Upcoming Holiday Blues

jeepnut
jeepnut Member Posts: 4
edited March 2014 in Emotional Support #1
I am having such a hard time wrapping my mind around what the right thing to do is. My father was recently sent home with little time left. He is completely bedridden and sleeps 22+ hours. Christmas is his favorite holiday and has always been a very special time for our family. We do not expect him to make it til Christmas so we have discussed having Xmas during Thanksgiving so he can be a part of it. I have doubts if this is the right thing to do. As previously stated, he is bedridden. Is it unfair to celebrate such a joyous time while he is dying? It is not like he could actually participate. He would just lay there and watch. Anyone been in a similiar situation. Please help.

Comments

  • TereB
    TereB Member Posts: 286 Member
    #2
    Hi, I am sorry about your Dad. I think celebrating Christmas at Thanksgiving is a good idea, especially since it was your Dad's favorite holiday and he can be there. It will be Christmas what you will be celebrating, and you will not be celebrating that he is dying. Even if he cannot participate actively, he can see everyone, see the xmas tree, etc. The important thing is celebrating Christmas with your Dad even if it is not Dec. 25.
    God Bless!
  • lfondots63
    lfondots63 Member Posts: 818 Member
    #3
    Hi, I'm sorry to hear about your dad. Mine just passed away suddenly in September from prostrate cancer. I wish we could have had him here to celebrate the holidays since it was his favorite too. I agree with tereb. I think the thing is your celebrating early to have your dad with you since it is his favorite holiday. It sounds like it is something that will make him happy to have his family around him. Think of it as celebrating how much you love your dad and showing him this. HUGS.

    Lisa F.
  • Cindy54
    Cindy54 Member Posts: 452
    #4
    Hi, I have come across this a little to late I'm afraid. I do hope you will post again and let us know what has been happening. I think you would be celebrating the memories of the past Christmases and the current one. I also think your Dad would enjoy just seeing all his loved ones around enjoying just being together. It may seem as if he is not really with it but your Dad is aware at what goes on around him. Just give him some extra hugs and kisses and let him know how much he is loved. I wish you the best. Cindy
  • Sidwil
    Sidwil Member Posts: 1
    #5
    lfondots63 said:

    Hi, I'm sorry to hear about your dad. Mine just passed away suddenly in September from prostrate cancer. I wish we could have had him here to celebrate the holidays since it was his favorite too. I agree with tereb. I think the thing is your celebrating early to have your dad with you since it is his favorite holiday. It sounds like it is something that will make him happy to have his family around him. Think of it as celebrating how much you love your dad and showing him this. HUGS.

    Lisa F.

    Be grateful in a way that you are not in my situation where I am the Dad with Terminal colon cancer and have children, a girl 17yrs, going into her final year of schooling and a 12 year old son.
    I have to get up every day to show they still have a father ;personal problem nomoney beside what I earn a wife who has had to go back to work after 16 years at home and I have nothing to aspire to as I know 2 years or less {have lived with this cancer for 2 1/2 years }and am blacklisted so I cannot provide transport for my family.
    Life for me is one joke, who said they were glad to have caqncer, sorry I cannot agree.
  • terato
    terato Member Posts: 375
    #6
    Sidwil said:

    Be grateful in a way that you are not in my situation where I am the Dad with Terminal colon cancer and have children, a girl 17yrs, going into her final year of schooling and a 12 year old son.
    I have to get up every day to show they still have a father ;personal problem nomoney beside what I earn a wife who has had to go back to work after 16 years at home and I have nothing to aspire to as I know 2 years or less {have lived with this cancer for 2 1/2 years }and am blacklisted so I cannot provide transport for my family.
    Life for me is one joke, who said they were glad to have caqncer, sorry I cannot agree.

    Sidwil,

    I agree that anyone glad to have cancer, or any other life-crisis, needs therapy! It is often an attempt at making lemonade from lemons; appreciating life more when it becomes threatened. My prayers are with you and your family that life will improve in the new year.

    Rick
  • jeanette7
    jeanette7 Member Posts: 18
    #7
    please, don,t feel lost, and alone , my mother died, afew years ago; i had rather god take one of my children then mom. i have a healing gifts
    from god, if you would like me to pray for him only in his last stage i am humble to do gods work.

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