Lung met
The biopsy results are back and the cancer has spread to my lung. It's a small lesion. I will see the oncologist Monday and get the details for the next round of treatment. My doctor was off today and I had to throw a fit to get his partner to give me the results. He wanted me to wait until Monday.
After 15 months cancer free I was beginning to relax and believe that I might even be cured. This really sucks!
I really don't want to deal with chemo or surgery and I hate having to wait until Monday to find out what comes next! I just want to have a normal life where for a change things go well.
I was getting ready to look for a better job and to find a fieldwork placement so that I could finish school. Now I'm stuck because I can't make any commitments.
I'm trying really hard not to totally freak out in front of my kids, but I'm having a difficult time. I think I did better with the initial diagnosis.
Sorry this is so long and thanks for letting me vent.
Jamie
Comments
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Hi Jamie - I am so sorry that a new bit of cancer has been found. It is no wonder that you are upset.....perfectly normal. This must be very scary. This is probably not the right time, but I will mention it as i have thought about recurrences for myself. Have you thought about a strong nutritional approach to see if you can set your body up to be a poor environment for cancer to thrive? There is good data out there -- even live data (people!!) here on site......No pressure, but it could be an option for you to think about...... Take care this weekend and know that my thoughts are with you and that your doctor will be working for you. All the best - Maura0
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Dear Jamie, It must be truly devastating to think you are over this terrible beast and to have it come up again.... It is understandable that you do not want to deal with chemo or surgery... you've been there, done that... it was supposed to take care of it all!!!! You were starting to dream again about things going well withoutCA...
You are going through a night mare and your feelings are just echoed by all of us who go through the same thing.... does not make it any better .... it just stinks!!!
Yet in the midst of all despair, there may be a ray of sunshine... I'm praying for you, crazylady. Though I do think it's always harder to have to do things over, after you thought you were done, May you be granted peace to even see this as a second chance to make dure it NEVER happens again. May you be granted wisdom to make right decisions about your treatment to come, and controlling emotions around your kids. May your kids be stronger and better human beings because they witness your strength and character in the face of adversity. We are all rooting for you here. Vent all you want!!! blessings,neelieC0 -
Jamie,
I am so very sorry; and know just what you are going through. My recent attack on my lungs came right when I started to feel so NORMAL!!
I am sorry. If all you have is a little met; it can be surgically removed - giving you a 30% CURE rate with surgery alone. (according to my throacic surgeon). Try to stay calm... this is not the end, just a turn in the road of life.
My surgeon told me he has lots of patients that come in every couple of years to get little lung mets removed. Try to keep it all together this weekend.
Wait to see what monday brings and talk to the docs. I hope it can be easily treated, putting all your plans on short term "hold".
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
Come vent anytime.... as long as you need. jana0 -
Dear Jamie,
I am so sorry to hear this news. I can truly relate. I was just about to celebrate my 2 yr anniversary (since original surgery) when a small single lung met was discovered. I was crushed. But, I just stepped back on that rollercoaster. In my case, I had surgery to remove the lung met and now I am on chemo for 6 months. Not fun, but it's OK. Please let us know as your 'battle plan' develops. I know what you mean about craving a normal life, and about not being able to make commitments. Hang in there....and please keep us posted.
Tara0 -
Hi Jamie, just a message from oz telling you our thoughts are with you. We hope that the outcome on monday will not be as bad as you envisage. Keep venting sweetie..we are listening!taraHK said:Dear Jamie,
I am so sorry to hear this news. I can truly relate. I was just about to celebrate my 2 yr anniversary (since original surgery) when a small single lung met was discovered. I was crushed. But, I just stepped back on that rollercoaster. In my case, I had surgery to remove the lung met and now I am on chemo for 6 months. Not fun, but it's OK. Please let us know as your 'battle plan' develops. I know what you mean about craving a normal life, and about not being able to make commitments. Hang in there....and please keep us posted.
Tara
huggs, kanga n Jen0
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