Confused and upset
Comments
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Happy Valentine's Day to everyoneblueroses said:Karma
Hi Suesue, I am so a believer in Karma and although I don't always do the right thing and turn the other cheek when someone poops on me, lol, I really do try. It's only when I think that they could learn something from a subtle or not so subtle response(lol) that I will step forward. I had a bone marrow transplant 18 years ago for NHL and while treatments are no doubt better today I am here to tell you that I have not had any recurrance since then and the doctors consider me cured. So keep the faith. I also didnt need a donor because the cancer wasnt in my marrow so I didnt have to deal with graft/host disease so it was a somewhat less invasive form of treatment but still very tough indeed. I was one of the first stem cell transplants. Sounds like you are a spiritual person which is very important, if it wasn't for my faith I don't know what I would have done. So do keep the faith, pray and have prayer chains going for you too if you can - I believe there is great power in prayer, especially group prayer. I hope and pray that a match becomes available for you. All the best. Blessings, Blueroses.
Not everyone on here has a special "someone" in their lives. Not all of us will get roses, cards, chocolates, jewelry, balloons on this day. There isn't always someone there to hold our hand and give us a hug when we need it. We wake up alone. Some of us during our struggles with cancer and survivorship have been betrayed, neglected, slighted, misunderstood, left for dead. We can be alone but we are never really alone. We have discovered a strength within that we never knew we had and this we enable us to keep on going no matter what. We will never lose hope. The friends we have now will be our true friends. And one day we will all meet again those we loved and have been loved by in our true Home. They stand by us and wait for us. They have never stopped caring. So don't give up. If you have a bad day, the next day will be better. There is nothing to fear. Hold on.0 -
How NiceDreamdove said:Happy Valentine's Day to everyone
Not everyone on here has a special "someone" in their lives. Not all of us will get roses, cards, chocolates, jewelry, balloons on this day. There isn't always someone there to hold our hand and give us a hug when we need it. We wake up alone. Some of us during our struggles with cancer and survivorship have been betrayed, neglected, slighted, misunderstood, left for dead. We can be alone but we are never really alone. We have discovered a strength within that we never knew we had and this we enable us to keep on going no matter what. We will never lose hope. The friends we have now will be our true friends. And one day we will all meet again those we loved and have been loved by in our true Home. They stand by us and wait for us. They have never stopped caring. So don't give up. If you have a bad day, the next day will be better. There is nothing to fear. Hold on.
Hi Dream, I awoke this morning as you did, in basically your same position and thinking of all those things past and present on this Valentine's Day. I appreciate your sentiments and words of encouragement. Blessings, Blueroses.0 -
Why? I Have known Cancer 7 years - Ovarianblueroses said:How Nice
Hi Dream, I awoke this morning as you did, in basically your same position and thinking of all those things past and present on this Valentine's Day. I appreciate your sentiments and words of encouragement. Blessings, Blueroses.
I may look at things a little different. But we all have to face people we love that they as well as ourselves are going to die of something sometime. And yes seeing people suffer hurts. But what hurts more is when there is no support especially on those days your feeling you need some help. Bluerose I agree with what has been said but find someone who will be there when you need them. Maybe send your friend a card once in awhile to let her know you still care but maybe you will find someone who will stand by you. People have to understand that just because one person lives a year doesn't mean another won't live 20 years or whatever. People die from many things and because someone has cancer or diabetis or whatever we are still here and don't write us off just because we have cancer. My husband passed away 3 years ago from cancer but I don't look at it like I will die any time soon. Got to be here for my sons. I will be starting chemo after a two month break on Wed. I hope all have a Happy Valentine's DAY and I hope I didn't sound confusing. I will always be here to talk and believe I have my bad days but I remember what my husband said "Take one day at a time". No matter if your in good health or not thats all any can do and I am planning some 3 day weekend getaways, tired or not. hee hee May be eating my words after chemo LOL
Take care and there will be someone out there to help
Prayers and Hugs
Sandy0 -
It's the getting out part that's trickygreen50 said:Why? I Have known Cancer 7 years - Ovarian
I may look at things a little different. But we all have to face people we love that they as well as ourselves are going to die of something sometime. And yes seeing people suffer hurts. But what hurts more is when there is no support especially on those days your feeling you need some help. Bluerose I agree with what has been said but find someone who will be there when you need them. Maybe send your friend a card once in awhile to let her know you still care but maybe you will find someone who will stand by you. People have to understand that just because one person lives a year doesn't mean another won't live 20 years or whatever. People die from many things and because someone has cancer or diabetis or whatever we are still here and don't write us off just because we have cancer. My husband passed away 3 years ago from cancer but I don't look at it like I will die any time soon. Got to be here for my sons. I will be starting chemo after a two month break on Wed. I hope all have a Happy Valentine's DAY and I hope I didn't sound confusing. I will always be here to talk and believe I have my bad days but I remember what my husband said "Take one day at a time". No matter if your in good health or not thats all any can do and I am planning some 3 day weekend getaways, tired or not. hee hee May be eating my words after chemo LOL
Take care and there will be someone out there to help
Prayers and Hugs
Sandy
Unfortunately I am pretty shut in due to a list of after effects from my treatments that would put you to sleep so that's a big part of my issues - just not being able to get out with any kind of predictability - very frustrating. I can't even imagin how many specialists appointments that I have had to cancel due to dizziness from the heart damage from the chemo or the fatigue or the chronic respiratory issues, yada yada. The uncertainty of my health from day to day keeps me from joining groups or doing anything on a regular basis but I do what I can. Thanks for the wisdom Sandy, it's important to listen to all kinds of viewpoints. Blueroses.0 -
I Do know What you meanblueroses said:It's the getting out part that's tricky
Unfortunately I am pretty shut in due to a list of after effects from my treatments that would put you to sleep so that's a big part of my issues - just not being able to get out with any kind of predictability - very frustrating. I can't even imagin how many specialists appointments that I have had to cancel due to dizziness from the heart damage from the chemo or the fatigue or the chronic respiratory issues, yada yada. The uncertainty of my health from day to day keeps me from joining groups or doing anything on a regular basis but I do what I can. Thanks for the wisdom Sandy, it's important to listen to all kinds of viewpoints. Blueroses.
I too have had many times that you have to stay in. I have used a wheel chair. Sometimes people would go with me to Wal-mart and I would get in their electric chair to shop for small amount of time. Oh yea and run over the clothes in the clothing department. LOl I am fortunate to be in the country with a porch and sit and watch the birds and squirrels. I have also been frustrated when I haven't seen someone so "I" will call them and they would say "OH didn't know if you felt like company or wanted to talk since you just had chemo." Ok, can't they just call and see, I would tell them I don't feel like talking today or could you call tomorrow. Geesh, but anyway I hope Bluerose and all of you have some strong days to do something you like. Strong chemos are frustrating and in my second time around my husband was there and said just remember you will get some stronger days. Its ironic they found his cancer two years after mine and he passed away over three years ago and I am still here. He still feels like a part of me. I pray all of us will be apart of the cure and have a party and dance.
Prayers and hugs to all
Sandy0 -
LIFEblueroses said:Karma
Hi Suesue, I am so a believer in Karma and although I don't always do the right thing and turn the other cheek when someone poops on me, lol, I really do try. It's only when I think that they could learn something from a subtle or not so subtle response(lol) that I will step forward. I had a bone marrow transplant 18 years ago for NHL and while treatments are no doubt better today I am here to tell you that I have not had any recurrance since then and the doctors consider me cured. So keep the faith. I also didnt need a donor because the cancer wasnt in my marrow so I didnt have to deal with graft/host disease so it was a somewhat less invasive form of treatment but still very tough indeed. I was one of the first stem cell transplants. Sounds like you are a spiritual person which is very important, if it wasn't for my faith I don't know what I would have done. So do keep the faith, pray and have prayer chains going for you too if you can - I believe there is great power in prayer, especially group prayer. I hope and pray that a match becomes available for you. All the best. Blessings, Blueroses.
Hi, Rose:
I don't have cancer, but my bonemarrow produce less and less
red blood cells, by the date my bonemarrow stop produce red
cells then I am done. But I am gladful that I know I am dieing,
then I can go to do what ever I need to do before I die,
I was going to retire in Sept. since the economic down turn,
my boss cut my hours (no one in my office knows I have Myelofibrosis)
That is perfect, I can go to travel a week every month,
that is what I decide to do, and I aslo see a Can. and Chinese
doctors, the chinese medicine costs me a lot of money a month,
the can.medicine is free. At the monment, I have not seen a big
improvement yet, chinese medicine takes a long time to see
improvement, as long as my condition is not getting worst,
that means, I don't turn into Blood cancer, then I am o.k.
At the same time, I still can making a living.
I am a Buddhaist, I pray all the time.............
I have faith, if this is my life, I will accept it, I never say
" Why Me", I should say " Why Not ME".
I am trying to learn "PATIEANT" I am a very inpatieant person.
GO, GO, GO, I have to slwo down for the rest of my life, and try
to enjoy it. I am not afraid to die, I just will move to another
world, a better pure land.
Regards,
sue0 -
Well put Suesuesue555 said:LIFE
Hi, Rose:
I don't have cancer, but my bonemarrow produce less and less
red blood cells, by the date my bonemarrow stop produce red
cells then I am done. But I am gladful that I know I am dieing,
then I can go to do what ever I need to do before I die,
I was going to retire in Sept. since the economic down turn,
my boss cut my hours (no one in my office knows I have Myelofibrosis)
That is perfect, I can go to travel a week every month,
that is what I decide to do, and I aslo see a Can. and Chinese
doctors, the chinese medicine costs me a lot of money a month,
the can.medicine is free. At the monment, I have not seen a big
improvement yet, chinese medicine takes a long time to see
improvement, as long as my condition is not getting worst,
that means, I don't turn into Blood cancer, then I am o.k.
At the same time, I still can making a living.
I am a Buddhaist, I pray all the time.............
I have faith, if this is my life, I will accept it, I never say
" Why Me", I should say " Why Not ME".
I am trying to learn "PATIEANT" I am a very inpatieant person.
GO, GO, GO, I have to slwo down for the rest of my life, and try
to enjoy it. I am not afraid to die, I just will move to another
world, a better pure land.
Regards,
sue
You have a wonderful outlook on life and all that it entails. I have often looked at Buddhism, it makes so much sense to me, such a gentle way of being. I pray for nothing but the best for you Suesue and I hope to be able to learn from some of the Buddhist ways, I think we can all benefit from many aspects of this faith. Blessings Sue, Blueroses.0 -
Some people don't know how to handle usgreen50 said:I Do know What you mean
I too have had many times that you have to stay in. I have used a wheel chair. Sometimes people would go with me to Wal-mart and I would get in their electric chair to shop for small amount of time. Oh yea and run over the clothes in the clothing department. LOl I am fortunate to be in the country with a porch and sit and watch the birds and squirrels. I have also been frustrated when I haven't seen someone so "I" will call them and they would say "OH didn't know if you felt like company or wanted to talk since you just had chemo." Ok, can't they just call and see, I would tell them I don't feel like talking today or could you call tomorrow. Geesh, but anyway I hope Bluerose and all of you have some strong days to do something you like. Strong chemos are frustrating and in my second time around my husband was there and said just remember you will get some stronger days. Its ironic they found his cancer two years after mine and he passed away over three years ago and I am still here. He still feels like a part of me. I pray all of us will be apart of the cure and have a party and dance.
Prayers and hugs to all
Sandy
I have, like many others with cancer, experienced friends not calling anymore because it is simpler just not to call than risk hurting our feelings or them bothering us when we are resting. But at the root of it I do believe they are afraid to face their own mortality and I guess they see the reminder of that in us, no matter how we are doing at the time with our treatments or recovery.
I believe that your husband is still a part of you and that's why you feel as you do. He obviously said some things to you that are helping you through your rough times so in that way he is still helping you along. At least that's what I believe anywho. Hope this reply to your posting finds you having a good day. Blessings, Blueroses.0 -
THANKSblueroses said:Well put Sue
You have a wonderful outlook on life and all that it entails. I have often looked at Buddhism, it makes so much sense to me, such a gentle way of being. I pray for nothing but the best for you Suesue and I hope to be able to learn from some of the Buddhist ways, I think we can all benefit from many aspects of this faith. Blessings Sue, Blueroses.
Rose, Thank you for your support, I like to practice Buddism,
but I have not have enought patient some times, I am lazy too....
I try to do more, but I don't force myself to be any one..
We all should have faith and live our happiness life.
Regards
sue0 -
no absolutely not! the
no absolutely not! the invasion of cancer into our bodies and the chemicals used to treat the disease, reak havoc on us. we don't feel well and we are scared of what is coming. our heads take a beating too. we are more vulnerable and at times have a hard time processing how others are responding to us. i have had similar situations. people that i thought were friends, distancing themselves from me because of cancer. i have decided that when the chips are down you discover who your true friends are. as an example, a woman that i know brought us dinner once a week all the way through chemo and radiation. and other people that i knew only casually, sent me cards and sent over food. it was a surprise to me but as i thought about after treatment i thought that the important thing about this was the way i acted to people because you of course cannot control how other people process things. who knows what is going on in someone's life. so although i was hurt as well, i have come to believe that how i am feeling and treating others is the important thing. some people just don't get it!l hugs, peggy0 -
I am here for you
Hi Shirley,
I have talked to you on chat (as well as some others on the message boards) but I don't check the boards as often as I might.
I just now read your post and feel for you and the pain of realizing your friend can't be there for you. It is sad but true that some people just can't deal with cancer. Cancer has touched my life many times, both in my family and myself and outside my family. I know how alone a person can feel, whether caregiver, patient, or survivor.
I am here to listen any time you need to talk.
Suzanne0
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