Family In Need Of Some answers Or Advice

djman
djman Member Posts: 2
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Hello,My Grandfather who is 78 years old,was diagnosed with colon cancer in December of 08.We were totally shocked.Because there were not many signs,or he didnt tell us.The doctors say its at stage four,and it is very aggressive,and has spread to his liver.He has been taking chemo now since January,and with the recent pet-scans,it shows that it is not doing much good.He has another on the 27th,in which they are thinking about stopping the chemo.My family and I really dont know what to do at this point,the doctors answers are very much to the point of there is nothing else they can do.Up until December of last year,he seemed in perfect health,so it is very sad to see this happening to him.I take care of him on a daily basis.And recently his balance has gotten so bad,he cant stand without falling.So I basically have to walk behind him to make sure he doesnt fall.He has no pain,but is very,very weak.He was always the type of person,to be the first up in the morning,now he lay in the bed until atleast 11:30 in the morning,and goes back to sleep about 2pm.I am trying to be the strong one in the family,because everyone else,is to emotional at this point.So any help,or advice I would greatly appreciate it,because we dont know really what to do at this point,especially if they stop the chemo.

Thank You Very Much
Much Blessings 2 All

Comments

  • PamPam2
    PamPam2 Member Posts: 370 Member
    #2
    djman
    I'm sorry your dad and you and family are going through this. I did not have spread to liver, but you will be hearing from many here who have, and are being treated aggressively and making it. I know there are several different types of chemo that can be tried if another is not working, or making you too sick or weak. You didn't say if they did any surgery on your dad. I don't know if he is being treated at a major cancer center, by a team of specialists, from what I have learned here, that is one of the most important things to fight and live with this disease.The extreme fatigue sounds like chemo fatigue. You have to be very pro-active with your health care, especially when stage 4 and older, some doctors will give up, where there are other doctors who will not, there are several methods of treating/getting rid of liver mets out there. I hope some of those who are dealing with liver mets get to you soon, they can tell you more than I. Best hopes for your dad and you.
    Pam
  • Shayenne
    Shayenne Member Posts: 2,342
    #3
    PamPam2 said:

    djman
    I'm sorry your dad and you and family are going through this. I did not have spread to liver, but you will be hearing from many here who have, and are being treated aggressively and making it. I know there are several different types of chemo that can be tried if another is not working, or making you too sick or weak. You didn't say if they did any surgery on your dad. I don't know if he is being treated at a major cancer center, by a team of specialists, from what I have learned here, that is one of the most important things to fight and live with this disease.The extreme fatigue sounds like chemo fatigue. You have to be very pro-active with your health care, especially when stage 4 and older, some doctors will give up, where there are other doctors who will not, there are several methods of treating/getting rid of liver mets out there. I hope some of those who are dealing with liver mets get to you soon, they can tell you more than I. Best hopes for your dad and you.
    Pam

    Other options!
    If this chemo isn't working so far, since December, I would be wanting to try another one, there are all sorts of different cocktails out there, and he needs to go to someone who will be more agressive then give up on him..I am at Stage 4 cc with a tumor in my liver, and have had 4 chemo treatments so far, and the doctor told me from my first scan, that it's working, the chemo has killed most of my cancer...I know how tiring chemo is, it will knock me down for a loop.. I go and get my chemo on a Wednesday, go home with a pump connected to me, it comes off on Fridays, and then once I'm unhooked, for the next 4 days, I am tired and weak as well, but I do bounce back to myself on the 4th day, it does make one very tired, let him just rest it out, he will bounce back after a few days after it, but I know that tired and weak feeling, I go through it as well.

    Hope he goes and gets another opinion or goes to someone who will not give up on him~

    Hugssss!
    ~Donna
  • tiny one
    tiny one Member Posts: 465 Member
    #4
    Please seek another opinion
    Please seek another opinion for your Grandfather. Sometimes one Doctor will say there is no hope but another Doctor will give different options and those will work. Saying prayers. Sounds like chemo has been hard on him, it can really cause some terrible fatique. Please don't give up.
  • kimby
    kimby Member Posts: 797
    #5
    DJ,
    I'm sorry your family is
    DJ,

    I'm sorry your family is dealing with this. I know how scary it is. I'm stage IV cc with mets to the liver and celiac lymph nodes. I was 43 at diagnosis with no symptoms either.

    It doesn't sound like your dad is tolerating chemo well at all. What do the oncologists say? There are things they can do to make this smoother. Report all side effects and ask for solutions.

    The sleeping sounds like a combination of chemo induced fatigue/general illness and more emotional issues. There is so much for your dad to deal with emotionally. You need to remember that in his lifetime, canzer itself was a death sentence. Any type, any stage. He must be terrified. Will he see a counselor? There are things going on in his head that he can't share with anyone he loves or that loves him. It is too dark and scary.

    Also, he's 78. Is he old? My dad died in June at the age of 65 and he was very, very old by then. My 85 year old grandmother just planted flowers in front of the house that she cleans everyday, and where she hung wallpaper (by herself) in the bathroom. She is still young enough to pursue chemo and other treatments if the need arises. Don't let the doctors give up on him because of his age. He (and you) will be able to judge that aspect in a better way, because you know him and they don't. Age discrimination does exist in the medical field, too. Doctors are human, not perfect.

    If your dad is not ready to accept that there is nothing else to do, get him a second opinion...or third, or fourth. You've already heard the worst so what do you have to lose? There are different chemo’s out there. My disease is chemo resistant, meaning it progressed on standard cocktails. My onc team worked together to come up with an unusual combo that is working much better for me as well as a liver radiation therapy that along with the chemo has me currently with the status of 'No Evidence of Active Disease". It can be done but we've been working on this for 22 mos.

    I hope this answers some questions. I'm sorry I don't have any good answers for you.

    Kimby
  • PamPam2
    PamPam2 Member Posts: 370 Member
    #6
    bump
    Hello.
    I am bumping your post back up to the top so you will get more replys. Has anything new happened? Have you started looking at other options, second opinions or a major cancer center? How is your dad feeling? Hope he is feeling a little better.
    PAm
  • djman
    djman Member Posts: 2
    #7
    PamPam2 said:

    bump
    Hello.
    I am bumping your post back up to the top so you will get more replys. Has anything new happened? Have you started looking at other options, second opinions or a major cancer center? How is your dad feeling? Hope he is feeling a little better.
    PAm

    Family In Need Of Help or Advice
    First all I want to thank all of you,Pam,Shayenne,Tiny One,Kimby.I read all of your posts,and I have took a little advice from each one,Thanks so much,and you guys just gave me so much more hope.He currently is at a Cancer Facility,where he is getting chemo.He actually had his Chemo today,and they will be taking the pump off Thursday,we are to meet with his doctor on Thurday,to discuss further,which direction we should go.He has a scan scheduled for Friday.I have been talking with my family about getting a second opinion,or a Major Cancer Center,such as Cancer Centers Of America.His doctors havent brought up surgery at this point.But I do know that he has been taking chemo for quite some time now,and it is not working,so something else has got to be done.He is losing weight,alot of weight,because he is not been having a appetite.I try to get him to eat small portions,througout the day,to try to keep his weight up.He has lost 30 pounds in less than three months,and his blood count is slowly going down(8.2),which they are thinking of giving him more blood.He is a fighter,and he is trying to fight this,although he is very emotional at times,because he is not the type of person to lay around,and there is so much he wants to do,but doesnt have the strength,he owns his own business(concrete)that is his passion,and he cant handle that type of work now.So he is very sad about that as well.He raised me like a father,so it is quite sad to see also,but I dont show him that.I am not going to give up him,even if he gives up on himself.I will be updating you guys,when I know more Thursday.Thanks for all of you guys comments.

    Much Blessings To All
  • eric38
    eric38 Member Posts: 583
    #8
    djman said:

    Family In Need Of Help or Advice
    First all I want to thank all of you,Pam,Shayenne,Tiny One,Kimby.I read all of your posts,and I have took a little advice from each one,Thanks so much,and you guys just gave me so much more hope.He currently is at a Cancer Facility,where he is getting chemo.He actually had his Chemo today,and they will be taking the pump off Thursday,we are to meet with his doctor on Thurday,to discuss further,which direction we should go.He has a scan scheduled for Friday.I have been talking with my family about getting a second opinion,or a Major Cancer Center,such as Cancer Centers Of America.His doctors havent brought up surgery at this point.But I do know that he has been taking chemo for quite some time now,and it is not working,so something else has got to be done.He is losing weight,alot of weight,because he is not been having a appetite.I try to get him to eat small portions,througout the day,to try to keep his weight up.He has lost 30 pounds in less than three months,and his blood count is slowly going down(8.2),which they are thinking of giving him more blood.He is a fighter,and he is trying to fight this,although he is very emotional at times,because he is not the type of person to lay around,and there is so much he wants to do,but doesnt have the strength,he owns his own business(concrete)that is his passion,and he cant handle that type of work now.So he is very sad about that as well.He raised me like a father,so it is quite sad to see also,but I dont show him that.I am not going to give up him,even if he gives up on himself.I will be updating you guys,when I know more Thursday.Thanks for all of you guys comments.

    Much Blessings To All

    I was recently diagnosed
    I was recently diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and atleast 3 liver lesions. I just started chemo so it is too soon to tell how treatments are going but there are many people on this site worse off than me who persevered and made it through because they were pro active. It also helps to try to keep a positive attitude. You can`t make your grandfather have a positive attitude but I think it probably will help him if you do. Maybe some of your confidence will rub off. I know cancer is a serious thing and I am not making light of it but it helps me sometimes to make a joke out of it. I named my original tumor Buttercup and enacted an all out assault mission - Operation kill Buttercup. Now surgery has taken care of Buttercup but Buttercup had offspring, so now the mission is Operation kill Buttercup`s offspring. That sounds really bad if you don`t know the story behind it. I also got a t shirt that says Cancer? whatever.........
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    #9
    eric38 said:

    I was recently diagnosed
    I was recently diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and atleast 3 liver lesions. I just started chemo so it is too soon to tell how treatments are going but there are many people on this site worse off than me who persevered and made it through because they were pro active. It also helps to try to keep a positive attitude. You can`t make your grandfather have a positive attitude but I think it probably will help him if you do. Maybe some of your confidence will rub off. I know cancer is a serious thing and I am not making light of it but it helps me sometimes to make a joke out of it. I named my original tumor Buttercup and enacted an all out assault mission - Operation kill Buttercup. Now surgery has taken care of Buttercup but Buttercup had offspring, so now the mission is Operation kill Buttercup`s offspring. That sounds really bad if you don`t know the story behind it. I also got a t shirt that says Cancer? whatever.........

    Great attitude Eric38.......
    That's what it takes to beat it down................ keep it up bud...

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