Port removal

gerddy · July 2005

Hello everyone.
Bad day today. I thought I was going to get my port taken out but the surgen talked me into keeping awhile longer.

It's been 6 months sense diagnosis. I'm presently doing radiation and a hysterectomy in Aug. I said because I had 16 positive nodes and stage 3 I might need it again.

I hate this thing. It's like waiting for cancer to come back. I thought if I took it out it would help me with a positive outlook but the surgen makes it sound that no matter what it's coming back. So what's the point if this is all you do for the rest of your life. I'm so pissed.
I know you all will understand, any words of wisdom?

Maybe I'm just having a pitty party.

Gerddy

Idalia · July 2005

Dear Gerddy, get out the pity pot and party, girl! You didn't get what you wanted, boo-hoo! Everyday is a gift, even a bad day. Let people take care of you - tell them you need extra attention, hugs, chocolate, whatever! I am stage 4, bone mets throughout my spine, shoulders, nodules on my lungs and tumor on my thyroid. I am so stiff I walk like an orangatan, but I'm still here and still kickin'. I just got my port in Monday and am looking forward to no more 'missed vein' pokes with a needle. I am on my second chemo therapy and fourth set of radiation treatments. At least the doctors know what we have and we can get treatment. All over the world people are dying of the flu and other 'minor' ailments! I am three years after initial diagnosis and I have really bad days, too. Let it go and find something to be grateful for - family, friends, summer. No one knows what cancer will do. The only thing you can change is your attitude and you can only do that if you want to change! Never give up, never surrender.

lindatn · July 2005

Take some time for prayer and rest. No one told you the cancer was coming back just that he wanted to wait on the port removal. A lot of gals keep them in for a year after treatment. Always be positive, and of course if you really don't want that port in find a DR to take it out, it is your life. You are paying the bills, he is working for you. Linda

tlmac · July 2005

Cancer is such an emotional roller coaster. I was stage II, clean lymph nodes, no port and I'm 2 years past treatment. I can understand your desire to put this behind you. If I were stage IV, your concern over a port might not seem so significant to me. You might try thinking of the port like an umbrella. Whenever you go to the bother of carrying one, you rarely need it. The minute you ignore the possibility of rain and leave it at home, you get soaked. Bottom line is it's your body and should be your choice. I agree with Linda. If you want it out that badly, let your surgeon know it's not negotiable. Good luck!
terri

24242 · July 2005

I am glad you have this place to dump all you feel for that alone can bring you down and add to the stress list. I am sorry you have this to hang onto and yes it is hard to feel positive I know how you feel. I guess the thing I have learned through my 8.4 year battle and it has been that because I was just suppose to be happy I was alive. Yet, I had no quality to my life, I lived in pain and agony for years before I finally convinced someone there was something terribly wrong with me. Layers and layers of pain unleashed a hell I had to live in. There are risks and yes depending on treatments your risks factors go down for that cancer but what about the other cancers now you are at a higher risk of getting. Many more. That is reality no cure.
I have learned to live and have found I have a life worth living again now that my issues have been delt with. Many diseases later and many drugs along the way. Doesn't mean I still won't have my challenges another lump and decisions to make. Life goes on whether we want it to or not and it is worth it all in the end.
We have to do what we can and what we can LIVE with and be comfortable with. Sometimes that is the best that we can do and it will. Not everyone wants the same things and for me getting rid of my breast didn't end my fear for they can't get ever cell. I know a woman who has had breast cancer 4 times here in Canada and she is a singer from my teen years. She was the spokes person for breast cancer when I was going through it here. She was amazing and I was blown away by her because I had seen her documentry when I was battle for my life. I had stage 3 11 out of 21 positive nodes then went on to have three more benign cysts then another mastectomy and that was the doctors talking. I had wanted a double and got talked out of it by my mother she was concerned about trauma and how hard it is on the body. Trauma turned out to be the leading cause of allot of my problems today. I suppose having a raging infection added to the mix and thank God hadn't had that double mast. then.
I am saying all this again because people like me and Idalia have been through allot. It is true that postivity does seem to breed the same and gratitude is amazing. I have been learning a thing or two about INTENTION and there is always work to be done.
Be good to yourself, treating yourself like you would your best friend. This is something most of us don't do.
Tara

hounddog · July 2005

Gerddy
Right now you are going through a storm in your life we all do . I know how you feel I went Through breast cancer two years ago and a total of 4 Chemo treatments . You have to think positive and Keep your trust in the Lord and do not give up we are all here for you .
Each Day that we are alive is a Gift from God and we all have alot to be Thankful for.
Marilyn

Future · July 2005

Gerddy,

It's your body and if you want the port out, tell them to take it out.
I am also a StageIII survivor and getting that port out was important to me. We never want to think about a reoccurrence but if need aport can always be reinsered. If getting the port out helps you feel you are "winning the fight" then do it.

Mary

Port removal

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