Help for Coping with Post-Treatment Depression?

Hi Barb,
Two weeks after I finished chemo in June I landed myself back in the hospital with a small bowel obstruction. Surgery was done, but that seemed to have been a major downer for me. I could not seem to snap out of the funk while recovering. I was already taking trazodone to help with sleep and decided to go on Lexapro. That definitely helped, but it did take a couple weeks to kick in. During that time I prayed a lot, meditated, wrote pages in a journal about what I was grateful for. My many pets (3 german shepherd and 2 cats) always seemed to calm me down. Whenever I would get really upset and start crying my husband would pull out a deck of UNO cards. My competitive spirit would then come back and I would end up whipping him just about everytime. I also made myself go outside everyday for some fresh air and sunlight. I would walk up and down the driveway to get some light excercise. I am in full blown menopause at 33(had a full hysterctomy with bowel resection in February). My oncologist put me on a low dose estrogen (says should be safe since I have no uterus) and it seems to be helping. Also I continued to stay in touch in with friends, family, and coworkers even though I didn't really feel like talking. Even on my worst days talking to my best friend always made me laugh. Lastly, retail therapy....not good on the bank account, but good for my mental health (after losing 100+ pounds I am a MAJOR clothes horse). When I was having a particularly bad day I ordered the whole Bobbi Brown fall makeup collection (I absolutely love it). Be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up. You have been through a lot and it WILL get better. I know for myself after being so strong through diagnosis, chemo and radiation, surgery, more chemo, broken foot, bowel obstruction and surgery, and seeing a plastic surgeon for a wound that just won't heal I think eventually it just all caught up with me.

Kiersten

Hi Barb.I'm in Australia. I had my surgery in Dec 2005. Felt strong and got through it well. Took on the 7 months of chemo and managed to continue working part-time on the non chemo days. Started a new job at the same place in January this year (2007) and everyone said, well, you're over your cancer and you've finished treatment and you've got the all clear, so now it's time to get on with it...but that's not how I felt. I too am depressed. I have just taken 8 weeks off work to re-assess my 'wellbeing' and to make some changes. I am on medication for the depression. I have joined a gym and I am trying to exercise 3-4 times a week. Not too full on, just gentle bicycle and treadmill at first to get my cardio fitness back. It is hard when the chemo and treatment is all over and you think, what next? Everything that you are thinking and feeling is completely normal. Lots of other people have experienced the same. I also burn aromotherapy oils during the day, there are specific ones for relaxation, harmony, it helps me. Talking is also important. You need to express how your feeling and have your feelings affirmed. Once you understand that you are not alone is this journey, you will start to heal. Take care of yourself. Brigid.

Barb

I just finished close to 10 months of treatment and have hit the same wall as you.
I thought I'd be just fine and prepare for an upcoming reversal surgery.
But found the same emotional response as you. Asking the questions like: what's next? How can I ever look at life the same again? What's the new normal?

My answer so far has been to begin exercise and get out to see the sun.
I'm also making sure that I plan time out with friends and family. In an attempt to preoccupy my mind at times and allow myself to deal with the changes in smaller bites.

I wish you all the best in your travels. Stay positive and celebrate in some way each and every day. Treat yourself in some small way, because you have earned that.

warm regards and positive thoughts of the future for you.

robinvan said:

Hi Barb, and Welcome...
There's a book by Susan Nessim that speaks of the "Emotional Aftermath". I think she names it very well. I wrote a piece on it in my cancer journal. There's also a link to her book which you can probably find in your library...
http://rob-pollock.blogspot.com/2007/08/emotional-aftermath.html
It may be helpful just to know that "this too shall pass" and hopefully you'll find a place of equilibrium down the road a piece.
BTW... Nice to meet you.
Rob; in Vancouver.

Thanks Rob. You always offer the best insight. I can usually get there, but it's by a convoluted path.
Jo Ann