My mom had lung removed...horrible anxiety!

hamkelley
hamkelley Member Posts: 3
edited March 2014 in Lung Cancer #1
Hello everybody....my mom found out the Friday before Labor Day that she had a tumor on her lung. She had the upper left lobe of her lung removed about 2 1/2 weeks ago. She got Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome while in the hospital and went back to the ICU. She survived the ARDS, after being told that 9 out of 10 times peopel don't survive it. She is having horrible anxiety! (Or anxiety is the only word she can think of to put a name to it). She says she can hardly function - as in showering she shakes so badly she can hardly wash,she is in tears a lot. She keeps asking if she is just going crazy. I don't know how to reassure her that her feelings are normal. I am her daughter the only one, I should know what to do. I don't. She is supposed to begin the first of four chemo trmnts on Monday. She doesn't know if she can handle it - emotionally. I am so scared for her. Does anyone have any advice. A good hotline to call at any time? Help. Any advice is so much appreciated.

Comments

  • MadelynJoe
    MadelynJoe Member Posts: 96
    #2
    I am very sorry to hear of your Mom's distress. I had my R lower lobe removed in June so I know what she is experiencing. It is not uncommon, after a cancer diagnosis, to be be VERY anxious, nervous and upset. For a while, I was afraid that I was losing my mind; I couldn't think clearly and would forget the most simple things. Reassure her that what she is going through is quite normal and will improve with time. Cancer is not only a physical disease, it is a very emotional thing for the patient AND for the patient's family.

    I went through a short round of chemo and I am still experiencing the after effects. She CAN do it -- just love her and support her during this difficult time. Keep reminding her that the symptoms she is having are quite normal.

    Prayers and good thoughts to both you and your Mom.

    Regards, Madelyn
  • hamkelley
    hamkelley Member Posts: 3
    #3
    MadelynJoe said:

    I am very sorry to hear of your Mom's distress. I had my R lower lobe removed in June so I know what she is experiencing. It is not uncommon, after a cancer diagnosis, to be be VERY anxious, nervous and upset. For a while, I was afraid that I was losing my mind; I couldn't think clearly and would forget the most simple things. Reassure her that what she is going through is quite normal and will improve with time. Cancer is not only a physical disease, it is a very emotional thing for the patient AND for the patient's family.

    I went through a short round of chemo and I am still experiencing the after effects. She CAN do it -- just love her and support her during this difficult time. Keep reminding her that the symptoms she is having are quite normal.

    Prayers and good thoughts to both you and your Mom.

    Regards, Madelyn

    Thank you so much for your wonderful heartfelt response. I will tell her. I just can't help but think she really needs to talk with someone who has been through what she is going through, or a professional. It's so hard for her to call me and be crying and wanting help and feeling so helpless!

    Thank you and God Bless!

    Kelley
  • cassis
    cassis Member Posts: 5
    #4
    hamkelley said:

    Thank you so much for your wonderful heartfelt response. I will tell her. I just can't help but think she really needs to talk with someone who has been through what she is going through, or a professional. It's so hard for her to call me and be crying and wanting help and feeling so helpless!

    Thank you and God Bless!

    Kelley

    Hi There!

    I also had my upper lobe removed from my left lung due to lung cancer...my operation was in late May and I went through four doses of chemo.

    Please tell your Mom to get on the computer and communicate with some of us who have shared her experience. It really helps to know there are others out there who have gone through the same thing and come out the other side intact!

    This site has chat rooms filled by people who can encourage her in winning the battle she is fighting.

    She is welcome to contact me by email:pmiles@erols.com

    Peggy
  • hamkelley
    hamkelley Member Posts: 3
    #5
    cassis said:

    Hi There!

    I also had my upper lobe removed from my left lung due to lung cancer...my operation was in late May and I went through four doses of chemo.

    Please tell your Mom to get on the computer and communicate with some of us who have shared her experience. It really helps to know there are others out there who have gone through the same thing and come out the other side intact!

    This site has chat rooms filled by people who can encourage her in winning the battle she is fighting.

    She is welcome to contact me by email:pmiles@erols.com

    Peggy

    I know this may sound very naive/stupid. But I keep reading over and over in all of the posts that it is normal for anxiety. But I guess I haven't seen anything real in depth on the topic. And I am really scared for how she is feeling. I know it has to be normal per say. But the magnitude of her feelings are sooo difficult to watch, I feel so helpless. She is really thinking that something is wrong with her, though I keep telling her that this IS normal. But I feel like what do I know? I am so going to try and get her on-line or to talk with someone, though she is not very computer savvy. I want to thank everyone for the e-mails I have read. Just reading them has helped me and I know that it will her also.

    I am so sorry for the pain/sorrow/feelings/life altering experiences that all of you very supportive cancer survivors and your families have endured. You will all always be in my prayers.

    Kelley
  • MadelynJoe
    MadelynJoe Member Posts: 96
    #6
    hamkelley said:

    Thank you so much for your wonderful heartfelt response. I will tell her. I just can't help but think she really needs to talk with someone who has been through what she is going through, or a professional. It's so hard for her to call me and be crying and wanting help and feeling so helpless!

    Thank you and God Bless!

    Kelley

    Dear "Ham":

    Tell your Mom that she can feel free to send me a message on this site, or have you send the message, at any time that she would like. We all support one another at CSN. She CAN make it and become a survivor; she must have faith in her ability to survive.

    Best regards, Madelyn
  • livin
    livin Member Posts: 318 Member
    #7
    I am sorry to hear about your Mother's situation I understand her anxiety and I have not had lung cancer. But I have had cancer 3 times 2 different cancers and 1 metast. When I found out that I had breast cancer and that the doctor had removed the spot that he thought looked like cancer with out even telling me until I had my next visit to find out the results of my biospy/ lumpectomy which I originally went in knowing I had a history of cyst. I was told that they had got all the cancer but I could not believe it. I could not eat, sleep or think right. I thought cancer was all through my body. This was even after I was told that it was a small cancer and the doctor was sure he got it all. It was horrible. The doctor had to give me small doses of xanax to help calm me which it did. I guess you can say I had the fear of the unknown. We all go through these stages with cancer until we can accept it. I took the other 2 cancers with stride. I did not have anymore breast cancer and no metast. from it. Its been 6 years this past October 18th. I know its hard but maybe she could put all those fears into fighting mode to beat her cancer and stay positive no matter what. I wish your Mother well tell her to try to hang in there things are going to get better. I remember one night I was so nervous I thought I was going to give myself a heart attack(sorry to be so blount) that when I said enough and got the meds and they helped me to get to sleep. As of that nite I have not taken a another med for anixety or depression even with having being dx. with Colon Cancer STAGE 3 THEN 3 YEARS LATER Colon Cancer that metast to my Liver. I know everyone is different. It will get easier for her. My Prayers are with you and your Mother. lIVIN
  • Plymouthean
    Plymouthean Member Posts: 262
    #8
    Hi, I had the upper 40% of my right lung removed just over 4 years ago. I experienced the same severe anxiety. I told my doctor, and she prescribed Atavan to control the sympoms. As time passed, I weaned myself from the Atavan to the extent that I use it only once per week, and I'm not sure that it's not just my "security blankie" now, and I don't really need it. The anxiety is real, but the doctor should be able to help. And don't you assume the burden of guilt for not being able to help your mom. Steer her to her doctor for help with this problem.
  • janmotel
    janmotel Member Posts: 3
    #9
    hi my dad had lung cancer and they removed half of his left bottom of his lung he keeps caughing always and we dont know if that is normal or not his surgery was in july. can you help?

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