Do you ever just not think about it,

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babebussie
babebussie Member Posts: 150
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
because sometimes i don't. I find myself going through life just not thinking about i have cancer. Even though i know it could kill me one day i just dont think about it at times. I wanna just forget about it and pretend it doesnt exist. I know it's there but i put my mind and thoughts into something and just move forward. Does this mean i'm in denial or am i normal. I was diagnosed in dec 2007, had the chemo, surgery more chemo then radiation, now i'm on tamoxifen. God has been good to me through this entire ordeal. I'm battleing mets to the bone now and in pain alot except when i have a bone infusion. I still go on with life even with this new issue.
Plz advise!! Is this okay?

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  • dbs1673
    dbs1673 Member Posts: 203
    #2
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    OK !!
    I think it is more than OK babebussie! It sounds like you are living life!! That's the best example of surviving that I can think of. I've said before that the word "survivor" doesn't fit for my mind as I like the action verb, "Surviving!" that tells us all no matter where we are in our treatment, surgeries, mood,pain, dwelling or it or not, we are "doing" and "living" life! Would you really be doing anything more productive,positive or healthier if you were to be thinking about it all the time?

    dawn
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
    #3
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    Sure
    I think that's great, babebussie. What's the point in living your life with anxiety and fear? As long as the denial does not include skipping Dr. appointments or otherwise not taking care of yourself, it sounds very healthy to me. And, yes, even though I am still in treatment, I also do not think about it all the time anymore. Usually I am too busy planning for the future or living life.

    Cheers,
    Mimi
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #4
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    Quite Normal
    You are quite normal Babe, no doubt about it. I think it is healthy that you are not dwelling on it, that it is not your every thought. You should be able to get out there and do whatever your body will allow you to without being reminded of the cancer. I have battled the beast 3 times and yes it is in the forefront of my mind, however it certainly is not on my mind all the time. I often say we cannot let cancer steal our joy, it has taken enough already it does not deserve our joy. By the way your faith is refreshing, I am glad you can draw strength from it. Enjoy your day Babe!

    image

    RE
  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    #5
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    I had the same treatment as
    I had the same treatment as you only in 2003/2004. I was a stage 3a. However I do not have mets to the bone. I have Parkinson's. I try to forget it but the tremors won't let me. I also have trouble with small finger movement. So I don't think too much about the cancer. I say if you can forget the cancer and go on with life you are doing good. I think you are very ok. The moments when you can forget cancer are the best and I hope you have many more.
  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
    #6
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    RE said:

    Quite Normal
    You are quite normal Babe, no doubt about it. I think it is healthy that you are not dwelling on it, that it is not your every thought. You should be able to get out there and do whatever your body will allow you to without being reminded of the cancer. I have battled the beast 3 times and yes it is in the forefront of my mind, however it certainly is not on my mind all the time. I often say we cannot let cancer steal our joy, it has taken enough already it does not deserve our joy. By the way your faith is refreshing, I am glad you can draw strength from it. Enjoy your day Babe!

    image

    RE

    Babe, I think you are
    Babe, I think you are perfectly normal. I think we all should just go on with our lives and never dwell on cancer. It is a stumbling block in our pathway of life, but, we move on, we move past it. Our lives are so full with wonderful, beautiful people, things and more. So, you just go on with your life and know that you are very normal..enjoy your life Babe!
  • cats_toy
    cats_toy Member Posts: 1,462 Member
    #7
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    it's almost like losing a loved one
    Babe, we are human, and yes, sometimes we dwell on things too much, but we have lives to live and it is healthy to move on. So, thinking about our mortality every second of the day is not normal nor healthy. I think about it as somewhat the same as when I lost my dad, I was devastated, but if I wallowed in my sorrow, I would drown. Having cancer is something like losing something of ourselves, and maybe losing our belief that we are invincible.
    You are perfectly normal! (at least in that area.....he he)
    =^..^=
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
    #8
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    cats_toy said:

    it's almost like losing a loved one
    Babe, we are human, and yes, sometimes we dwell on things too much, but we have lives to live and it is healthy to move on. So, thinking about our mortality every second of the day is not normal nor healthy. I think about it as somewhat the same as when I lost my dad, I was devastated, but if I wallowed in my sorrow, I would drown. Having cancer is something like losing something of ourselves, and maybe losing our belief that we are invincible.
    You are perfectly normal! (at least in that area.....he he)
    =^..^=

    I think you are just as
    I think you are just as normal as the rest of us. ( we are normal, aren't we? lol ) Ofcourse cancer is going to creep into our minds every now and then, how could it not? But, for the majority of our time, of our lives, we need to focus on anything and everything else. We have lives to live and that is what we all need to do. You have been thru a lot Babe, a lot. I pray that your pain subsides and that your beautiful smile always prevails!
  • GreeneyedGirl
    GreeneyedGirl Member Posts: 1,077
    #9
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    Jeanne D said:

    I think you are just as
    I think you are just as normal as the rest of us. ( we are normal, aren't we? lol ) Ofcourse cancer is going to creep into our minds every now and then, how could it not? But, for the majority of our time, of our lives, we need to focus on anything and everything else. We have lives to live and that is what we all need to do. You have been thru a lot Babe, a lot. I pray that your pain subsides and that your beautiful smile always prevails!

    Ups n downs
    Life is full of them. When we're up~Life is great, carefree. when we're down, man its a bummer and our world kinda crashes. But, we get back UP and dust ourselves off.... and keep pressin forward..just like it appears you are doing. Keep it UP~((((smiles n hugs)))
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
    #10
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    GreeneyedGirl said:

    Ups n downs
    Life is full of them. When we're up~Life is great, carefree. when we're down, man its a bummer and our world kinda crashes. But, we get back UP and dust ourselves off.... and keep pressin forward..just like it appears you are doing. Keep it UP~((((smiles n hugs)))

    I don't always think about
    I don't always think about cancer, but, it is always there, if that makes sense. Maybe, I am just still to newly diagnosed with bc. And, I am sure that once finished with treatments, and, with some time ( years hopefully ) I will be able to go thru hours, even days without thinking of it. Don't get me wrong Babe, I love my life and I live a very full life. But right now for me, bc is there and in the forefront. But, I don't let it define me, who I am, or what I do or think. I survived it and I am living a great life!
  • rjjj
    rjjj Member Posts: 1,822 Member
    #11
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    Kristin N said:

    I don't always think about
    I don't always think about cancer, but, it is always there, if that makes sense. Maybe, I am just still to newly diagnosed with bc. And, I am sure that once finished with treatments, and, with some time ( years hopefully ) I will be able to go thru hours, even days without thinking of it. Don't get me wrong Babe, I love my life and I live a very full life. But right now for me, bc is there and in the forefront. But, I don't let it define me, who I am, or what I do or think. I survived it and I am living a great life!

    Can't help it when i look in the mirror
    I AM always surprised when i look in the mirror.. what i feel inside and the image i see do not coincide,, but i know hair will grow, breast may not lol but i will always be what i feel inside. luv, jackie
  • NorcalJ
    NorcalJ Member Posts: 187
    #12
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    rjjj said:

    Can't help it when i look in the mirror
    I AM always surprised when i look in the mirror.. what i feel inside and the image i see do not coincide,, but i know hair will grow, breast may not lol but i will always be what i feel inside. luv, jackie

    Not dwelling on BC
    RIGHT ON BABE! We are not just BC. Yes, it has shaped our outlook on life, but hopefully given us a better appreciation of everything and everyone around us. I'd say your doing it just right. One day at a time, and appreciating and loving it all!
    Keep up the great "tude, because if you're crazy, then we must all be in that big rubber room together.

    Hugs,
    Jan
    P.S.
    You probably know this, but one of the best meds for pain relief of bone pain are NSAID's---like ibuprophen (Advil, Motrin). If you haven't tried it, ask your Onc. they're usually great with pain control help.
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
    #13
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    You are doing GREAT, Babe!
    Yes, it's AWESOME that you DON'T think about it all the time. I think of my risk of recurrence as a shadow of sorts. It's always behind me somewhere; but, most of the time, I can't see it - so, I don't think about it. This is just my own way.

    No, you're not in denial, dear. And, you're BETTER than normal! Survivorship = life. We endure whatever treatments in order to live.

    You keep living, Babe. That's the whole point.

    Always best wishes to you.

    Kind regards, Susan
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
    #14
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    Christmas Girl said:

    You are doing GREAT, Babe!
    Yes, it's AWESOME that you DON'T think about it all the time. I think of my risk of recurrence as a shadow of sorts. It's always behind me somewhere; but, most of the time, I can't see it - so, I don't think about it. This is just my own way.

    No, you're not in denial, dear. And, you're BETTER than normal! Survivorship = life. We endure whatever treatments in order to live.

    You keep living, Babe. That's the whole point.

    Always best wishes to you.

    Kind regards, Susan

    Babe, I think everyone
    Babe, I think everyone thinks about it at times. They have to. But, the main thing is to live your life and continue on the best that you can. We did survive it, and, we survived bc to live, not to dwell on negatism.
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #15
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    Kylez said:

    Babe, I think everyone
    Babe, I think everyone thinks about it at times. They have to. But, the main thing is to live your life and continue on the best that you can. We did survive it, and, we survived bc to live, not to dwell on negatism.

    I couldn't have said it better....
    On June 30 of this year, I will be 3 years post treatment, almost 4 years post diagnosis. Nearly 5 years post diagnosis on my rectal cancer.

    I think about it occasionally, I need to be careful lifting with my 'special' arm, and watch what I eat to avoid long visits to the bathroom (lactose intollerant from the rectal chemo).

    But, yeah, life is to be lived!!! Otherwise, why would we fight so hard to survive?

    Hugs, Kathi
  • jojo elizapest
    jojo elizapest Member Posts: 122
    #16
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    yeah!
    sounds incredibly healthy to me! my favorite moments are when family and friends 'forget' about the cancer too! For instance this memorial day I was asking (beggin) my adult son to just stay a little longer and go kayaking with me....He wanted to get home to waiting girlfriend, technology etc. and replied..."Its not like its the end of the world". There was a time just after diagnosis when it felt like it was that every request, every experience was like it was the last one...but now his remark just caught him a spray from the kitchen sink....
  • Jan_M
    Jan_M Member Posts: 116
    #17
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    jojo elizapest said:

    yeah!
    sounds incredibly healthy to me! my favorite moments are when family and friends 'forget' about the cancer too! For instance this memorial day I was asking (beggin) my adult son to just stay a little longer and go kayaking with me....He wanted to get home to waiting girlfriend, technology etc. and replied..."Its not like its the end of the world". There was a time just after diagnosis when it felt like it was that every request, every experience was like it was the last one...but now his remark just caught him a spray from the kitchen sink....

    I think when your family
    I think when your family starts treating you NORMAL, then you can forget about it. At least until you see a mirror and see no hair.

    So I think that being able to live without always thinking about it, is the new normal.
  • djteach
    djteach Member Posts: 273
    #18
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    Jan_M said:

    I think when your family
    I think when your family starts treating you NORMAL, then you can forget about it. At least until you see a mirror and see no hair.

    So I think that being able to live without always thinking about it, is the new normal.

    Hey Babe,
    Girl, you just
    Hey Babe,
    Girl, you just keep on keepin' on!!! You are one strong warrior so of course it is normal to go back to your life and the living of that life with everything you've got. Sending you good thoughts.

    Love and gentle hugs,
    Donna
  • labtech
    labtech Member Posts: 37
    #19
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    djteach said:

    Hey Babe,
    Girl, you just
    Hey Babe,
    Girl, you just keep on keepin' on!!! You are one strong warrior so of course it is normal to go back to your life and the living of that life with everything you've got. Sending you good thoughts.

    Love and gentle hugs,
    Donna

    absoulutly normal
    I have people say to me i think you should seek counseling, i ask myself why? i have a wonderful sister and mother who are there for me whenver i want them and not only that but sitting in a group is hard for me because i hear of people who are not a fortuanate as i am and i want to help and know i can't. that's not to say i don't think of it i do but then remember all the blessings i have in my life and try to move on to somethig else. it's not something you forget but just put in the back for a day or so until our next treatment or looking at yourself in the mirror there are always reminders of course. do what they tell you to do and move on is my feeling.


    tracey
  • Alexis F
    Alexis F Member Posts: 3,598
    #20
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    labtech said:

    absoulutly normal
    I have people say to me i think you should seek counseling, i ask myself why? i have a wonderful sister and mother who are there for me whenver i want them and not only that but sitting in a group is hard for me because i hear of people who are not a fortuanate as i am and i want to help and know i can't. that's not to say i don't think of it i do but then remember all the blessings i have in my life and try to move on to somethig else. it's not something you forget but just put in the back for a day or so until our next treatment or looking at yourself in the mirror there are always reminders of course. do what they tell you to do and move on is my feeling.


    tracey

    I think we always think
    I think we always think about it. The point is to not let it influence your life in a negative way. And maybe, after years of survival, it lessens, I don't know, but, I hope so. Life is too short to let it take away even one happy moment! And, how are you doing Babe?

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