decisions

grandmagail
grandmagail Member Posts: 28
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Thank you all so much for your input. Just hearing what others have chosen and how it has worked out for them helps immensely. I have to admit that I am a bit frightened, anticipating surgery. I'm concerned with the pain and I had heard that the reconstruction was a painful process. Glad to know that the mastectomy is maybe not that painful? I do know that I can get through it. Thanks for touching on the work subject also. I am my only support and work full time at a University. I have a physical job, but I think they will help me out by giving me something easier. I welcome all the information that I can get and once again, thank you all. Gail

Comments

  • seof
    seof Member Posts: 819 Member
    #2
    We are all different, and I am not trying to tell you how you should be (OK, maybe I am, but I hope you understand my reasons) GET SOME HELP!!! You have made a good start by coming to this site. Contact your local American Cancer Society (look online at the ACS site to find one in your area). They can put you in touch with folks who can talk to you face-to-face. They can find folks who can help take you to treatments, help find a support group, someone who can help do your laundry when you are not able to lift the basket, or whatever. If not through ACS, find a support group somewhere, even if it's just someone to call to bring you a bottle of water when you just can't muster the energy to drive to the store. I realize that there are different levels of independence, and not everyone is comfortable asking for help, but I think cancer is one thing everyone needs help with sooner or later. Please don't try to be a lone ranger in this.

    So ends my soap box tirade. seof
  • cabbott
    cabbott Member Posts: 1,039 Member
    #3
    seof said:

    We are all different, and I am not trying to tell you how you should be (OK, maybe I am, but I hope you understand my reasons) GET SOME HELP!!! You have made a good start by coming to this site. Contact your local American Cancer Society (look online at the ACS site to find one in your area). They can put you in touch with folks who can talk to you face-to-face. They can find folks who can help take you to treatments, help find a support group, someone who can help do your laundry when you are not able to lift the basket, or whatever. If not through ACS, find a support group somewhere, even if it's just someone to call to bring you a bottle of water when you just can't muster the energy to drive to the store. I realize that there are different levels of independence, and not everyone is comfortable asking for help, but I think cancer is one thing everyone needs help with sooner or later. Please don't try to be a lone ranger in this.

    So ends my soap box tirade. seof

    Good advice! When I let folks know what was happening to me, fellow survivors really banded together and helped me out. I needed to meet some long-term folks who convinced me that I would live through the operation and recover to enjoy life again. They were also useful in helping me struggle through the little stuff that seemed overwhelming at the time: what to do with drains after surgery, how to minimize scarring, where to go to get bras and stuff, and so on. I had one group at church, another at the local Wellness Community Center (also found on the internet if your town doesn't have a nearby chapter), another at the local hospital, another at the National Breast Cancer Coalition, and then there was my family and where I worked. It is humbling to look back and think of all those who called, came by, and helped, but without them I'm sure I wouldn't have done as well as I did.
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
    #4
    All I want to say is~ GENERALLY speaking, Women are nurturers, and men are fixers. And, I see that you support yourself and work full time. You certainly put the GRRRR in Girl-Power! That having been said, please allow yourself to be nurtured! It is sometimes out of character for us to be on the receiving end of care. Set that notion aside, Gail! As was brought to my attention, it would be unkind of us to refuse any help offered to us. Be it a hug, a ride, a casserole...take whatever is offered! One thing this cancer does is make us tired. Emotionally and physically. Trust me when I say you will need and come to appreciate the attention given to you. And of course, your extended Cyber-Family is always available to understand, and commiserate with you.
    Hugs,
    Claudia

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