Update on Bob ! Trouble dealing with anger!!

bsrules
bsrules Member Posts: 296
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Good Evening Everyone!!!!

Well, Things here aren't going any better!!! We have been trying to get into the experimental phase of drugs testing for treatments for Bob with no luck! First they say that he qualifies and then after going through all the paperwork and testing they come back and say sorry this isn't for you. Why do they do that. They said that the last 2 trials we tried that it was because of the meds he was on. Why don't they every read the files and on the other info that they are given. Whay do they put people through this. They get your hopes up and then they pull the rug out from under you.

We went to the Dr.'s today to find out what happened with this last trial and we found out again that he doesn't qualify. They said that there was another treatment we could try and that they would send it to his Dr. and Bob Dr. said that this was crazy. He told me to call the office down there when we got home which I did and when they said that someone would be there till 5:00pm and I called at 4:30pm and no one was there to answer the phone so I had to leave a voice message. This place came so highly recommended and so far I am not impressed at all. I am so angry with this whoe situation and it is all I can do to keep my temper in check after I listen to the Dr.'s tall me the same thing over and over again. His Dr. isn't giving up on him but Bob did tell him that he is now feeling like he is a dot on the wall that no one is paying any attention to. I kills me to hear him talk like that. I just want to choke the Dr.'s for making him feel this way. I know that I have to get passed this but I don't know how to right now. He is so angry and I can't blame him. I want to just shout but I don't wanthim to see me so worked up over this. Even though he knows that I am upset.

What doesn't help the situation is that I just found out yesterday that our company was sold and I don't know if our new owners will be keeping us on or will let all of us go. So know on top of everything else I am at risk of loosing my job. I haven't told Bob this yet as he doesn't need to hear this on top of everything else. I just want to run away and hide. I know that doesn't solve anything!!!! I am just tired of being pushed and pulled around by everyone except my wonderful husband Bob!!!!

I'm sorry for going on and probably no making any sence. I guess I am just having a back week!!

WE are in need of some good news even if it is just a little bite!!!! Just having the Dr. call me back would help!!

Thank You for listening!!! Please keep Bob is your prayers. He is in alot of pain right now and unable to get any sleep. He is having a rough go of it and he is still hoping to beat this!!!

Emily I got your paper work and am looking as we speak!!!

Thank You everyone for being there for us!!!!!

Bob and Sue

Comments

  • 2bhealed
    2bhealed Member Posts: 2,064 Member
    Sue,

    It must be enough to make you wanna go POSTAL!!

    I would say if they close the doors on you look for the open windows....look into Oasis of Hope or The Gerson Institute. There are so many others out there. Just pick up an issue of Alternative Medicine magazine and there are all sorts of clinics to go to....legit ones too...not shady charlatans...but REAL cancer curing places.

    Keep looking but look elsewhere!!

    keep us posted and if you have any questions on the paperwork I sent feel free to ask away.

    peace, emily who does yoga so she won;t go postal!! haha
  • steved
    steved Member Posts: 834 Member
    Sounds like you are going through an incredibly hard time at the moment and your reaction to it all seems perfectly appropriate. You do need an outlet for the frustration though and this site can be fab for that so feel free to rant to us as much as is needed. Perhaps talking to others may help too- friends and family can be useful though they often struggle as they are trying to cope with it all too so professionals such as counsellors or specialist oncology nurses can be useful in helping you deal with the emotions that are inevitable during this time.
    However, don;t give up. These fights are often worth it in the end and although things seem hopeless at times it does sound like there are still options that are worth perservering with. Let us know how it all goes. Best of luck,
    Steve.
  • kangatoo
    kangatoo Member Posts: 2,105 Member
    steved said:

    Sounds like you are going through an incredibly hard time at the moment and your reaction to it all seems perfectly appropriate. You do need an outlet for the frustration though and this site can be fab for that so feel free to rant to us as much as is needed. Perhaps talking to others may help too- friends and family can be useful though they often struggle as they are trying to cope with it all too so professionals such as counsellors or specialist oncology nurses can be useful in helping you deal with the emotions that are inevitable during this time.
    However, don;t give up. These fights are often worth it in the end and although things seem hopeless at times it does sound like there are still options that are worth perservering with. Let us know how it all goes. Best of luck,
    Steve.

    Hi Sue and Bob, no words I can say Sue are going to improve things for you both Sue, I wish that there was something I could say to help. All I can send you is our love and prayers. You know we are here to listen--we are always here and thinking daily about you guys.
    luv n huggs, kanga n Jen
  • grandma047
    grandma047 Member Posts: 381
    Hi Sue, I am so sorry that you are going through this. Doctors can be a pain at times. Don't ever give up though. If you don't feel happy with what one doctor tells you, go get another opinion. That's what I'm doing next week. I'll be seeing a new urologist. Also, I can relate about the job situation. My husband was laid off last Friday(I just got a new car last month) so that really worries me. I will certainly be praying for you both. And anytime you need to come here and vent, do it. I do it all the time. LOL. Keep us updated and I hope you hear back from the doctor soon.
    Love and prayers, Judy(grandma047)
  • nanuk
    nanuk Member Posts: 1,358 Member
    Have you been to the National Cancer Information Service? 1-800-4-Cancer. They will search the entire country for eligible trials. You just give them your
    information, and they do the work & send you a list of all trials /centers dealing with your type/stage of cancer. Bud
  • Sue and Bob, I was going to suggest what Nanuk did about calling the National Cancer Association...I've heard that they are indeed very helpful.

    Gosh, I pray and hope for some good news for you both real soon. Steve is right...don't give up. Things worth having are things worth fighting for and for most of us, for every good fight we give, the reward was worth it.

    Take a few deep breaths, relax a minute or two, and bounce off those ropes, fists swinging!!!!!

    Hugs,
    Monika