Tired of it all so soon!!

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Comments

  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
    #22
    Hi Pammy!
    Just remember that you have been thru a lot, mentally and physically. Just hearing the words breast cancer takes a toll on you. We have all been there and some still are. I was so busy with friends and family during my treatment, that I didn't have a lot of time to just do nothing. But, when I did have some alone time, I made sure that I still was busy. I didn't allow myself to sit around and think bad thoughts. I surround myself with good things and I keep busy doing something, anything. And, when my hubby is home, I have to think good stuff, cuz, he is GOOD STUFF! lol

    Maybe you should talk to your doctor about this. Maybe you need to seek more professional help. Or, maybe it is as simple as just doing something. I wish you the best Pammy. Take care of yourself! Jeanne
  • bfbear
    bfbear Member Posts: 380
    #23
    Akiss4me said:

    Thanks Debi....
    Thank you soooo much for the tip on supplies. I have the sites written down. I always felt so relaxed when I use to watch "The Happy Painter". I don't know if you are familiar with him, but I loved his nature paintings. What is collage? It sounds interesting. :) Pammy

    Collage
    Collage is using a variety of materials together to make a work of art. In my work I generally use acrylic paint, differnt types of paper, letters cut from magazines, beads, fibers, and found objects.

    If I get a chance later today, I'll post some of my stuff on my expressions page. My art generally includes words, quotes, or thoughts of mine....but sometimes not!

    I can't wait to see what you start doing.

    Love ya,
    Debi
  • tgf
    tgf Member Posts: 950 Member
    #24
    Jeanne D said:

    Hi Pammy!
    Just remember that you have been thru a lot, mentally and physically. Just hearing the words breast cancer takes a toll on you. We have all been there and some still are. I was so busy with friends and family during my treatment, that I didn't have a lot of time to just do nothing. But, when I did have some alone time, I made sure that I still was busy. I didn't allow myself to sit around and think bad thoughts. I surround myself with good things and I keep busy doing something, anything. And, when my hubby is home, I have to think good stuff, cuz, he is GOOD STUFF! lol

    Maybe you should talk to your doctor about this. Maybe you need to seek more professional help. Or, maybe it is as simple as just doing something. I wish you the best Pammy. Take care of yourself! Jeanne

    Baby steps
    Try not to look at the whole picture or too far down the road. It will overwhelm you and take too much of your time and energy. Instead ... just focuse on little baby steps. One little step at a time ... and each step will move you forward.

    hugs.
    teena
  • TrishyG
    TrishyG Member Posts: 40
    #25
    tgf said:

    Baby steps
    Try not to look at the whole picture or too far down the road. It will overwhelm you and take too much of your time and energy. Instead ... just focuse on little baby steps. One little step at a time ... and each step will move you forward.

    hugs.
    teena

    journey
    I have found breast cancer to be like a novel. It's like a mini saga with many plot twist, characters, and subject changes. There are so many decisions to make. I'm still making them. (I have to decide what size breast implants I want). It's crazy!! The waiting is sometimes unbearable.

    This is the time to be true to yourself. Pursue your dreams if you can. Find your passion. I have always found in life that things work themselves out. I think when we try to control every minute and every element in the way we think things should be, we are the least content.

    Hugs

    Trish
  • tjhay
    tjhay Member Posts: 655
    #26
    Being a Bum
    Pammy
    You are in a 2 week cycle, and yes it does feel like it is constantly repeating its self. It is all part of the journey that you are on. As far as taking a leave from work, I am sure that your family would prefer that you take this time to take care of yourself the best that you can so that you are in prime fighting condition. I to stopped working, and I felt like a total bum, heck I still feel like a total bum, but it is okay. Being a bum can be fun at times. Do little things that make you feel like you have accomplished stuff and you wont feel so lazy.
    Happy Smiles
    Tjahy
  • sausageroll
    sausageroll Member Posts: 415
    #27
    tjhay said:

    Being a Bum
    Pammy
    You are in a 2 week cycle, and yes it does feel like it is constantly repeating its self. It is all part of the journey that you are on. As far as taking a leave from work, I am sure that your family would prefer that you take this time to take care of yourself the best that you can so that you are in prime fighting condition. I to stopped working, and I felt like a total bum, heck I still feel like a total bum, but it is okay. Being a bum can be fun at times. Do little things that make you feel like you have accomplished stuff and you wont feel so lazy.
    Happy Smiles
    Tjahy

    Welcome to the club Pammy!
    I think all of us feel somewhat depressed at times...bc and the treatments take a lot out of your body.

    Don't look too far ahead..just take one day at a time.

    I talked to my radiation oncologist this week and told him that I am never depressed and am not afarid of the cancer or any of the treatments, but that I was crying at the drop of a hat. He said he might be sending me to a doctor if I did not feel like that!!!!

    I found one of the things that really got me down was the house. I like to have it looking nice, but just don't have the energy to do it...so I have decided to let it ride for awhile and take that nap when I feel like it.

    Thinking of you and hope you feel more at ease soon. Pat
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
    #28
    The waiting game
    Pammy, of course you are sick of it! I found myself exhausted after only a few weeks and I hadn't started treatment yet either. Think about what's been packed into those weeks: diagnosis, tests, endless doctor's appointments, mind-boggling decisions, fear like you never knew it. It would be exhausting after one day! BUT, as the ladies have said, the next phase will be easier. Treatment puts you on another cycle, but one that is more regular and less filled with anxiety and unpleasant surprises. You are a bit more accustomed to your diangosis and are on a schedule to beat the disease. You do get used to it pretty fast, even if you don't like it (and who would?!).

    Everyone has already given you great advice, but I want to second the ideas of rewarding yourself and letting yourself pursue dreams that you thought you didn't have time for before. I did this and it worked like a charm. I planned a vacation for after chemo; I joined a fancy gym and got a trainer; I got regular pedicures and started going to the theater more often. It all helped me to feel part of life again and less stuck in my own nightmare. This doesn't work overnight because you are still very scared and have a right to be. But slowly and step by step you will return to the land of the living, perhaps even filled with greater joy than before.

    As an aside, I got through treatment with Lexipro and Xanax, so don't be afraid to ask for something. I know you will do great!

    Mimi
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    #29
    bfbear said:

    Collage
    Collage is using a variety of materials together to make a work of art. In my work I generally use acrylic paint, differnt types of paper, letters cut from magazines, beads, fibers, and found objects.

    If I get a chance later today, I'll post some of my stuff on my expressions page. My art generally includes words, quotes, or thoughts of mine....but sometimes not!

    I can't wait to see what you start doing.

    Love ya,
    Debi

    Debi....
    Thank you. I would love to see some of your collages. It sounds like so much fun! Maybe I would like doing that better? :) Pammy
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    #30
    Akiss4me said:

    awwwww.....
    You gals are the greatest!! Everyone has such a way of lifting my spirits in such a short time. Thank you all so much! Just knowing that these feelings don't belong exclusively to me makes me feel better (you know how I like to share!). And I got called "cute".....what a mood lifter!!
    I love all of your suggestions about rewarding myself. I never thought of this. What a great idea! I guess I always thought rewards had to be big things to be considered a reward.
    I was thinking that I may try my hand at painting. I really don't have a hobby other than decorating (which is not affordable for the time being). My children think I am incredably artistic and should give it a try. They are even willing to auction it off on e-bay thinking I may have enough talent to do something from home (I secretly think they are going to bid on it themselves!). All I need to do is find out what you need to paint. Anyone in here an artist? Lots of hugs!!! :) Pammy

    Writing
    Pammy, I think Cindy (CR) has a great suggestion for you: writing. You did writing amusingly of your earlier experiences and seemed to enjoy writing. Keeping a journal is one idea. Or, just keep writing that memoir, as Cindy suggested. Fiction works, too.

    Also, not to be a downer, but you might want to do any big tasks that require lots of energy. If you get radiation, you will become more fatigued, they tell me. So any household or other projects you've wanted to do would also occupy your time and thoughts.

    Finally, as everyone has said, you are at the worst part--the waiting. It will get better as you get all the information you need to move forward. Please hang in there. And let us know if you have a spa day. Never had one myself and am curious!
  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
    #31
    You know, Pammy....
    You might want to consider taking up writing! You certainly kept me anticipating the next "chapter" in your Pammy adventures! You have talent!

    CR
  • The1percen
    The1percen Member Posts: 135
    #32
    CR1954 said:

    You know, Pammy....
    You might want to consider taking up writing! You certainly kept me anticipating the next "chapter" in your Pammy adventures! You have talent!

    CR

    I 2nd CR's post
    Pammy,,
    I have to agree with CR. You are an awesome writer and that is a good stress reliever too, so go at it, more adventures PLEASE!!!!
    Take Care,
    Mike
  • bfbear
    bfbear Member Posts: 380
    #33
    The1percen said:

    I 2nd CR's post
    Pammy,,
    I have to agree with CR. You are an awesome writer and that is a good stress reliever too, so go at it, more adventures PLEASE!!!!
    Take Care,
    Mike

    Hey Pammy...
    Hi Pammy,

    Check out my Expressions page. I put some pictures of some of my collages there for you to peruse.

    Hope you're brighter today. I know you're tough and can handle whatever comes your way. Some day are just better than others. And staying busy is really good preventative medicine.

    Hugs,
    Debi
  • tommaseena
    tommaseena Member Posts: 1,769
    #34
    bfbear said:

    Hey Pammy...
    Hi Pammy,

    Check out my Expressions page. I put some pictures of some of my collages there for you to peruse.

    Hope you're brighter today. I know you're tough and can handle whatever comes your way. Some day are just better than others. And staying busy is really good preventative medicine.

    Hugs,
    Debi

    Just beautiful
    Debi,
    Your work is beautiful. You have talent.

    Thanks,
    Margo
  • MAJW
    MAJW Member Posts: 2,510 Member
    #35
    Akiss4me said:

    awwwww.....
    You gals are the greatest!! Everyone has such a way of lifting my spirits in such a short time. Thank you all so much! Just knowing that these feelings don't belong exclusively to me makes me feel better (you know how I like to share!). And I got called "cute".....what a mood lifter!!
    I love all of your suggestions about rewarding myself. I never thought of this. What a great idea! I guess I always thought rewards had to be big things to be considered a reward.
    I was thinking that I may try my hand at painting. I really don't have a hobby other than decorating (which is not affordable for the time being). My children think I am incredably artistic and should give it a try. They are even willing to auction it off on e-bay thinking I may have enough talent to do something from home (I secretly think they are going to bid on it themselves!). All I need to do is find out what you need to paint. Anyone in here an artist? Lots of hugs!!! :) Pammy

    GET ARTISTIC!!!!
    PAMMY............GO FOR IT! I paint and have for quite a number of years......It is a WONDERFUL, FANTASTIC way to expess yourself! There is no "right or wrong" way to paint.......it's TOTALLY YOURS! I do water colors, oils and some acrylics.....I would suggest starting with a small set that you can buy at a craft store....Barnes and Nobles have wonderful "little starter" sets, usually with instructions, offered in oils and water colors..Watercolors are more difficult but oils require a turpentine clean up......you don't want to mess with that......I use WATER BASED oils......no odor and soap and water clean up......these can be bought at Michael's or any craft store.....brand that I use is Winsor & Newton Artisan waster mixable oil colour....You can buy a couple canvas and HAVE AT IT! REMEMBER......it's YOUR expression....no right or wrong!

    Keep me posted........
    Nancy
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #36
    CR1954 said:

    Pammy.......
    I DO remember the Happy Painter! LOL!

    I used to paint years ago. I used mostly acrylics because of the easy clean up, and they were quick drying. I sometimes used oils though, and oil pastels....kind of like a chalk stick, but made of oils.
    You can buy painting canvas already on a heavy cardboard...they come in all different sizes.

    You can also get painting "kits" that come with everything you need as far as paints & brushes. Then you only need to get canvas or whatever you want to paint on.

    Whatever you do, HAVE FUN WITH IT!! I used to sit down to paint and hours would pass and I didn't even realize!

    I'll be watching for your work on ebay!

    CR

    Was the happy painter the
    Was the happy painter the fellow that would give a whistle while we was painting? If so, I know him too. My daughter, and several of her friends had a paint party and we got acrylic paints, canvas etc. They imitated him painting a cabin the the woods. They actually did a very nice good for untrained first attempts. It was fun for them. Then they did abstracts and other paintings. Everyone went home with one canvas of their choice. It was a lot of fun for all. Painting is a great way to express yourself. I see someone mentioned collages. They are lots of fun also. You can even get a paint by number and then paint it however you want.
    Stef
  • bfbear
    bfbear Member Posts: 380
    #37
    tommaseena said:

    Just beautiful
    Debi,
    Your work is beautiful. You have talent.

    Thanks,
    Margo

    Thanks Margo!!!
    I appreciate the feedback! (Especially since it's positive!)

    With gratitude,
    Debi
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #38
    bfbear said:

    Hey Pammy...
    Hi Pammy,

    Check out my Expressions page. I put some pictures of some of my collages there for you to peruse.

    Hope you're brighter today. I know you're tough and can handle whatever comes your way. Some day are just better than others. And staying busy is really good preventative medicine.

    Hugs,
    Debi

    Debi, I love your artwork!
    Debi, I love your artwork! You are very talented!

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