sherry.......
Sherry sweetie, it will be ok. It all sounds like so much now, but it will go by and be over before you know it.
I now can "forget" about the cancer for periods of time. Of course though, there are times when it will hit me out of the blue and I swear I almost drop to my knees when I think of it. But for the most part, I just try to live.
As far as genetic testing, my daughter's ob/gyn is pushing for me to be tested, because it would make it easier to keep a closer check on my daughter (mammograms & MRI).
But I feel that any genetic testing for me would be kind of silly. Going back 3 generations on both sides of my family, there is no history of ANY breast cancer. I am the trendsetter, apparently. So what would be the point of seeing if I carry the gene? If I do, where would it have come from?
I don't know. I guess it has to start somewhere....
Like RE, I'm sending you big cyber hugs.
CR
Sherry, I can see where it sounds overwhelming to you, but, you will get thru it. Just breathe and try to just take it one step at a time. It will go by quickly for you.
Hugs to you, Noel0 -
Good to see you post as to
Good to see you post as to what you found out Sherry. Sorry that it has upset you. It is mind boggling. Just know that we will help you thru it.0 -
Sherry....
I say this to myself 10x's a day.....The Will of God will never take me where The Grace of God will not protect me! He will come to you in your weakest moments if you ask him! I know this because He said He would! Deep down we all know there are great things planned for our lives.....Upfront we don't know what it is which is very frustrating. Hang in there, breath deep, and know that where there is a beginning there will also be an ending!! I think you'll make it through to the end. Pammy
PS) I am getting the Bracca Gene test done on the 7th mainly for my daughters sake (she is 25 and already has had a biopsy - benign) and to see if I should consider removing my ovaries (had hestorectomy 4 years ago but left ovaries in for hormones - look what it got me...go figure!!).0 -
Hey Sherry, I start ChemoAkiss4me said:Sherry....
I say this to myself 10x's a day.....The Will of God will never take me where The Grace of God will not protect me! He will come to you in your weakest moments if you ask him! I know this because He said He would! Deep down we all know there are great things planned for our lives.....Upfront we don't know what it is which is very frustrating. Hang in there, breath deep, and know that where there is a beginning there will also be an ending!! I think you'll make it through to the end. Pammy
PS) I am getting the Bracca Gene test done on the 7th mainly for my daughters sake (she is 25 and already has had a biopsy - benign) and to see if I should consider removing my ovaries (had hestorectomy 4 years ago but left ovaries in for hormones - look what it got me...go figure!!).
Hey Sherry, I start Chemo July 8th, port was put in last Friday. I know what your feeling. I also have the Emend. I read on the package to take the day off and then next 2 days. I thought I was told by onc to take day before, then day of and then day after. Is this how it works?0 -
I thinkKat11 said:Hey Sherry, I start Chemo
Hey Sherry, I start Chemo July 8th, port was put in last Friday. I know what your feeling. I also have the Emend. I read on the package to take the day off and then next 2 days. I thought I was told by onc to take day before, then day of and then day after. Is this how it works?
I think that was what they had told me. To take it the day before the day of and the day after. I haven't went and got the script yet, but I will let you as soon as I get it.0 -
Sherry
just wanted to let you know we are all here for you. Sometimes it does get very overwhelming, but you will do what needs to be done. Choices regarding the genetic testing can wait. Big girl panties not necessary, just vent and let us now how it goes.
=^..^=0 -
It may be prescribedcats_toy said:Sherry
just wanted to let you know we are all here for you. Sometimes it does get very overwhelming, but you will do what needs to be done. Choices regarding the genetic testing can wait. Big girl panties not necessary, just vent and let us now how it goes.
=^..^=
It may be prescribed different by different docs but I took Emend the day of and then for two days after. It was helpful. I did not have it the first time. It made a difference to me.
Good luck
KIm0 -
Kim, Thats what the scriptconfused123 said:It may be prescribed
It may be prescribed different by different docs but I took Emend the day of and then for two days after. It was helpful. I did not have it the first time. It made a difference to me.
Good luck
KIm
Kim, Thats what the script reads, but I thought the doctor said day before, and so on. Well, I guess its another call to the doctor. Thanks0 -
Hi Sherry,
I had the
Hi Sherry,
I had the genetic testing. Three of my father's sisters died of bc and my dad died of prostate cancer. I tested positive for the BCRA2 gene. It was shocking but I am glad that I have the knownledge. My aunts and my dad were to afraid to treat their disease. I'm 38 years old. I have had 6 months of chemo, a bilateral masectomy, and hormone therapy. I'm going to fight.
I understand about the ovary thing. I'm not quite there. I am weighing the quality of life issues.
My motto is
In life there will be pain but we choose to suffer.0 -
I love what you wrote Pammy!Akiss4me said:Sherry....
I say this to myself 10x's a day.....The Will of God will never take me where The Grace of God will not protect me! He will come to you in your weakest moments if you ask him! I know this because He said He would! Deep down we all know there are great things planned for our lives.....Upfront we don't know what it is which is very frustrating. Hang in there, breath deep, and know that where there is a beginning there will also be an ending!! I think you'll make it through to the end. Pammy
PS) I am getting the Bracca Gene test done on the 7th mainly for my daughters sake (she is 25 and already has had a biopsy - benign) and to see if I should consider removing my ovaries (had hestorectomy 4 years ago but left ovaries in for hormones - look what it got me...go figure!!).
I love what you wrote Pammy! Thanks for writing that!
Sherry, you hang in there like they said! Wishing you the best!0
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