To Jose

nanuk · May 2006

Ok Jose, I want an obit section; I have asked for a "memorial" site before..it doesn't matter to me what you call it, but Andrea and her struggle should not be forgotten, as well as Kris S., etc.
Not only can these persons live on on CSN, their stories and contributions will be an inspiration to the rest of us.. OK? Bud

dash4 · May 2006

I just want to add that I definitely agree with Bud..there is so much senseless pain and loss with this disease.....it only seems right to remember those who have fought so bravely and have given us so much through their journeys--it would be a chance to let them know how much they are loved and honored and never forgotten--it is hard to put this in words, but however you say it --you are right Bud and a very special person to fight for this--it is so very important...
Dash

spongebob · May 2006

There used to be a section for remembrance in the monthly CSN newsletter. Since the format has changed it seems to have gone away.

I would hesitate to put an "obit" section at the actual CSN site (like on the homepage) where it would be among the first thing newbies saw when they came to the site (imagine what a bummer that would be the first time you visit a site looking for hope, info and inspiration to fight). By putting it in the newsletter that is only read by members - most of whom have had the time to get to know how the site functions - you can pay tribute to the life of members who have gone on before us and help those of us in the community grieve at the same time... without intimidating new people who (I suspect) would be horribly put-off and/or frightened by seeing that.

I think it's a healthy thing to have in the newsletter - especially if it is not so much couched as an obit but as a celebration of the life of a friend.

Just my unsolicited two-cents-worth, I'll relinquish the soapbox to the next commentator now...

Cheers

- SB

spongebob · May 2006

spongebob said:
There used to be a section for remembrance in the monthly CSN newsletter. Since the format has changed it seems to have gone away.

I would hesitate to put an "obit" section at the actual CSN site (like on the homepage) where it would be among the first thing newbies saw when they came to the site (imagine what a bummer that would be the first time you visit a site looking for hope, info and inspiration to fight). By putting it in the newsletter that is only read by members - most of whom have had the time to get to know how the site functions - you can pay tribute to the life of members who have gone on before us and help those of us in the community grieve at the same time... without intimidating new people who (I suspect) would be horribly put-off and/or frightened by seeing that.

I think it's a healthy thing to have in the newsletter - especially if it is not so much couched as an obit but as a celebration of the life of a friend.

Just my unsolicited two-cents-worth, I'll relinquish the soapbox to the next commentator now...

Cheers

- SB

One last thing - Thanks, Bud, for bringing this issue to the fore. I believe it is a very important element of our grieving & closure process.

debralla · May 2006

spongebob said:
One last thing - Thanks, Bud, for bringing this issue to the fore. I believe it is a very important element of our grieving & closure process.

Bud
I have to say that I have to agree with SpongeBob .Before coming to this site I was a very depressed and desperate person . Desperate to find some Hope . I did go to a few other sites before coming here and there was so many negative post that I gave up. Then I found this site. I was a lurker for about a month and during that time I must of read every post on here. Yes some were sad , But most were encouraging , uplifting and heart felt posts . I then posted my story and was thrilled at the amount of people who responded. And knew I had found a home . If I would have come here and clicked on a obit section I would probably still be lying in my bed with the covers over my head . Although I agree that our friends that have gone need to be remembered . Lets do so in our hearts and through our posts . And the next time I read a post that says "NEW TO SITE AND I AM SCARED " I will reply to that person with "WELCOME AND COME ON IN "
Take Care and God Bless
Debra

drmrgirl47 · May 2006

I also agree with Spongebob and debralla.

jana11 · May 2006

spongebob said:
There used to be a section for remembrance in the monthly CSN newsletter. Since the format has changed it seems to have gone away.

I would hesitate to put an "obit" section at the actual CSN site (like on the homepage) where it would be among the first thing newbies saw when they came to the site (imagine what a bummer that would be the first time you visit a site looking for hope, info and inspiration to fight). By putting it in the newsletter that is only read by members - most of whom have had the time to get to know how the site functions - you can pay tribute to the life of members who have gone on before us and help those of us in the community grieve at the same time... without intimidating new people who (I suspect) would be horribly put-off and/or frightened by seeing that.

I think it's a healthy thing to have in the newsletter - especially if it is not so much couched as an obit but as a celebration of the life of a friend.

Just my unsolicited two-cents-worth, I'll relinquish the soapbox to the next commentator now...

Cheers

- SB

I am also on the side of not having an "obit" section to the site... but would love to have a rememberance page.... somewhere deep in the bowels of the website. Hee hee. Get it, bowels...

My heart is still in pieces and I am trying to snap it all together. I don't have the answers. However, for all the newbies here; it would be detrimental to push away scared and depressed people. The diagnosis is daunting enough, we need the site to be warm and fuzzy (at least most of the time.)
jana

markatger · May 2006

Maybe they could have it be part of a person's "personal web page". It is written by the person, but if they pass, then maybe it could be added to by members with their thoughts.

This way it wouldn't be an obvious separate section. The rembrances would just be "hidden" among other webpages.

I kind of wonder anyways when I have searched on webpages for semi-colons. Sometimes you come across ones that haven't been updated in a long time. You wonder has this person passed or are they just not active on the board any longer. I don't think it is sooo bad to know the truth.

I don't know though....just an idea

Maria

shmurciakova · May 2006

I agree with Maria. That is a very good idea, but unfortunately, many members including Andrea never created a personal web page. So what would we do then? I am not sure where on the website the Memorial page should go but I think that there should be one. Maybe the newsletter is a good place, but I think it would be nice to have it on the site somewhere that people can look back through and that would be more permanent.
JMHO. Susan.

nanuk · May 2006

spongebob said:
There used to be a section for remembrance in the monthly CSN newsletter. Since the format has changed it seems to have gone away.

I would hesitate to put an "obit" section at the actual CSN site (like on the homepage) where it would be among the first thing newbies saw when they came to the site (imagine what a bummer that would be the first time you visit a site looking for hope, info and inspiration to fight). By putting it in the newsletter that is only read by members - most of whom have had the time to get to know how the site functions - you can pay tribute to the life of members who have gone on before us and help those of us in the community grieve at the same time... without intimidating new people who (I suspect) would be horribly put-off and/or frightened by seeing that.

I think it's a healthy thing to have in the newsletter - especially if it is not so much couched as an obit but as a celebration of the life of a friend.

Just my unsolicited two-cents-worth, I'll relinquish the soapbox to the next commentator now...

Cheers

- SB

I tend to disagree..why should we put our "head in the sand" so to speak, just because someone died of this disease? The cancer centers remember people, the churches pray for all those gone before them. I don't think we are so fragile that we don't realize that we all die from something..this is the reality. I would rather remember the individual(s) for what they contributed, not just grieve for what is lost. Bud

Betsydoglover · May 2006

Lots of good suggestions here. As a newbie last June I would have been upset if confronted with an obit page. I lurked for a month before joining. Maybe a "Memories" page in a "Members Only" section could be set up. I have a feeling that most prospective members lurk on the discussion board at first and then decide to sign up.

Take care,
Betsy (who has been helped immensely by this discussion board and would hate for anything to discourage new members)

2bhealed · May 2006

I vote for some kind of place to go to see who has died. I met many friends in the chat room when I first came on here (back in the days when this discussion board was slow as molasses in january). I wonder about many of them...how they are.....if they're still around...etc. It would be nice to check in somewhere.

We all face our mortality and yes, when we get our dx we are forced to go there. But if there was a section on here that we could click on if we wanted, when we were ready, or when we wanted to check on an AWOL friend I don't see how that would scare anyone away. You wouldn't be forced to go on to the Obit Board if you didn't want to yet. But don't not put one on out of fear.

Jose, we need something.....

peace, emily who hopes when she dies she can live on here.......haunting you all with Juice Your Veggies!!!

Unknown · May 2006

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