My humerous surgery story

I'm using humor as one of my biggest battle weapons and one of the funniest things that happened was just minutes prior to my surgery. I was on the gurney, the nurse had put the funky cap over my hair, they were going over where the incision would be and making sure I knew exactly what to expect during surgery. The nurse got all done and looked at me closely and said, "I'm sorry, the nose ring has to go. During surgery there's almost a force field around you from all the instruments and light and your nose will actually get burned so you'll need to take that out." I looked at Doug (my wonderful hunny) who had been allowed to go back with me and asked him to take the ring out. I had a hood ring too and I again looked at Doug and we both started to laugh. "Guess that one will have to go to." I'd never taken it out before and I had gotten it prior to him so he didn't know how it worked either. He lifted my gown and attempted to get the ring out. His fingers are big and he couldn't work it out. He kept trying and trying. Pretty soon my doctor showed up and then his attendant. He asked what we were doing and kept a carefully bland face upon receiving my answer. Soon the attending nurses started coming over, assuming since the doctors were there that we were ready to roll..........um not quite yet folks. Meanwhile, Doug is still working over my privates trying to get the ring out. More and more nurses started to come over to see why everyone was gathered around my gurney. I wanted to sink right through the middle of it. Eventually we had 2 doctors and 6 nurses around my gurney and here I am with my privates exposed to all while Doug is madly trying to get the ring out. With the difficulty we were having, one of the nurses was going to find wire cutters when an older nurse in her early 50's and most definately a lesbian walked over and said she had lots of experience with rings and offered to take it out!! Gulp! I didn't know whether to laugh or moan in mortification. I know I turned scarlett. She got the ring off of my privates then offered to put it back on for me after surgery should I decide I wanted to, all I needed to do was call her to my ward and she'd be happy to come. Doug and I both stifled giggles until after she'd left. She definately helped me out of a tight spot and I truly appreciated it more than she'll know but I figure I'll leave it out since that area is going to be radiated anyway!!!