looking for experienced opinions
Comments
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Second opinion
Second opinion, second opinion, second opinion!!!! It is screaming at me! First of all, any doctor who is delivering this diagnosis to a woman and can only afford ten minutes is not the doctor for me. My surgeon spent probably at least 30 minutes with my husband, my daughter and me, answering questions and giving me my alternatives. It may be that the best treatment for your mom is a mastectomy, but this is a major decision and I would want at least two people to agree that it is the only solution before I agreed to do it.
And you ARE right--it must be your Mother's decision. Hopefully she will get a lot of information and talk to some people who have experienced this before she decides. I visited with four breast cancer survivors before I made my choices and I felt very comfortable with the path I chose.
Best wishes to your mom and you and your family as you begin this journey. It is not a trip that any of us wants to take, but we deal with what life gives us and you will, too. Stay on this board and you will receive lots of information and support.0 -
I second the second opinionjakeca said:Second opinion
Second opinion, second opinion, second opinion!!!! It is screaming at me! First of all, any doctor who is delivering this diagnosis to a woman and can only afford ten minutes is not the doctor for me. My surgeon spent probably at least 30 minutes with my husband, my daughter and me, answering questions and giving me my alternatives. It may be that the best treatment for your mom is a mastectomy, but this is a major decision and I would want at least two people to agree that it is the only solution before I agreed to do it.
And you ARE right--it must be your Mother's decision. Hopefully she will get a lot of information and talk to some people who have experienced this before she decides. I visited with four breast cancer survivors before I made my choices and I felt very comfortable with the path I chose.
Best wishes to your mom and you and your family as you begin this journey. It is not a trip that any of us wants to take, but we deal with what life gives us and you will, too. Stay on this board and you will receive lots of information and support.
Absolutely, keeping shopping around for a doctor. I know it is stressful and you just want to make a decision and get on with it, but it is worth it to find someone that you can work with. You don't want to delay too long before surgery, though. But afterwards, make sure that the oncologist you choose has time for you. My doc. answers every one of my questions, every time. That is your absolute right as a patient. You should never feel that your concerns aren't of the utmost importance to your doctor. Good luck with everything.0 -
Thank you, thank you forjakeca said:Second opinion
Second opinion, second opinion, second opinion!!!! It is screaming at me! First of all, any doctor who is delivering this diagnosis to a woman and can only afford ten minutes is not the doctor for me. My surgeon spent probably at least 30 minutes with my husband, my daughter and me, answering questions and giving me my alternatives. It may be that the best treatment for your mom is a mastectomy, but this is a major decision and I would want at least two people to agree that it is the only solution before I agreed to do it.
And you ARE right--it must be your Mother's decision. Hopefully she will get a lot of information and talk to some people who have experienced this before she decides. I visited with four breast cancer survivors before I made my choices and I felt very comfortable with the path I chose.
Best wishes to your mom and you and your family as you begin this journey. It is not a trip that any of us wants to take, but we deal with what life gives us and you will, too. Stay on this board and you will receive lots of information and support.
Thank you, thank you for your time and thoughts. You are absolutely right and this is the whole family's wish- a second opinion. I will be here as often as possible and hope all is well for you, too.0 -
Thank you so much for yourjakeca said:Second opinion
Second opinion, second opinion, second opinion!!!! It is screaming at me! First of all, any doctor who is delivering this diagnosis to a woman and can only afford ten minutes is not the doctor for me. My surgeon spent probably at least 30 minutes with my husband, my daughter and me, answering questions and giving me my alternatives. It may be that the best treatment for your mom is a mastectomy, but this is a major decision and I would want at least two people to agree that it is the only solution before I agreed to do it.
And you ARE right--it must be your Mother's decision. Hopefully she will get a lot of information and talk to some people who have experienced this before she decides. I visited with four breast cancer survivors before I made my choices and I felt very comfortable with the path I chose.
Best wishes to your mom and you and your family as you begin this journey. It is not a trip that any of us wants to take, but we deal with what life gives us and you will, too. Stay on this board and you will receive lots of information and support.
Thank you so much for your reply. It's very appreciated. Best wishes back to you and your family. We are readying ourselves for this journey and knowing we can speak with others is in itself a blessing.0 -
Bed side manner is one thing
Bed side manner is one thing but you should consider their background and how much experience they have also. I found this site for New York, http://www.health.state.ny.us/
At the left is 'doctor profile' and 'physician discipline'.0 -
Hi Brenda: There are so many
Hi Brenda: There are so many overwhelming factors when given a cancer diagnosis. The first advise would be to get a second opinion and find a different doctor. Where in Hudson Valley do you live? You may want to go to Sloan for a second opinion and NYU also has an excellent breast center that has breast surgeons, plastic surgeons, and oncologists. The ultimate decision is your mom's but having another opinion is important. Please keep us posted. Hugs, Lili0 -
One question...did you hear him say this to her?
Now, don't get mad...it's just that we cancer survivors tend to suffer from selective hearing. If it was only mom who was at the appointment, my suggestion is for someone else (you?) to call the doctor and ask for the summary....it's rather interesting....I read my lab/path report from my breast cancer. Couldn't figure out why they wanted to do chemo (this was my second cancer in a year..) for DCIS. I got on the phone with a WONDERFUL ACS nurse who stepped thru the report, line by line, with me. Yeah, it was DCIS...for 15%, the other 85% was invasive ductal carcinoma...
But, I agree with all, it never hurts to get a second opinion...just make sure someone is there with mom to hear it...
Hugs, Kathi0 -
experiernce
My experience is I had to find a doctor that I was totally comfortable with and he was able to sit down with me and my family and give the answers to all of our questions. I felt confident that my doctor was right for me. And a second opinion is your legal right. Do it, but dont waste time about it. Call the local acs center near you and ask the lady who answers the phone for recommendations. She probably is a survivor as well.0 -
Get a new doctor
Brenda, going thru Cancer is tough enough and you need a doctor that is going to help you..not just seem heartless and rush you thru your decisions. Find a new doctor is my advice. It is very important to feel comfortable with your doctor and to be able to take your time with them inre to any appointment you might have. I changed my oncologist once and I am glad that I did. Good luck sweetie!0 -
Get a new doctor
Brenda, going thru Cancer is tough enough and you need a doctor that is going to help you..not just seem heartless and rush you thru your decisions. Find a new doctor is my advice. It is very important to feel comfortable with your doctor and to be able to take your time with them inre to any appointment you might have. I changed my oncologist once and I am glad that I did. Good luck sweetie!0 -
Find another doctor ...
Bless your heart for being this kind of support for your mother.
Find another doctor. Go to an oncologist. I don't know the Cancer Centers of America ...
Now that I am completeing my radiation treatment, I know what would have been a better course for me. I am getting my treatment through Montana Cancer Center and am very please with them.
Now I know that the Center recommends that patients come in and meet with their entire team of doctors ... oncologist, surgeon, plastic surgeon, raditiation doctor. Meet with the entire team in the beginning and learn what the steps are in your treatment.
The best thing that you mother has is you and your family's support. It is a long journey, the knowledge you gain by meeting with your entire "team" before treatment will make is much easier for you all.0
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