A CRY FOR HELP

Erykah01
Erykah01 Member Posts: 7
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
HOW DO YOU SEEK THE HELP YOU NEED WHEN YOU HAVE BEEN THE ONE THAT HAS BEEN CONSIDERED THE STRONG ONE. I'M A SINGLE MOTHER OF 3 TEENAGERS AND SINCE BEING DIAGNOSED WITH BREAST CANCER TWICE AND GOING THROUGH TREATMENTS AND DOCTORS APPOINTMENTS LIFE HAS REALLY GOTTEN TO BE A STRAIN. I CAN'T SAY THAT MY KIDS DON'T UNDERSTAND BUT SINCE I'M THE ONLY BREAD WINNER OR WAS THE ONLY BREAD WINNER I GUESS THIS CANCER EFFECTS THEM IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE, THEIR MOTHERS FAILING HEALTH AND WHY CAN'T WE DO THE THINGS WE USE TO. IT SEEMS AS THOUGH MY WORLD IS CRUMBLING AROUND ME MY FINANCES ARE OUT OF CONTROL. THIS IS MY CRY SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHERE IS THE HELP.

Comments

  • mssue
    mssue Member Posts: 242
    #2
    I'm so sorry You are having to go through this,there are alot of different things You can check into for assistance.Everyone needs help every now and again--there is no shame in accepting help especially now. Talking about being strong- it is okay to be human, with struggles and trials to go through,Your children need YOU (strong or weak), they may even understand a little better with a clearer view of whats happening around them.
    Check with the local chapter of the American Cancer Society,maybe Your church or maybe some of Your friends ,they may have some ideas-if You've confided in some of them.It's a hard thing to discuss, I know, but no one can help if they don't know.You may also check in on short term disability-if You beleive You will be able to work at a later date.If bills are starting to pile up start calling these folks and let them know Your situation-most of them will work with You-I don't know if Your situation has gotten to this point but if it has You will get through this-this is Your second go around (w/cancer)sounds like You are pretty tough - please hang in there.I didn't mean to take so long responding,I really wasn't sure how to ,I had to think about what You wrote,It is so easy to offend someone--and that's the last thing I would want to do,so please if I've said something You consider rude or unjust--forgive me ! PLEASE !

    You and Your family are in my prayers! Keep us posted - we are here when ever You need us .I hope things take a turn for the better,take really good care of yourself You've been through alot - You can't carry the world on Your shoulders forever-set it down and take a breather-You deserve it.

    God Bless You!
    Sue
  • awjkej
    awjkej Member Posts: 3
    #3
    I am sorry you are going through all that you are. I can't imagine. The local chapter of American Cancer Society is good. Do you have an affiliate of Susan G. Komen Foundation in your area? Your hospital should also have services availalbe for you.

    Have you talked with your doctor about anti-depressant or anti-anxiety medications? They are helpful during this time.

    There is also another great website which has very good/supportive/knowledgable discussion boards....www.breastcancer.org.

    My prayers are with you.

    Anne
  • Erykah01
    Erykah01 Member Posts: 7
    #4
    mssue said:

    I'm so sorry You are having to go through this,there are alot of different things You can check into for assistance.Everyone needs help every now and again--there is no shame in accepting help especially now. Talking about being strong- it is okay to be human, with struggles and trials to go through,Your children need YOU (strong or weak), they may even understand a little better with a clearer view of whats happening around them.
    Check with the local chapter of the American Cancer Society,maybe Your church or maybe some of Your friends ,they may have some ideas-if You've confided in some of them.It's a hard thing to discuss, I know, but no one can help if they don't know.You may also check in on short term disability-if You beleive You will be able to work at a later date.If bills are starting to pile up start calling these folks and let them know Your situation-most of them will work with You-I don't know if Your situation has gotten to this point but if it has You will get through this-this is Your second go around (w/cancer)sounds like You are pretty tough - please hang in there.I didn't mean to take so long responding,I really wasn't sure how to ,I had to think about what You wrote,It is so easy to offend someone--and that's the last thing I would want to do,so please if I've said something You consider rude or unjust--forgive me ! PLEASE !

    You and Your family are in my prayers! Keep us posted - we are here when ever You need us .I hope things take a turn for the better,take really good care of yourself You've been through alot - You can't carry the world on Your shoulders forever-set it down and take a breather-You deserve it.

    God Bless You!
    Sue

    MSSUE
    THANK YOU FOR YOUR ADVICE I WILL DO THE BEST THAT I CAN BUT IT IS HARD FOR ME BECAUSE I AM THE STRONG ONE IN MY FAMILY AND I WILL BE STRONG THROUGH IT ALL AND NO YOU WAS NOT COMING TO STRONG I AM THE TYPE OF PERSON THAT I DO NOT ASK FOR HELP I TRY TO DO IT ON MY OWN AND I NEED TO STOP THAT JUST ASK FOR HELP WHEN I NEED IT SO THANK YOU
    ERICKA
  • seeknpeace
    seeknpeace Member Posts: 259
    #5
    Erykah01 said:

    MSSUE
    THANK YOU FOR YOUR ADVICE I WILL DO THE BEST THAT I CAN BUT IT IS HARD FOR ME BECAUSE I AM THE STRONG ONE IN MY FAMILY AND I WILL BE STRONG THROUGH IT ALL AND NO YOU WAS NOT COMING TO STRONG I AM THE TYPE OF PERSON THAT I DO NOT ASK FOR HELP I TRY TO DO IT ON MY OWN AND I NEED TO STOP THAT JUST ASK FOR HELP WHEN I NEED IT SO THANK YOU
    ERICKA

    Erika, honey, being strong is asking for help. It is showing your children what true strength is. To push through this and beat yourself down is not what you want them to see. You sound like the family "fixer", the one everyone always depends on, etc. Tell them you need the help this time, they will gladly help you and if they do not, ask your oncologist where to turn. They have associations with the right places to find emotional help. It may be at a group situation where you can identify and understand some of your feelings. Good luck, let that wall down. You will live longer.

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